A/N: Here are two REPO! Drabbles that I came up with while surfing an appendix-removing thread on .com. Have fun with the drabbles!
Appendectomy I – a REPO! Drabble
My name is Silia EverBlott, and I'm running from an organ REPO! Man. Y'see, I got a new kidney, and things went a little awry with my payments. So here I am, rushing down a gross little ally in the heart of GeneCo's city – I pass a blue-glowing dumpster – so that's where Grave Robber's lounging this week, I think, my mind temporarily off the subject of getting cut up into little pieces. I slow down a little. Where the hell am I going again? I stop in the middle of the ally, blanking out.
Suddenly this guy drops from the fucking sky with a scalpel in his gloved hand.
I'm still standing in the middle of a gross ally blanking out on where I'm going.
Before I know it, I'm slumped against a brick wall with a scalpel in my gut. I look down at the mess, and ponder . . .
"Hey dude – could you jag out my appendix while you're at it?"
"CHK—What?"
"Appendix. You're kinda in my gut – as long as you're harvesting my kidney, you wanna jag out my appendix while you're at it?"
He looked at me and those dorky blue lights in the helmet sorta blinded me. "CHK – What the hell?" He says, shrugging. I look down and see him cutting into my lower abdomen – and he rips out this little stringy red thing. That's my appendix? Seriously? Wow – I pictured it smaller and more of a blue-ish color. The red might just be the blood though . . . but the size is kinda disappointing.
" . . . I intend to keep my other kidney, though. I just didn't' really want to have one kidney, when I signed for the Op, that is. Now I accept the life of having one kidney. You can keep the appendix, though. But with the other kidney thing . . . could you like, sew me up or something? I have a weird blood type – I don't wanna have to pay for that too."
So, he sewed me up without a word. We both got up and started to walk away. I turned around, "Hey, Nathan? Thanks for the Op."
Just then, GR popped outta his dumpster. "I'm trying to fuckin' sleep here – keep the fuckin' repo's down to minimum sound level, will ya?"
I shrugged, "Whatever, Jason Fell."
"IT'S FUCKIN' GRAVEROBBER, Ms. Fuckin' silia!"
"Whatever."
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Appendectomy II – A REPO! Drabble.
"Mommy, I don't wanna have my append – append-is taken out." Little Timmy said.
"Awww . . . It's OK, Timmy. You'll be fine."
"But what if the Rebo man comes?"
I frowned, "It's ok Timmy! Everything's paid for! No need to worry over Repo men!" I said as he was wheeled into surgery. I frowned again, I hope everything's paid for.
"Hello Mrs . . . is it Betterson?" Rotti Largo asked, coming in through the automatic door.
"Yes, Tamantha Betterson. Pleasure to meet you."
"Pleasure to meet you, too. I'm here to talk to you about a contract."
"For Timmy's surgery . . . OK. Shoot."
"We offer Easy Organ Financing© here at GeneCo, so there should be absolutely no worries about little Timmy's surgery! Now, all you have to do is sign right here . . . . And everything should be A-OK!" He said, offering out a contract and giving me a friendly, pedo-ish smile.
I look over the contract, "How the hell do you repossess and appendix?"
He chuckled, "No need to worry about that . . . ."
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Timmy came out of surgery fine – but I was still worried.
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A week later, Nathan Wallace was at my house with an appendix in a jar.
Apparently . . . reverse Repo's are now part of GeneCo's Easy Organ Financing©.
. . . . Good to know, in these times . . . .