"REGINA! PUT MY MOTHERS HEART BACK IN HER CHEST OR SO HELP ME!"

"WHAT'RE YOU GONNA DO, SPANK ME?"

Regina ran down the street while pulling behind her Henry's old wagon that contained snows heart. It was Cora's birthday and at the party there had been alchohol; which was no surprise to anyone considering Cora was a drunk. First Regina had drank a glass of wine, and the next thing you know she was dancing on the table with Snow White, topless. Snow had accidentily knocked Regina off the table and then Snow found her heart being run down the street in the back of a red wagon.

It was quite the sight to see, Regina running down the street in a black lace bra and a pair of skinny jeans & Snow following in a pair of jeans and no top at all. Half the town was both apalled and amused at the sight and did nothing to stop it.

"REGINA GIVE ME BACK MY HEART!" Snow screamed while frantically running to catch up to Regina as she poofed farthur and farthur up the street.

"YOU CANT TOUCH THIS! WOAHHHHHHH. YOU CANT TOUCH THIS!" Regina screamed while standing on top of the red wagon, swaying to the imaginary music.

"DONT GO BREAKIN' MY HEART!" Snow yelled at the top of her lungs, stopping to dance at her own imaginary tune before realizing Regina still had her heart and began running to catch up as Regina screamed once again.

"FIRE BURNING. FIRE BURNING ON THE DANCE FLOOR." as this was said, fire erupted from Regina's fingertips; sending her flying down the street on the wagon even faster than before.

Emma stood in disbelief as she watched the scene unravel before her, turning to Cora who was chuckling to herself. "Regina didn't even drink that much!" Cora laughed even harder when Granny came over and gave Emma a pat on the shoulder "There may or may not have been weed in the cake I made for Cora."

"WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK GRANNY!?" With that Emma departed, once again running after her mother & girlfriend who were topless, high AND drunk.

"WOAH, WOAH, WOAH ITS MAGGGGGIIIICCC YANNOOOO!" Regina belted out as she rolled down the street at 50 miles per hour.

"GINA! YOUR GOING TOO FAST! SLOW THE FUCK DOWN AND GIVE MY MOTHER HER HEART BACK!"

"THEY SEE MY ROLLIN', THEY HATIN', PATROLLIN' AND TRYING TO CATCH ME RIDIN' DIRTY!" Regina began, and this time there was actually music playing as she sang.

"HOLY FUCK NO!" Emma screamed in disbelief as music reached her ears.

"Should we do something to stop this?" Granny whispered to Cora, chuckling as she did so.

"Nah, it'll be good for my daughter to let go a little bit." She whispered in reply, not knowing that her daughter had somehow heard her.

"LET IT GOOOOOOOOO, LET IT GOOOOOOOO." She screamed and suddenly ran into a mailbox.

"WHAT THE FUCK." Regina let out before she flipped over the mailbox and landed on the concrete, on her stomach. Resulting in hurting herself.

"BABY!" Emma screamed as she jumped over the mailbox in some karate move that she had somehow learned.

"EMMA IT HURTS!" She screamed as she rolled over, her hands cupping her own breasts. "I THINK I BROKE MY BOOBS, OH GOD IT HURTS!" As this was screamed, Emma noticed her girlfriends bloody stomach and the tears rolling down her face.

"Shhh, calm down-" Emma attempted but was cut off.

"HOW ABOUT YOU ALMOST COMPLETELY FLATTEN YOUR BOOBS AND THEN I TELL YOU TO CALM DOWN, JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP EMMA SWAN!"

Emma pressed her hands over Regina's; on her breasts. Using her magic to heal her loves stomach and 'bruised' breasts.

"EMMA SWAN DONT GROPE YOUR GIRLFRIEND IN PUBLIC NO ONE WANTS TO SEE IT." Snow screamed from behind them.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU PASTY WHITE BITCH!" Emma screamed back as she wiped her girlfriends tears.

"WHERE IS MY HEART!?" As soon as the words left her mouth she saw it and ran to grab it but Regina wouldn't give up that easy.

"I think its a good time to intervene, my darling." Cora spoke as she squeezed Granny's hand.

"Will do, does your noble knight get a good luck kiss before the battle?" She spoke as she looked back to Cora. She obliged and gave her a quick kiss before releasing her hand.

"STOP KISSING WOMEN GRANNY!" Ruby screamed from the steps of the diner.

"NO YOU STOP KISSING GUYS RUBY!" She countered as she ran over to Snow and Regina, slapping them both in the face and grabbing Snow's heart.

"I WIN BITCHES!" She screamed, running back to her girlfriend. Giggling as she handed the heart to Cora.

"Here, Snow." Cora stated calmly handing Snow her heart.

"WHAT THE FUCK MOM!?" Regina screamed at her mother.

"IMMA BOSS ASS BITCH BITCH BITCH. IMMA BOSS ASS BITCH." Granny screamed in glee because she had managed to get Snow's heart without much effort.

"Yes you are dear." Cora gushed before turning to her daughter "GET OVER IT, EVIL PANDA!" And with that, Cora poofed away with her girlfriend.

