Through My Eyes
A/N: Contains a spoiler or two from Series 4. This idea came from a tumblr prompt. There's no smut, per se, but it's rated T just to be safe. Thank you, as always, to SashaElizabeth, my darling beta!
"No, not this one, either," Cora sighed, slightly exasperated. The time was now 7:45pm, and she still wasn't dressed for dinner. Baxter had brought and helped Cora into five different dresses since the dressing gong had gone, and Cora had turned up her nose at all of them. "At this stage, I should just have a tray here in my room," she muttered under her breath.
Baxter didn't want to overstep her mark by inquiring about Lady Grantham's mood. Without a word, she stepped over to the armoire and retrieved a sixth dress. It was the most beautiful shade of midnight blue, with silver beading in intricate designs across the front of the bodice. It was a bit more fitted at the waist than some of her more recent purchases, and the hemline fell just above her ankles. The color set off Cora's dark hair and pale skin exquisitely, and made her blue eyes shine even brighter. Cora smiled as Baxter slipped it over her head. It was one of Robert's favorites. However, as soon as she turned toward the cheval mirror that stood in the corner of her bedroom, her face fell. She hated the way it looked on her. It had been a while since she had last worn it. Did it look this awful on me the last time?, she thought to herself. Not having the time to change again, she turned to Baxter and nodded. "Yes, I'll wear this one tonight. If you would be so kind as to fetch the shoes that go with it and my gloves…"
"Of course, milady," Baxter said. "I'll be back shortly." With a small curtsey, she exited the room. Cora sank into the chair at her vanity and put her head in her hands just as Robert entered from his dressing room. His face lit up as he noticed that his wife wore one of his favorite dresses. However, his features fell just as quickly as he observed that Cora was crying. He could hear her muffled sobs through her hands. Alarmed, he walked over to where she sat and knelt down beside her. "My darling, whatever's the matter?" he inquired.
"Nothing. Go away," came Cora's muffled reply. "Don't look at me, Robert."
"There's no use in lying to me, my dear. What is going on?" Cora raised her head, and turned to look at her husband. Her eyes were red and bore a heart-wrenching sadness. Before she could answer, Baxter returned with her shoes and gloves. Cora quickly wiped at her eyes, sniffling a bit as she fought to regain her composure. Robert stood up and allowed Baxter to finish her work. As he waited, he noticed the pile of discarded dresses that lay atop the bed. His brow furrowed in confusion, but he said nothing.
"Thank you for all of your help, Baxter. That will be all until tonight," Cora said as she turned to take one final look in the mirror as Baxter once again exited the room. She turned to Robert. "Shall we go down?"
"Not until you tell me what's going on, Cora. Why were you crying when I came in?"
"I told you. It's nothing. We had better get downstairs. It's almost time for dinner to be served. It's not fair on Mrs. Patmore if we're late."
"Very well," Robert acquiesced. "But, I expect a full explanation later." Cora said nothing as she slipped her hand into the crook of Robert's arm.
Robert observed Cora throughout dinner. She was more quiet than usual, and she barely touched her food. When asked what was wrong, she simply said, "I'm not hungry." She left the drawing room not long after Robert and Tom came through, saying that she had a headache. She gave Robert a chaste kiss on the cheek, and headed for the staircase. The family looked at Robert in confusion, silently wondering what was wrong. Shaking his head, he decided to follow Cora. As he stepped into the Great Hall, he saw her quickly ascending the stairs, her hand over her mouth in an attempt to stifle the sobs that were wracking her body. Robert's heart sank to see his wife in such a state. Now almost beside himself with worry, he followed her up the staircase.
Cora was already in her room by the time Robert reached the top of the stairs. She walked over to ring for Baxter just as Robert entered the room. "Don't ring for Baxter just yet." Robert's voice startled Cora. "Heavens! You scared me half to death, Robert!" she exclaimed, placing a hand over her rapidly beating heart.
