Nazgul – Just something that got me thinking
At the time of the forging of the great rings my husband, lord and master of all the lands around us, was called to receive a ring, one of the nine rings, though I did not know it.
My husband was a kind man, and I loved him more than words can tell. But now loved is in the past tense for I have no soul or heart to love with.
He was more thoughtful than most and, struck by the rings beauty he declared that it would only be right for me to bear it and so the ring passed to me. It shone even when there was no light but I, in my foolish state of joy saw no trick in this gift, only idyllic beauty. I am sure my husband would never have given me the ring if he himself had suspected anything but it was still too late that I saw the danger and it has been long days since the time I was bidden far away from my home by the dark lords wishes.
I become a Nazgul, Ringwraith.
When Sauron had been 'defeated' we were not set free. We all knew, while others merely guessed, he had not been destroyed and we were still imprisioned under his evil command.
For a long time we did nothing. Time had no meaning. We waited, never alive, nor dead. Where my body went I do not know. I became nothing, I just faded away. I was a shadow of any former being I could have once been. My name faded away, along with my soul, until there was almost nothing left of me.
A length of time passed. I say 'length' because I do not know how long it was. But then Sauron's eye opened wide and we were commanded to go and find the ring. We were given horses, and robes to disguise the shadows we were.
It is impossible to describe the way he had total command over us. We could do nothing, think nothing, see nothing if he did not control it, but all the while the one part of me left observed, like a hostage to evil my own actions.
When the gates of Minas Morgul opened and we were set free to do his evil work. Set free is a inaccurate way to describe it because in no way were we free.
We rode like the wind, or rather they rode like the wind. We, ourselves, I have said, were lost.
A single day was the same as a day a thousand years ago, a day a thousand years to come. Each day passed like the beating of a heart, even though we did not have one. We saw countless people die at our swords, even though we could not see. Innocent people, people with families. Sauron had no mercy and neither did we but all the while we could neither think, nor complain, nor even comprehend what we were doing. The ring was all that mattered. For the ring meant power and power was all Sauron needed and desired.
The days passed swiftly and they were gone. All the time since forever could have been a single day for all I knew and thought.
The long single day of endless moments passed.
Sauron was destroyed.
A few of our number were also destroyed but I.. I was not. I have power of myself now the one ring has gone. I cast away my dark robes. But under my dark robes nothing is left. Everything has gone. Only my thought remains. My husband and his family have gone but who knows? Maybe I'll find them again.
Maybe I'll find myself again, maybe eternity can wash away the bloodstains of hate upon me, and maybe one day I shall have a soul again and my heart, long faded away, shall return and be filled with the memories I have lost.
For I am a Nazgul, Ringwraith, neither alive, nor dead.