"Here." Emma handed Regina her blouse and she slipped it on.

"Im tired, lets go home." Regina said as she walked home with her girlfriend, wobbling the whole way.

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They finally managed to get home, incredibely fast given Regina's state. Whatever that state was anyway, her being both drunk and high.

"Emma, 'm tired" Regina slurred as they stepped over the threshold of the mansion.

"Baby, you can't be that tired." Emma tried to talk her out of going to sleep. To be honest, they had both been busy and it'd been almost a full week since they'd been able to have sex. It was driving Emma absolutely insane.

"But I 'm! Please, Em." She was begging, and Emma could tell she was tired; Regina rarely ever begged her. But despite that, she couldn't let her chance at sex get away. Emma was thinking it could be better for Regina than sleeping, considering she was so intoxicated it would make it more hightened for her.

She was pulled from her thoughts as Regina made a move to pull away, but before she could she was yanked by the arm and pushed roughly up against the wall. Soft pink lips found plump red ones in a bruising kiss, eliciting a moan from the brunette as she found Emma's tounge exploring her mouth.

Regina let out a small whimper as she found the blonde's thigh in between her own, pressed up against her throbbing core. As she moved to deepen the kiss, Emma pulled away; making her whimper once again.

"Not so tired now, are you 'Gina?" She said with a smirk; seeing she had managed to talk the brunette into screwing her senseless without actually talking to her.

"Shut up, and sleep with me. Why dont you sleep with me, shut up and sleep with me." Regina started to sing and swaying again to the imaginary music.

Emma just chuckled deeply at her extremely intoxicated girlfriend, before grabbing her hand and pulling her upstairs. "As you wish, madame mayor." She stated seductively as they made their way to their bedroom.

Regina stumbled most of the way upstairs but they finally made their way to the bedroom. Once there Emma shoved Regina up against the door and tugged at the blouse she was wearing. She was too impatient; grabbing the silky material and ripping it off of her love. She heard the 'pop' of buttons and mentally cursed herself because once Regina was sane again; she'd kill her for ruining her blouse.

But as she was pressed up against the door by the blonde, nothing mattered except stripping themselves of thier clothing; both of them eager to feel skin against skin. Emma couldn't manage to get her jeans off fast enough so Regina just poofed them away for the both of them; leaving them in only thier bra's & panties.

Emma took in the sight of her girlfriend pressed up against the door, and licked her lips. Diving in the kiss the beautiful brunette, slipping her tounge into her mouth and twisting it with Regina's. As she pulled away, she moved to kiss any exposed flesh. Moving to her neck, biting it & soothing it with her tounge, moving lower she reached behind Regina and unclasped the lacy bra.

Moving to one of the mounds of exposed flesh, she took a hardened bud into her mouth; swirling her tounge around it. At this, Regina arched into her, trying hard to catch her breath.

"Oh, Emma.. dont stop." It was breathless, but loud enough to make its way to the blonde's ears and she didn't need to be told twice. Playing a bit more with the hardened buds, she moved down her body; leaving a trail of hot, wet kisses every inch of the way.

Emma finally made her way to the lacy thong Regina was sporting ever so nicely. Taking the thin strap on her hip in between her teeth and dragging it down her leg until she was completely exposed. Gripping the back of Regina's thighs she began to kiss the inside of the perfectly toned skin, teasing her love.

"Emma." It was a single word, but it was a demand. It was the fact that the voice had been trembling that made her decide to ignore it. She was in charge, and she was going to show the brunette that it was going to be her calling the shots in this moment. She brought out her tounge, teasing Regina's entrance, sampling her.

"Emma, oh, please.." At this the blonde chuckled and looked up, locking eyes with the brunette. "I dont know what you want, Regina" her voice was low and she could see how anxious Regina was; her eyes gave away everything.

"I want you." It was a whimper, she was trembling with arousal and needed to let go.

"Where?" The blonde replied almost instantly, loving to tease her but wanting to taste her just as much as Regina wanted release.

"Inside of me." Emma had been ready, her grip had never left the back of the olive toned thighs. As soon as those three words had left Regina's mouth, Emma drove her tounge into the brunette's throbbing heat. Her tounge thrusting inside Regina as fast and hard as she could manage, tasting her love's arousal as she did so.

Regina had been on the edge from the beginning, and Emma had been right. Being intoxicated had definitely hightened everything. As Emma's tounge thrust into her she found her self releasing low moans between her desperate intakes of air; she was closer to release each time Emma's tounge thrust inside her.

"E-Emma... oh god, i-im so-" But she never finished her sentance as her orgasm ripped through her, finally finding her release. The thought of Emma writhing in pleasure like she was had sent her over the edge.

"Emma!" It was the only sound as Regina came, her scream filling the room.

Emma found nothing more satisfying than Regina's juices on her tounge, lapping up everything she could get as Regina was writhing in pleasure. She helped her ride out her orgasm, her body trembling, and then finally going limp against the door. They had never even made it to the bed. Regina leaned all her weight onto the door, her chest heaving.

