Yu-Gi-Oh! The Tale of the Inflatable Hammer
Written for Lunnaei and DragonDancer5150, they're the ones who came up with the whole hammer idea!
Yu-Gi-Oh still does not belong to me. I do own an inflatable hammer and two or three inflatable swords.
This can be read as a stand-alone fic, but events that occurred in "The Wrong Card" and "Principal's Office" will be mentioned here.
It had been a fun day at the amusement park, plenty of rides, food, and games. True to his title as "King of Games", Yugi had won an impressive array of plush animals that he gallantly presented to Anzu and Shizuka. Honda and Jonouchi had spent much of the day doing battle with a pair of giant inflatable hammers.
The sun had dropped below the horizon when the gang finally boarded a bus for the ride home. The Spirit of the Puzzle sensed his tired partner drifting off to sleep, and quietly moved into control of the body, lifting his head from Anzu's shoulder, who was dozing next to him. Gazing out the window through half-lidded eyes, he idly listened to Jonouchi and Honda whispering in the seats behind him. While he couldn't actually make out what was being said, the constant snickering led him to believe they were up to no good, again. He only hoped they wouldn't need rescu- A flash of color reflected in the bus window caught the Spirit's attention.
BAM- SQUEAK!
Oh no, that did NOT just happen! There is no way Jonouchi would dare-
BAM-SQUEAK!
Apparently he would, especially with Honda egging him on… The spirit kept watch through the bus window. One more time, just try it ONE more time, you two…
BAM-SQUE-"HEY!"
Timing his move to the second, Other Yugi grabbed and yanked the annoying toy clean out of Jonouchi's grasp. While he no longer shattered the souls of people who so much as looked at him the wrong way, there was no reason he needed to put up with THIS nuisance! Calling on the power of the Puzzle, he opened a portal into the shadows. His friend could have the blasted noisemaker back from the Shadow Realm when they got home. Unfortunately, that was the precise moment that Jonouchi leaned over the seat to grab his hammer back.
"NO! Jonouchi, wait-!"
Too late…
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It was cold, and dark, and for Jonouchi it was all too familiar. He was in the Shadow Realm.
"Man oh man, way to overreact, Other Yuge! Some people just CAN'T take a joke!"
And as if the situation wasn't bad enough, something was moving in the shadows, moving straight toward him. Running was pointless, where would he run TO? He had no magic, no weapon save a stupid inflatable hammer. (He could just imagine battling the Reaper of Cards with THAT!) Still, he wasn't going down without a fight! Maybe one good swing would buy him some time to get away…
Something very big stopped before him. A hand reached for him. Closing his eyes, he swung the hammer for all he was worth.
BAM-SQUEAK! BAM- SQUEAK! BAM- SQUEAK! SQUEAK- SQUEAK-SQUEAK- SQUEEEAK!!!
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Something had gone wrong. Dark Magician could sense Pharaoh's anxiety as well as the frightened soul that was surely the cause of that anxiety. The soul's aura seemed familiar to him- this was someone he had met before perhaps? If so, it would be easier to guide the lost one safely out of the shadows. He knew Pharaoh wanted this done quickly before Master Yugi awoke!
There! There was the lost one! He reached out in a gesture of reassurance- And pulled back hastily as the other swung a very odd weapon (?) at him, again, and again, and again. What vaguely resembled an oversized mallet was having no effect against his armor, although that squeaking WAS becoming annoying..!
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Jonouchi kept swinging until his arms gave out in exhaustion. Hunched over, sides heaving for air, he finally became aware of the fact that he wasn't dead, soulless, or traveling down something's digestive tract. His relief was short-lived however as he looked up and recognized what- no, who- was standing before him. The last time they had met, Jonouchi had accidentally played an inappropriate if still legal equipment card. And Jonouchi had a sinking feeling that Dark Magician had NOT forgotten about the Horn of the Unicorn…
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It was a quiet afternoon at the Kame Game Shop. Grandpa Mouto had closed the shop for an afternoon tea break, and Dark Magician was enjoying a rare opportunity to assume a human form and visit with an old friend. For once there was no threat to his masters or their friends or the world at large. Yugi (And perforce the pharaoh), were at the house of instruction along with their friends, and Jonouchi was being VERY well behaved indeed.
As he sipped his tea, the shadow mage idly waved the hammer around, tapping it lightly on the floor. Crouched on the table, an orange tabby kitten watched the colorful toy bamming and squeaking around the floor. Unable to resist the temptation, the mighty orange hunter leaped off the table, claws extended…
BAM! SQUEEESSSSHHHHH…
Grandpa Mouto and the Dark Magician gazed at the rapidly- deflating hammer, then looked at each other. Finally, Dark Magician raised an elegant eyebrow.
'"The enemy has been defeated."
The End