Penny signs the ticket book and hands it back to the police officer, standing along side her car. She thinks 'Great another bill I can't pay for'.
Officer Carol takes a long look at her, then tears out the ticket, "Miss you need to pay attention to stop signs when you drive. If someone was going across the other way you would have had a very serious accident.", he then hands Penny the ticket.
Penny sighs and almost whispering tells him "I'm sorry officer, I will be more careful the next time". He sees she is almost crying so he tells her to "Have a nice day" and figures it is best to leave quickly. Penny watches him walk to the car and waits till the police car has left before she resumes her way back to the apartment, trying to drive more slowly and alert as she can with tears in her eyes.
Penny had been going over her situation in her head since she had left work. This last week had been a real bad one for her and in reality the week before hadn't been much different. Business was real slow at the Cheesecake Factory and her tips had been horrible, so her weekly income had been half of the little she usually got. When she thought of her acting career, that was also nothing but failure too. She paid for acting lessons and couldn't get a job, which just contributed to her negative cash flow. Penny had been going over her expenses, in her head, and comparing them to the money she made and she saw no hope for getting her pay and expenses even close to lining up. She couldn't support herself and she felt like a failure again. The last straw was today's shift when she was sent home early, just after lunch, when she really needed the money from working the dinner shift. She was upset and distracted, when she ran the stop sign, trying to figure out how she was going to pay bills.
She reached her apartment building, slowly going in, her mind on autopilot. Stopping to get her mail, on the way up the stairs, the mail woke her from her trance when she saw credit car bills and the letter from her college. The college letter was specifically letting her know her student loan was disapproved (because of bad credit) and therefore she needed to pay her tuition immediately. The additional weight of these financial responsibilities made the walk up the stairs seem long and tiring, especially since at each landing she had to look at the broken elevator door and its out of order sign. She knew Leonard was responsible for the broken elevator and she silently cursed 'Damm you Leonard' as she kept hiking up to her apartment, not really understanding why it bothered her anymore today than before, but so was the state her mind was in.
She made it to the fourth floor, more tired that she could remember, unlocked her door and was almost in her apartment, with the door closed, when the apartment door across the hall opened and out walked Leonard. He looked over at her confused and concerned, "Penny"? "You're home early." All she could think of was 'Great!'
All she could say was "Yeah" , as she didn't bother closing her door and just walked over to her small kitchen to find the wine bottle she kept there. She poured a quick glass and downed it , all before Leonard walked through her apartment door. She signed and looked at the door, it didn't matter if she had closed it or not, Leonard would have still insisted on coming in and talking and she didn't want to have an argument with him now. Why did he have to see her now, she thought, why couldn't she have sneaked into her apartment and talked to him later, when she knew what she was going to do. All she could think of was 'Not Now Leonard'.
Leonard was looking at her, concern on his face, and she knew her tear stained makeup and tears, still fresh on her face, were bothering him because he asked, "Penny what happened! Are you alright?" Again, she didn't know what to say and just watched his face become even more concerned, if that was possible. She must watched him for a long time, even though it was really only a second or two, until he was about to talk again. She couldn't tell him her financial problems because every time she thought of them she felt like a loser and it made her feel stupid in front of him. So she lied.
"I had a bad time at work with customers, so I asked and got the rest of the day off", it just came out, she didn't even remember planning to say it.
She just watched him and saw his face change from fear and confusion to compassion, but she really didn't want him to feel sorry for her, pity her, have empathy for the loser who failed as an actress and now couldn't even support herself. She wanted be alone, no she really didn't know what she wanted, maybe just to cry, but he wanted to talk, why did we have to talk, now. So she then she got a little idea to give him some truth hoping it would end his questions
"I was feeling a little down and on the way home and I got a traffic ticket, so I just began crying, that's all."
She really hadn't given him much information, so Leonard wasn't sure what to say next so he said the first thing that came to mind: "Penny, everything will be OK."
Again, all she could do is look at him, 'No its not going to be OK, Leonard' she thought.
Leonard, being Leonard, just wanted to help her, "I love you, Penny, is there anything I can do to help you through this?" he said with a sympathetic small smile.
Penny was impatient, tired and really didn't want to talk, and she didn't want Leonard's help right now, so she just finished her second glass of wine and poured the third, to stall answering him. All her life whenever she got really scared, really felt helpless, she would use anger to regain control of the situation, it was in a way so natural for her, she didn't even realize it was happening and again like many times before the wine wasn't helping, she was getting angry. When she was angry, Leonard paid the price.
But for the first time, she looked at him and thought, 'I love you, too' and her temper was held in check and she decided to talk to him, a little, instead of just getting mad.
"Leonard, I really need to be alone for a little bit and sort things out, OK, please honey, if you love me, just let me be alone for a little bit" she pleaded with him.
He stares at her and starts to speak but stops, thinks about it then nods. "OK, you want come over and eat Chinese with us at six thirty?"
Penny gives him a small smile, 'Thank you, you said the right thing' she thinks and tells him "Yes, see you then."
Leonard turns and walks out, closing the door behind him, careful to not let Penny see he is unhappy about their conversation, because he knows she is holding something back, and he is still concerned about her.
Leonard is now gone and all is quiet again, Penny looks at the wine bottle, had she really just drank half of it? Suddenly all the stress that has built up in her that day, plus the wine, hits her and makes her sick to her stomach. Penny runs to bathroom and throws up. Surprisingly, just as suddenly, after she empties her stomach, she feels a little better, and when rinsing out her mouth, she sees herself in the mirror realizing what a sight Leonard must have seen when he looked at her. She stares at herself, sighs, and even though it was only two in the afternoon, Penny is tired. She walks to her bed, falls in and is asleep almost immediately.