As she finally found her voice, she smirked.

"I guess its my turn now, Sherriff." At this she poofed them onto the bed and made to have her way with the beautiful blonde beneath her.

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Cora sat at the bar in her girlfriends diner, watching her cook. Her daughter was at home with her girlfriend, her grandson was at a friends and she didn't have the energy to really taunt anyone at the moment. So what she settled for was watching her girlfriend.

"Stop staring at my ass, Cora." Granny's voice pulled her out of her thoughts. "You'll get to stare enough later, but for now im on the job." She said shortly, leaving no room for discussion.

"But, LOVEEEEEE!" Cora whimpered, using her puppy eyes to try and get her way with her girlfriend. But Granny wouldn't budge.

"Sorry, darling. But no." Granny said giving Cora a quick kiss and walking away.

"GRANNY STOP KISSING WOMEN!" Ruby screamed from one of the nearby tables. Still hating the sight of Granny and Cora kissing, even though they'd been together for about a year.

"NO YOU STOP KISSING GUYS!" Was the reply coming from another table as she handed somone they're food.

Just then, in walked Hook and Hood. Both dressed in thongs and pink bra's, which no one ever understood but didn't question. It had become their normal attire since they had come out to the citizens of Storybrooke.

"BEST FRIEND!" Cora squeled like a 5 year old and hugged Hook, who hugged back before Hood spoke up.

"Do I get a 'hello'?" He said a bit annoyed, to this day Cora never liked him even though he was Hook's lover. Cora thought that he didn't deserve her best friend, but it wasn't her choice.

"No, you don't. BECAUSE YOUR AN UPTIGHT LITTLE BITCH!" She screeched out of nowhere and sat down, not saying anything else on the matter.

"WHY THE FUCK AM I HEARING MY MOTHER SCREAMING AT A LITTLE BITCH!?" A thick english accent screeched from behind as Zelena walked in looking confused. Ruby saw Zelena & went right back into the kitchen, Zelena was who Ruby swooned over but she was too freaked out to say anything. She also didn't know that Zelena reciprocated those feelings.

"Hook came in with Hood & you know how they hate each other." Granny said shortly before calling into the kitchen "RUBY COME TAKE ZELENA'S ORDER!"

Ruby stalked out of the kitchen nervously and walked over to woman who now sat at one of the tables. "Can I get you anything?" She asked timidly, terrified of slipping up.

"Yeah, I want you at my house tonight in something comfortable." Zelena handed her a piece of paper with her number just in case "I cant wait to make you howl for me." she practically growled this and Ruby's face went a deep shade of red. Zelena was not one to be subtle.

"BITCH HAS GOT GAME!" Cora yelled and high-fived her daughter before Zelena strut out of the diner. Making Ruby stare, and practically drool over her ass.

"IM NOT GONNA BE THE ONLY ONE IN THIS FAMILY KISSING WOMEN ANYMORE!" Granny screamed at her and laughed, walking back into the kitchen.

"SHUT UP GRANNY!" Ruby yelled angrily once Zelena was outside the diner, but once Granny walked into the kitchen Ruby got up on the top of a table and screamed.

"I HAVE A DATE WITH THE EXTREMELY HOT ZELENA MILLS!" She pumped her fist in the air and danced around until Granny came out of the doors.

"Look, dear, im happy for you but get off the damn table. Go take a break and get ready for your date." She said with a small smile as her grandaughter squealed in glee and ran into the back of the B&B.

"Seems that this could get really messed up." Cora said to no one inparticular; thinking about how wierd it was that her daughter was going to be dating her girlfriend's grandaughter.

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"Wow." Was all Emma Swan could breathe out, she was pretty sure Regina had made her cum at least 4 times in the past hour or two.

Regina crawled up her girlfriend's body, laying partly on top of her as she nipped at Emma's neck. "I'll take that as a compliment, darling." she spoke with a chuckle.

But before Emma could say anything to reply, a certain woman walked through the door in a green dress and black heels. Sporting a gleeful smile.

"Sis, you'll never- OH MY GOD CLEAN YOUR SELVES UP YOU SEX DEVILS!" She screeched in her thick accent.

"To be fair, you did walk into our bedroom." Regina said with a smirk as she fully clothed herself and the blonde next to her. "So whats up, Zelena?"

"I ASKED RUBY OUT!" She screamed happily and tackled her little sister because she couldn't contain her excitement.

"Thats great, Z!" Regina screamed happily for her sister, it had taken a while but she'd finally redeemed herself and she had been practically drooling over the she-wolf from the beginning.

"Im worried, I told her to come to my house tonight in something comfortable. I DONT EVEN OWN ANYTHING COMFORTABLE!" She screamed with worry this time "That's why I came to you, I need to borrow something sexy but comfortable."

"Alright, well. Get off of me and i'll get you something." Zelena climbed off of her and Regina walked into her closet, returning with a green shirt and white skinny jeans.

"Thank you! Your a life saver, Regi!" She spoke, a smile plastered on her face as she hugged her sister and poofed out of the room.