Occurs directly after Betrayal. If you have not read or finished reading the fourth book of the Cainsville Series, please do not go further – SPOILERS.
All rights to characters, places, and story themes belong to the author of the Cainsville Series, Kelley Armstrong. I am merely borrowing them.
It was passed midnight when Ricky dropped Olivia off at Grace's, the roar of his bike was loud enough to wake up the whole town. She didn't care, she was just glad to be home. Their weekend had been cut short when Don called with urgent club business. She and Ricky has been away on a week long trip that was supposed to be filled with riding, and sex. It would have been amazing had it not been for Ricky's decision to step back from their relationship. This decision hadn't come to light during their trip, no, the trip was supposed to be a celebration - one last hurray - before they split, amicably. It would have been amicable too, if she had been a little selfish, and took time to mourn their relationship, and find her own way to be friends with a guy who drives you crazy. How do you go on a sex trip with a guy who you know wants to break up with you, Olivia thought to herself when Ricky proposed the idea. But he needed it, and she understood why. So she went - for him.
She was caught in a mystical love triangle. Or that's how Olivia thought of it to simplify it. She, Ricky, and Gabriel, who wasn't just her boss, but her best friend, and Ricky's attorney. She would never tell Gabriel that he was her best friend, he would recoil at the idea, but he was, none the less.
As she entered her apartment, TC came running to greet her. He rarely acted like a normal pet cat, but sometimes he did, just to throw her off. She debated on calling Gabriel to let him know that she would be in to the office in the morning, but as she looked out her window, she realized Rose's light was still on. Without thinking, she dialled Rose's number instead.
Rose answered on the third ring, which meant she wasn't expecting a call, but she hadn't been sleeping either.
"Olivia? I heard the bike, you're not supposed to be home for a few more days... What happened?" Rose was a psychic, and usually knew when something was up, but, Olivia thought to herself, in this case it wouldn't be too difficult to deduce that something was wrong.
"Ricky and I broke up." Was all she could say.
"Well don't just stand in your window all melancholy, come over, I'll have the whiskey poured before you get out your front door. Just come on in, the door is unlocked."
It only took a few minutes for Olivia to get to Rose's, she did only live across the street, but by the time she got there, there was already a tumbler of whiskey sitting on the end table next to her favourite seat. Rose pulled Olivia into a hug when she entered the living room. She was the only person living in Cainsville who wouldn't jump for joy that "that boy" was gone. He wasn't gone, however. They were still friends; he just wouldn't be sharing her bed anymore.
"Tell me everything." Was all Rose said as she let Olivia go. Olivia took a big swig from her glass before saying anything. Rose would be the only resident in this town to get the full story, she thought. Rose wasn't just a kindly neighbor, she was Gabriel's aunt, and Olivia hoped she could give her some advice on how to break the news to her nephew.
"It happened the night before we left. Ricky had set up a special treat for me - champagne, chocolates - he said it was to celebrate us. Instead, it was a goodbye. He talked about how much he loved me, and how he never wanted to lose me..." Rose huffed here, "and then he started talking about how what he did wasn't fair to Gabriel... How he checked with Gabriel before asking me out, but knew Gabriel was lying when he said he was ok with it." Olivia had to take another gulp of whiskey there. Ever since the break up, the mere mention of his name, let alone the thought of him made her spine tingle. "He said it wasn't fair to me either. That I had to choose, and he knew I wouldn't as long as we were together. And that it would be easier on him when I did choose, if we were only friends. That's when he suggested the trip. One last adventure, filled with love, sex, and riding."
"That boy!" Rose exclaimed. "He's a sly one. Does he really expect to lose you? And even if you didn't choose him, you guys are destined to be a part of each other's lives. He just didn't want your last romantic thoughts of him to be the break up. What a selfish, arrogant..."
"Rose!" Olivia cut in, half laughing. She knew what Rose meant to say, she had already had the same thoughts, and had moved passed the anger, right into the guilt. "He right, it isn't fair. I wouldn't have been able to break it off myself, I care for him too much, and that's not fair to him. If we were still together, and I chose him, he'd always wonder if I actually wanted to, or just didn't want to hurt him. And if we were still together if I didn't choose him... I don't even want to think of how much THAT would hurt him. Not only that, but what about Gabriel!? I know his feelings are different, but it would still hurt him, right, if I chose Ricky when I was still dating him? He would always wonder what would have happened if circumstances were different, wouldn't he? Damn it, I hate this so much!"
"That's why God invented whiskey. Let me get you another glass." Rose understood that she didn't need advice, she just needed to talk out what was swirling around in her head - Ricky or Gabriel. Rose knew she couldn't interfere, but she was biased, after all. Gabriel loved Olivia just as much, or more than Ricky, and it was hard for Rose to see her nephew struggle to watch the first, and possibly only person he ever loved be with someone else.
Olivia sat in silence for a while mulling through her thoughts. How was she going to let Gabriel know that she and Ricky were no longer together? She didn't want to outright say it, she knew him well enough that if she surprised him with the news, he wouldn't react. Maybe she could work up to it.
She spent the night at Rose's, partly because it was so late once they finished the whiskey, and partly because she didn't want to spend the night alone. It had been months since she had spent a night in an empty apartment by herself. If she wasn't with Ricky, she was with Gabriel. As she laid in bed, she tried to remember the last times she had spent alone with both men, comparing the evenings. Not the activities or entertainment, but how she felt with them. Ricky was an open book to her. He was generous and considerate, he would never hide his feelings or opinions from her - he made her feel loved, and she was 100% comfortable with him. Gabriel was also generous and considerate. He voiced his opinions loudly and frequently to her, but kept his feelings hidden. Emotion was not something Gabriel Walsh was comfortable experiencing, let alone sharing. She knew him though, and was just as comfortable with him. As for how he made her feel? That was harder to pin down. He made her feel... special - not in a "stop eating the paste" kind of way, most of the time at least, but in a way that let her know that he appreciated her, and enjoyed spending time with her. Every time he shared a part of him, she felt like the luckiest person in the world - like she had won a grand prize that no one else had. She doubted even Rose knew about the cases of stew and coke he had hidden in his apartment. And god knows he would never set up a house for anyone else. She pictured him in a department store picking out throw pillows for her reading nook, and smiled.