Author's Note: This story is ancient (and terrible - honestly). Consider it archived.

'Morning, Ken-chan,' Daisuke Motamiya said cheerfully to his best friend.

'Morning, Dai-chan,' muttered Ken Ichijoji, boy genius.

Daisuke frowned and tilted his head to one side, his goggles threatening to fall sideways off his thick, brown hair.

'Ken-chan, what's wrong?' he asked curiously, looking up for a brief moment to see if the teacher was looking before quickly scooting over to the seat next to Ken.

'Nothing, Daisuke, don't worry about it,' Ken mumbled to his friend.

Daisuke frowned again.

'You know I've picked up on the times that you're really troubled, because you seem to use my full name,' Daisuke pointed out to him. 'You haven't been feeling very good lately, have you? Ken-chan?'

'Listen,' said Ken. 'I'm sorry if it looks that way or anything, but I'm fine. I promise. Now, if you please, I would like to do some schoolwork. Maths is my favourite subject, as you probably know.'

Daisuke sighed and nodded.

'If anything is troubling you, do let me know,' he whispered softly in the blunette's left ear.

Ken nodded once before looking up at the board and copying notes that Wakinabe Sensei was writing on the board. Daisuke followed suit.

After School

Ken just ran, his hat down low so that the brim was shielding his face from the heavy rain. No, he didn't want to catch Daisuke on the way to the bus today - that meddling child was already annoying him with his continuous accusations of Ken's emotions.

That meddling child is your best friend and the love of your life, the small voice at the back of his mind reminded him.

Ken shook that thought out of his head. Best friend or not, he couldn't see him. Not today, at least. He had to get home and get this pain out of his head the only way he knew how.

But what if he starts to think you're deliberately avoiding him?

Ken stopped dead in his tracks, nearly falling head-over-heels. He hadn't thought about that. Maybe, just maybe, he could be hurting Daisuke's feelings too; maybe, amongst all that fear built up inside of him that Daisuke may find out the real reason behind this uncomfortableness, this insecurity, there's the possibility that Daisuke might be feeling like Ken doesn't like him at all?

An unspeakable feeling of dread washed over Ken as he took all of this in. What should he do though - should he keep running from the pain of his heart, or come back to the boy that turned his life upside down and stammer an apology? Would it gain the smile and hug it always had though? Damn it, he had no idea!

He walked the few feet across the road and sat alone at the bus stop. He was already there, he would phone Daisuke tonight and apologise for being so secretive and for running off so fast. But what if it was too late? What if Daisuke had already made up his mind as to keeping Ken close by? These thoughts brought another, more painful feeling of dread to rush over him like a wave on the beach. He was so damn confused! What should he do?

He thought of one thing to do. The boy was the child of Friendship, he might still have a chance. He would call him tonight and ask, no beg, for forgiveness. Yes, maybe if he begged Daisuke would take him back. But what if he didn't? Oh God, why had that one thought plague him now! Why couldn't it have popped up ages ago, when he could have done something about it? He was a very intelligent boy - God knows the world knew that - he should have thought of it ages ago, and shouldn't be risking everything now.

But it was, once again, the only thing he could think of at the time as he stood up and held his arm up to signal to the bus driver coming around the corner that he wanted to be picked up. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly as the bus came to a stop, the electronic doors swinging open for him as he made to board the vehicle.

Trying to sound fine, he greeted the bus driver.

'Afternoon,' Ken said quietly, handing a small amount of money to the driver. 'A single ticket, please. I'm not travelling far.'

The driver nodded, punching the buttons on the register and handing Ken a ticket.

'Thank you.'

Ken sat down right at the front so that anyone who was in the bus couldn't see the tears that had started to drizzle softly down Ken's cheeks.

'Hey,' said the bus driver as they took off. 'Aren't you Ken Ichijoji?'

Ken looked up a little, just enough to see the driver. 'Who wants to know?'

