Raoul's Story
Disclaimer: Don't own POTO or Lemony Snicket or Hitchhiker's Guide or whatever else I may have mentioned. I don't own Time Waits for no Mouse either, but I didn't mention that so I don't even need to talk about it, but I did anyhow. Ta-ta!
Hi. I is Raoul. I is in love with a pretty girl. She is my love. I love her. She is loveable. Get it?
I'm not a dumb as I sounds. I'm actually very inte… inttel… how do you spell it? Ok, I'll say smart. I is really! Don't laugh! Stop laughing at me! I command it!
Ok, now I have a story:
Once there was Christine and I loved her. Then there was Erik, and he smells like when you enter a, um, what's that word? He smells like when you go into a funeral home. I don't like it. Then there was music. I don't understand it. I do play violin, but people say I sound like Vice-principal Nero –who ever that is! Then there was Meg, and she was um, Meg. And there was this guy named Leroux, but he's not important. Mostly, there was me and Christine. I don't know why the story was called the PHANTOM of the Opera, because I would like it better if it was called the Raoul of the Opera. Raoul is such a freakin' awesome name! Ok, where was I? Oh, yeah, and then there was a chandelier. It were pretty. And then Erik said something very insulting. I, I can not speak it! He, he, he, he, (why does this sound like I'm laughing?) he said I sounded like…. I will write it small: Sponge Bob. Why? I do NOT! Anyway, where was I? Ok, Christine was… pretty. Then there were fighting and junk. Let's skip that. Well go to my kissing scene. I kissed Christine. Smooch-y! Ok, and then I said stuff. Then there was more of that Erik guy. He's odd. I think he has a split personality problem. Wow! I spelt that LONG world right! Go me! And then… What's that Christine? I'm annoying you and Erik? Well, why can't I talk out loud when I right? 'Cause I'm a liar? What's that? I'm insulting you also? Well, sorry but if you two didn't tie me up maybe I could think better! Yeah, that it what I think! Hey! Stop that! I firmly command you to stop kissing that phantom! I don't care if you're married! What? I'm writing down everything I say? Huh? Oh, that's weird…
Note: This transcript was found in the hands of a wandering drunk who said he stole it from a foppish blond who was leaving the country to find his missing ballpoint pens.
Such randomness deserves reviews, eh? Please agree with me! Lol.