I own nothing. written for the leverage land prompt Disaster! Enjoy
Eliot has been through many disasters of many kinds, Military Ops gone wrong, getting himself into situations he barely scraped his way out of, trying to untangle Parker's freaky ass brand of logic, but nothing had prepared him for this…baby sitting.
"Ok Eli, the numbers are on the fridge and I'll be back by six…Hopefully." She handed him his eight month old niece. "Faith I- I'm not , I don't do babies, and It' like he just ate fifty pixie sticks or something." He nodded to his six year old nephew Noah who was currently jumping up and down on the couch. Faith kissed his cheek "Thanks for helping out baby brother I'd never get my Christmas shopping done without you, and Noah Shane stop jumping on my couch." she ordered without looking at him and swept out the door. The kid stopped jumping and landed on his butt in the cushions. "I'm bored." Noah lamented.
The baby looked at him speculatively from his hip. Yep, totally
destined for disaster. He stalked over to the window to watch his sister leave looking out at the snow blanketed yard an idea struck him.
-/-/-/-
In the safety of their snow fort they meticulously waged their war on innocent people passing by. Noah wound up and lobbed a snow ball at Mister Puffins the cat knocking the orange tabby of his feet. The baby giggled from where she was strapped to Eliot's chest wearing a puffy pink coat that made her resemble a star fish. "Was that funny Maddie?" he asked.
Noah turned to him. "How many points is the cat worth?" his brown eyes shining gleefully. Oh yeah they were most definitely related to him.
About that time Old Mrs. Crane came out wielding her broom.
"Come on lil Man that old lady is as crazy as Parker and twice as mean as Sterling lets go in."
"Who are Parker and Sterling?"
"The bane of my existence."
-/-/-/-
Some home made hot chocolate and a couple episodes of Sponge bob and Noah had passed out on the love seat.
He changed the baby. "Thanks for not pooping baby girl, that wouldn't of been pretty." he used a burp rag to wipe her snotty nose. She wailed her dislike at him. "Sorry Darlin' can't let you be the kid with the crusty nose can I?" she continued crying he laid her on his shoulder and tried not panic.
"Food! Food helps everything ." He kissed her on the top of the head and set about making a bottle, Absentmindedly singing Blue Eyes Crying In The Rain. Maddie's cries quieted considerably to muted mewling then stopped.
"That works on women of all ages," He said to himself smirking.
-/-/-/-
When Faith returned arms laden with bags she was surprised to find her house still standing and its occupants asleep in the living room. Noah was curled up on the love seat snoring softly his face was stained with chocolate.
She smiled cocking her head toward where Eliot lay sleeping on the couch with Maddie sleeping soundly on his chest sucking her thumb.
No matter how much he tried to deny it her brother was good people. She walked over and shook him awake. He jerked instantly into consciousness.
"They are still alive and seem unharmed I think you did better than you thought."
"I'm a hitter not a sitter Faith but… it was kinda fun just don't tell anyone!" He smiled they had all survived disaster averted. He sighed in relief.