'I do, of course,' the driver said with a smile. 'Ken's a intellectual genius. To see him walking down the street is worth a million dollars, let alone drive the bus he caught.'

Ken snorted. He certainly wasn't worth that much. Besides, he mused, how would this man react if he and the rest of the world found out that their famous "intellectual genius" was gay? He chuckled inwardly to himself.

'Yeah, I'm Ken.'

'Wow, that's so cool,' the bus driver said cheerfully. 'I thought you were. You know, I watch your show on TV all the time.'

Ken looked up at the driver again.

'You do?'

'Of course! And I daresay that the rest of the world does as well. You are certainly brilliant at Maths and computers, what school do you go to?'

'Odaiba Elementary,' Ken replied, feeling a little better knowing that the rest of the world still had faith in him.

'Well good, you've helped me decide where my twins are going next year,' the driver chuckled, making Ken smile lightly. 'So… I know this is none of my business, but I'm curious; why did you disappear? And why are you so upset?'

It was only then that Ken actually realised that he was crying on a public bus, in front of a total stranger almost. He hurriedly wiped the tears still dancing on his cheeks and looked down.

'I - I -' he stammered, trying to put logic with common sense and produce a reasonable excuse. 'I was… er…'

'If it's a personal reason you don't have to say,' the driver exclaimed, shocked that Ken was out of words. 'I mean, nobody would want the whole world to know. It was probably -'

'It was a childish pursuit,' Ken said quickly, trying to take his mind off the Digital World and the Digimon Kaiser. 'I have moved past such stupidity.'

The driver nodded. 'Where do you get off, Ken?'

'Up here,' Ken replied, standing up and walking to the front to point out the windscreen at a bus stop just up the road. He kept his hat down and didn't let the man fully see his face.

'It was nice to meet you, Ken,' the driver said sincerely as he opened the doors so that Ken could get off. 'You know it's rare that celebrities actually catch public transport. It was an honour to drive you home.'

'Yeah... thanks,' Ken replied, faking cheer in the small smile he gave the driver.

He turned around and started to walk towards his apartment, his bedroom, his source of relief of the pain that had been his feelings of overwhelming love that he had no doubt would not be returned. He expected his conversation with the driver would spread like wildfire around the world, how he got to talk to the famous Ken Ichijoji, who could do anything but win his crush's heart.

He spat on the pavement before making a swift left up the stairs into the apartment building. He walked briskly to the elevator and pressed the up button, glad that it didn't take half an hour to get to the ground floor from the top and instead opened straight away on request. He walked inside and jabbed the button, smiling when he felt the immediate jerk of what he knew were the cables working hard to lift the elevator to the seventh floor.

When the doors opened, he practically ran out of the elevator and to his apartment room.

'Hi, Ken, how was your day at school?' he heard his mother from the kitchen.

'Fine, Okaasan. Yourself?' Ken responded politely. It was important that after he had put her through all that hell and then run away that she was treated with care, especially from him.

'I've been great,' Mrs. Ichijoji said cheerfully. 'I'm glad that you're home, darling.'

'Thanks,' Ken called as he went into his room.

He shut the door quietly behind him, careful as not to disturb the sleeping Digimon on the bottom bunk of his bed. Then, moving swiftly to get more time before any more interruptions, he moved towards his computer desk and opened the left drawer. He pulled out a knife - a short, but sharp one - and closed the drawer back up again. Looking back at the door and then at Wormmon, making sure that there would be no interruptions, he sat down at his desk and concentrated.

He brought the sharpest side to his wrist, toying with it. He laid it down flat on the surface of his skin, feeling the cold radiating from the metal, then rolled it over to the other side to drain the cold from that side too. When he decided he should stop playing, brought the knife up so that the sharp edge was resting on his wrist, tilted forwards ever so slightly, then bit his lip to stop him from crying out as he slashed the blade across his wrist, piercing the skin and cutting deep.

