Authors Notes: First things first I would like to apologize for my previous stories that I never finished. I don't plan on discontinuing this. Constructive criticism and ideas are most appreciated. Thank you
Chapter 1: #4 Privet Drive the toothpick, the whales, and the boy"WAKE UP BOY"
Harry woke with a start, "who the hell", he muttered rubbing sleep from his eyes. "GET UP NOW", Harry covered his ears with his hands wishing the cat would just die already and stop screeching, "HARRY". Harry sat up in his cupboard confused, "since when do cats talk? Especially the dying ones", the screech came again, "GET UP THIS INSTANCE", he groaned realizing this was worse than a talking dying cat, "I'm up Aunt Petunia one second".
He felt around for his glasses and put them on. He opened the door and was faced with the walking toothpick, "Good Morning Aunt Petunia", he said brightly with a false smile plastered on his face.
Petunia glared nostrils flared, " What are you smiling at. Go and take a bath, I want you down in the kitchen making breakfast in 10 minutes ", after that oh so surprising announcement she retreated back into her liar, commonly known as the kitchen. Harry grinned at his musings and went to the bathroom.
Stepping out of the tub he stood in front of the mirror and inspected the bruises, " Healing well but I think I should stick to long sleeves for a while", he got dressed and went to the kitchen to make breakfast.
The moment breakfast was on the table the whales appeared. Vernon walked in first and Harry had to resist yelling out his uncle's true name. Shamoo. As his uncle sank into his chair Harry could not help put feel sorry for it. Although it was made out of steel with the strength to carry two people he knew that if it could talk it would scream, "ONLY TWO AT A TIME PLEASE". He shook his head in sympathy and looked up to see the second beached whale come in. Dudley grabbed his plate before he maneuvered himself into the chair. Now this chair was only made out of wood and made to carry the average sized person and Harry wondered when it would give up on life. He turned back to washing the frying pan when a laud crack made him turn around in surprise. The chair must have heard his question and decided that today was the day. Two of its legs had snapped right off sending Dudley tumbling to the floor, where he rolled around like a gigantic yoga ball unable to get up.
Harry held back the laughter bubbling inside him. "SNORT". He looked around trying to figure out where on earth that laud explosion came from.
His eyes stopped on his "family" who had stopped tying to help Dudley stand and saw them glaring at him, "Oh crap". Uncle Vernon's face turned a deep purple telling Harry one thing…RUN.
Living with the Dursleys since he was a baby had taught Harry where to hide from his uncle to escape a serious beating. If he hid well enough and his uncle could not find him Vernon, would swear and rave then leave the house for the day and come back still raving but drunk as hell. After he had left the house Aunt Petunia, would go and stay in a hotel for the night with Dudley to escape a drunk Vernon.
With the gap he had placed between them by leaving the kitchen first, Harry ran upstairs to Dudley's room and hid with years of junk under the bed, the one place his uncle never checked or more like could not check. Years of zero exercise have restricted Vernon from not only seeing is feet but bending down.
He heard the slam of doors as Vernon attempted to find him. Then five minutes later, he heard the slam of the front door and the house was quiet. Harry could not help but grin. He was not 5 anymore and he sure as hell was not going to fall for that. As expected 5 minutes later, his uncle roared in anger, slammed the front door and drove off.
Harry waited and soon enough Dudley came to his room to pack clothes for his stay in the hotel. After Dudley left the room Harry waited 10 minutes then went downstairs. He sighed realizing they were really gone the dashed to the phone, made a quick call, packed some clothes and left the house.
First chapter here sorry for any grammar issues and please do not hesitate to point them out to me. Thank you