Secrets

Xander stared at the pieces of paper clutched tightly in his hand. The black ink was now committed to memory. "Please tell me that doesn't say what I know it says," he asked his two best friends.

"They look pretty real Xand," Willow Rosenburg murmured.

He would always remember the day he found the adoption papers. It was a few weeks after Willow had returned from England. They had been catching up and looking through his old things from high school. Of course his parents couldn't be civilized while they had guests and got into another drunken row, and the attic was the only place to escape their yelling. The papers had been lying amongst old photos and bills, gathering dust. Alexander Winchester, not Harris. He had never been a Harris.

"Look at it this way," Willow continued. "You're always saying you hate your parent's right? You might have a family that's the complete opposite to them. They might even be rich or famous! I'll look them up if you want."

Xander was looking more and more lost each minute. Gone was the mask of jokes he so often wore. "I know I say that, but doesn't everyone? They're all I've ever known Wills. This is my life and if it isn't real then who am I? I'm not really me. And why didn't they tell me about any of this? Why didn't they want me?"

Willow glanced at Buffy helplessly. Buffy had never seen him like this before. The only time that had come close was when she had lied about Angel coming back from hell. But anger she could deal with. The fear she saw in his eyes was something different, and alarming even for a slayer. It wasn't the life or death fear she was used to either, it was something else.

"That's not true," Buffy said firmly. "I don't think family makes you who you are. They can help you on your way. But you're still you. A good person and my friend. That won't change."

"Hmmm. Nothing coming up on Winchester," said Willow, staring at her computer screen. "Unless…" she blinked. The family's home town had appeared on a website. Something about a fire. The dad had made it out alive with two sons and then they had all disappeared seemingly off the face of the earth. Well, Xander didn't need to know something like that! At least not now. There had to be something else. "I'll keep looking."

Buffy frowned at her tone, but luckily Xander was too distracted to notice.

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"I swear if you try and change the music one more time Sam," warned Dean.

"Ok, ok. But this can get old fast!" Sam answered in mock surrender.

"I can't believe you said that. You seriously want your ass out on the road?" Dean defended his band of the moment.

Sam couldn't help the smirk that was appearing on his face.

"You asked for it!" Dean swerved the car on the empty road and pulled to a sudden stop.

"Welcome to Sunnydale. Looks like I won't have to walk far!" he answered, not moving an inch.

Finally, Dean rolled his eyes. "How this town can be as bad a place as you say it is beats me. I mean, it is called Sunnydale."

"Well, there's all those strange stories about the old high school being blown up on graduation day. And even before that. And that nightmare I had about that boy in trouble…what was his name again?"

"Alexander."

"Right. I remember someone calling him that. xander . He was in trouble."

Dean started the car again. "If this goes bad for us, I'm telling dad it's you're fault!"

Sam frowned. "I know it looked like something serious, but I'm not sure it'll turn out bad. Like this is important to us somehow. You know what I mean?"

"Hardly ever Sammy. But let's go find out if you're right."