He covered the wound with his un harmed hand and waited for the blood flow to slow down so that it could clot over the cut and heal.

Suddenly he thought he heard something. He was about to turn around to see if it was Wormmon waking up when he heard something else as well.

'Ken-Chan? Nan de?'

Ken spun on his chair in horror to see the boy - the angel of his nightmares, the hero that made his world collapse and land in a puddle at the boy's feet, only to be picked up with strong arms and carried back to the safety of his embrace without knowing it.

Daisuke's lips parted in shock horror as his beautiful brown eyes flittered down to where Ken's knife sat in his lap, mere inches away from where his right hand covered the bloodstained wound on the other.

'Ken-Chan…' Daisuke whispered.

He didn't know what to do. Should he scold Ken for hurting the beautiful boy he adored so much? For bruising the smooth, silky skin that tormented his dreams? Or should he scoop the horrified blunette into his arms and carry him to the bed where he would hold him close and tell him that every thing was going to be alright, and how much he loved him?

Ken shamefully looked down at his feet, tears starting to flood uncontrollably down his face.

'D-Daisuke, I-I'm s-so sorry f-for p-p-pushing you a-away,' Ken stammered, pushing the knife off his lap and falling to his knees at Daisuke's feet. 'I - you really don't d-d-deserve this… this crap... I'm so, s-sorry, Daisuke-kun...'

'Ken-Chan, don't call me that,' Daisuke said from above.

He leaned down and pulled the younger boy close for a hug.

'I want you to call me Dai-Chan, just like you used to,' he said to Ken, tears staining his cheeks. 'You are my Ken-Chan, I am your Dai-Chan. That's how it used to be and that's how I want it.'

'Your Ken-Chan?' Ken asked slowly, heart pounding and head spinning as the thought of what that might actually mean flitted around like electricity through his body. 'M-my Dai-Chan?'

Daisuke pulled his head back a bit and nodded.

'You are my Ken-Chan, I am you Dai-Chan,' he whispered softly into the boy's ear. 'I love you, my Ken-Chan, and I know you love me.'

Ken pulled back faster than lightning, the fastest he had ever moved in his life most likely. He looked Dai-Chan in the eye and saw a reflection of himself in his big brown eyes. A reflection that Ken suddenly had no doubt would be etched into Daisuke's eyes and mind forever.

A sudden passion overcame Ken momentarily and he gave in to the wild rush of feelings that seemed to be showing no mercy; not now that they had just been given permission to wreak havoc on the target of choice.

After that everything was a haze. He remembered Daisuke leaning forward, his lips brushing Ken's ever so softly - and then all thought was lost as he found himself being pulled fully into the older boy's embrace, their mouths meeting again, but harder this time. They let the kiss linger for a few moments before Ken could stand it no more and kissed Daisuke ravenously. Daisuke responded in kind.

They broke their kiss quicker than either of them would have liked when a noise was heard by the door. They spun their heads to face what it was that made the offending sound and saw the door open. Mrs. Ichijoji was peering in, a look of pure shock on her face at the sight of her son on his knees in front of the crouching brunette whom he had been kissing mere seconds ago.

She jumped backward, hand over her mouth as though she had had no intention of making any sound whatsoever to disturb the lovesick men.

'I'm - I'm sorry,' she spluttered, the look of horror still present on her face. 'I - I'll just - I'll go now -'

'Okaasan, wait,' Ken gasped as he leaped up and ran to the door. 'Wait. Please.'

Mrs. Ichijoji turned abruptly to face her only son.

'I don't approve of this, I hope you know, Ken,' she said faintly, her voice shaking as though she had been winded. 'I really don't… I…'

'Mother,' Ken asked quietly, afraid of the worst. 'Are you - are you homophobic?'

Mrs. Ichijoji looked back and forth between the two boys. She opened and closed her mouth several times as though she was going to say something but thought the better of it. After several minutes, she finally spoke.

