Four men, four very senior officers, were conversing loudly in one of the rec rooms. It was empty save the tables and the surprisingly tasty food sitting in front of them. There was laughter emanating from three of the four and a slightly amused look on the face of the other as they discussed their most rebellious or amusing tales from their pasts. Once Scotty had finished retelling his anecdotes from his humble home in Scotland, which worryingly enough featured far more references to his ending up dressed in women's clothing than anyone cared to point out, they each looked to Jim.

"Oh. My turn, huh?" exchanging an amused smirk with Bones, the Enterprise's captain decided to retell the story of his 'well intentioned' excursions with a set of twins from the UK. "...I was like 19, what was I supposed to do?"

"You could have tried... I don't know...not to do it!" Bones put in gleefully.

"Captain, if this story is indeed true, would you not have earned a stay in a local jail?" This, the three full-blooded earthlings found even more amusing than the story that preluded it.

"Boy, you really don't know the half of it! Jim's been in jail more times than I can- ow! What?"

"Bones is exaggerating. I may have been inside a few times, but never for more than a night or two."

"Yeah, cuz they threw you out!"

"That statement is highly illogical, doctor... If given the opportunity I see no reason-"

"relax Spock, its a joke." Jim kicked his medical officer a second time. "So... you got any rebellious tales?"

"Besides choosing Starfleet?" They had to smile.

"Yes, besides that."

"I am sure you could pull up my entire record should you wish, Captain."

"Yeah, but I'm asking. Come on, how much did you get into trouble on Vulcan?"

"27 times since entering adolescence." They gaped.

"Twenty seven times?"

"You counted?"

"By the fact that each of these could have found their way onto my-"

"Wait... since adolescence? How about before?"

"I do not feel this is the most productive use of our time... I haven't the time to go into the logistics of each event as I am due on the bridge in 3 minutes. Captain, Doctor, engineer." He nodded to each of them before swiftly leaving the room. There was a moment of silence between the 3 men remaining and before long they each had the same thought on their mind.

"We gonna pull his records?"

"Oh yeah." the movement of the officers was simultaneous as they huddled around the small computer on the wall. "Captain James Tiberious Kirk."

"Voice recognised."

"Computer, pull the records of Commander Spock- everything on the database." The computer complied and they were met with everything that had been reported on Spock in reverse chronological order. Commendation...commendation... self demotion due to emotional compromise... battlefield promotion... commendation... they skipped through seven years worth of commendations before they found a cluster of ...interesting finds. Spocks first year at Starfleet... he had been involved in several altercations... but this wasn't what they were looking for. These were attacks, attacks on him. This they did not want to see, however they found themselves unable to stop themselves from pulling the most recent of the cluster they saw.

Stardate 2251.47

officer- Lt. Daniel Harrison

At roughly 2 hours after morning lectures I came upon 5 students, named below, attacking a fellow student. Spock, whose next of kin have been notified, suffered from multiple fractures and a severe concussion. The offending students have been handed over to the appropriate authorities.

Following reading the report, none of the men were laughing. Quite the opposite. Instead Kirk disengaged the computer and shut down Spock's records and the three officers solemnly returned to their stations.

"Report." Jim muttered as he made his way to his chair.

"Nothing new, Captain." Spock raised an eyebrow as he observed the captain. Had he not been jovial when he had departed? "Captain, is there anything bothering you?"

"Hmn? Oh, Spock. n... no. Everything's fine. Just trying to imagine what trouble you could have possibly caused as a child." he tried to laugh. But it was all wrong.


Wow... I didnt start this fic like this... hmmnn... do you think Freud would have something to say? You're right, probably not...