'Ken - yes,' she said slowly, picking her words. 'Well... I guess… I don't know, I…'

Ken looked horrified. He had gone through hell and back, fallen in love with his saviour who he knew wouldn't return the feelings. Now he had finally gotten to him and he was being taken away again from the most unlikely person - his mother. He couldn't stop the tears that were welling up in his eyes.

Apparently, Mrs. Ichijoji saw this as her face softened to become kind and concerned once again.

'Oh, Ken,' she said softly, as if to regret everything she had said about not approving. 'I - I just don't know…'

She looked back at Daisuke, who appeared to, like her, just want to take Ken in his arms and cuddle him for as long as he was able to. Her logical mind came back from where it had been kicked to when she had pocked her head in Ken's door, and she decided to consider the possibilities. This boy seemed to make Ken happy, which was apparent due to the fact that Ken looked positively torn about what was happening now.

She sighed and nodded.

'If he makes you happy, then I'm happy,' she murmured, earning a surprised look from both teenagers. She turned back to Daisuke. 'If you break his heart though, I'll kill you, you know that?'

She smiled a half hearted smile that was returned with warmth.

'You'll have to dig me up first,' Daisuke said with a laugh. 'Because I would have been dead and long rotten by suicide by the time you reach me.'

Mrs. Ichijoji had only a few seconds to see the sincerity sparkling in his eyes before she was drowned in a vicious hug from Ken.

'Okaasan, you have no idea how much this means to me,' he whispered, burying his head in her hair. 'No idea.'

Mrs. Ichijoji beamed at him.

'Well I know you're happy, that's a start,' she said laughing. 'I'll - I'll be in the kitchen making dinner. You two… Just don't get up to two much mischief, ok?'

Ken and Daisuke grinned at each other.

'Yes Mother.'

'We won't, Mrs. Ichijoji.'

Mrs. Ichijoji turned around and walked back down the stairs and into the kitchen. Ken walked back to Daisuke and slipped his hand in his partners.

'Dai-Chan?' Ken asked as they walked back into the bedroom.

'Yes, Ken-Chan?' Daisuke replied airily from beside him.

'I'm sorry for everything,' he whispered. 'I'm sorry for keeping secrets and I'm sorry for pushing away from you. I'm sorry that you had to witness me in a state of depression, seemingly being able to do nothing. I realised this afternoon exactly how painful that must feel.'

He recalled the conversation with the rest of his mind as he walked to the bus stop after school.

'Ken-Chan, stop apologising,' Daisuke laughed. 'The only thing in life you will ever need to apologise for is for apologising too much, and then that will be even worse!'

The two boys laughed.

'Ken?' Ken heard a voice for the third time today.

Ken turned towards the bed, smiling.

'What's up, Wormmon?'

He went over and sat on the bottom bunk next to his Digimon partner, scooping him up and placing him in his lap.

'What's going on?' the confused little Digimon asked. 'I woke up to hear you shouting to your mother, and running out the door. I didn't hear what was said. What's happening?'

Ken covered his still wounded wrist that his mother managed to miss, and smiled up at Daisuke, who returned it with a cheesy grin.

'Daisuke and I have… gotten together,' Ken told Wormmon, setting him back on the bed and getting up to take hold of Daisuke's hand. 'My mother didn't like it at first, but she's ok now.'

'You and Daisuke?' Wormmon asked amusedly. 'That's a surprise. When did this happen?'

'Just now, before Ken ran out,' Daisuke answered. 'Now we'd appreciate it if you, er…'

'Left you two in peace?' Wormmon finished, a hint of laughter in his voice. 'Gladly.'

The little worm jumped off the bed and nudged open the door.

'I'll go and find out what your mother's cooking for dinner tonight,' he said to Ken before crawling out the door and letting it click behind him.

'And it was down to two,' Daisuke murmured, turning his attention to Ken.

Ken.

Ken-chan.

His Ken-chan.

Forever.