"I do apologize, my dear. I want to talk to you for a moment, if that's alright."
"Please, Robert. I told you downstairs that I have a headache. I want nothing more right now than to have Baxter change me into my nightgown and to go to bed. Can't we just talk in the morning?" Cora knew what Robert wanted to talk about, and it was a conversation she wasn't ready to have.
"You know that I don't like to argue with you, Cora. But, my dear, I cannot ignore what I witnessed when I entered your room tonight. I'm worried about you, darling. If there's something bothering you, I want to help. Please." Robert watched as Cora turned her back to him. Almost inaudibly, she mumbled, "My clothes don't look good on me anymore."
Robert blinked a couple of times, unsure he had heard her correctly. He made his way to the other side of the bed, and attempted to slip his arms around Cora's waist. He was taken aback when she pulled away from him. "Dearest, what has caused you to feel this way?"
Cora shrugged. "I know that the new fashions do not require that we wear corsets. Don't get me wrong; it's a welcomed change to be able to breathe. But, I don't like the way I look in my clothes without it."
"So, that's why all of these dresses are lying on the bed," Robert said, gesturing toward them. "My love, I've never seen you look anything but beautiful in anything you've ever worn."
Cora rolled her eyes. "There's no need to patronize me, Robert. Look at me. Can you honestly tell me that you believe me to be as beautiful now as I was thirty-three years ago when you married me?"
"No," Robert answered. "I-"
He was cut off before he could utter another word. "Well, that answers that question. You may sleep in your dressing room tonight." Cora turned and marched over to the bell cord. As she reached for it, Robert grabbed both of her hands and turned her to where they now stood face to face. "Cora, my darling, you didn't let me finish. No. You are not as beautiful as you were thirty-three years ago. You are even more so. You become more beautiful with every day that passes."
Cora lowered her eyes as she felt herself blush. Casting her husband a sideways glance, she replied, "You're only saying that so that I'll let you back in my bed." She turned her face from him, not wanting him to see the tears that once again filled her eyes. Robert put his hand under her chin, lifting her face so that he could look into her beautiful blue eyes. "Come over here, my love. I want to show you something." Slowly, she walked with him until he stood her in front of her mirror.
Cora turned her head, not wanting to look at her reflection. Robert's voice spoke from behind her. "Look in the mirror, Cora. Tell me; what do you see?" Begrudgingly, Cora turned to take in the sight before her. She wrinkled her nose slightly before answering, "Someone who looked better in a corset."
"That's not what I see," Robert whispered in her ear. Snaking one arm around Cora's waist, his other hand went to work removing the pins from her hair as he continued. "I see the most stunning woman that ever walked the Earth. A woman who has somehow managed to grow more youthful and beautiful with each passing year. The love of my life, the mother of my children, and a wife more wonderful than anything I ever could have asked for. I wish that you could see yourself through my eyes, my dearest one."
Cora leaned back to rest her head on Robert's shoulder. "Shakespeare did say that love is blind," she remarked, teasingly. Chuckling softly, Robert placed a gentle kiss on her cheek. "He did, but I am most certainly not." He walked around and stood in front of her, placing his hands on her shoulders. "It's not just your physical beauty that I see. That's only part of it. Your true beauty comes from here," Robert said as he put one hand over Cora's heart. "Everything about you is beautiful, Cora. Everything."
"I do love you so," Cora whispered as she put her arms around Robert's neck. Before he could answer, Cora crushed her lips into his, igniting a fire within them both. Bringing the hand that rested above her heart up to touch her face, Robert reached the other behind her back and began to undo the buttons to her dress. After releasing the last one, he broke the kiss long enough to step back and push the dress over Cora's shoulders and down onto the floor. Keeping his eyes locked with hers, he lifted her slip up over her knees to her waist. Without a word, she held up her arms allowing Robert to remove the garment and toss it aside. "See?" he inquired with a mischievous smirk. "This is so much easier when you're not wearing a corset."
For the first time all evening, Cora laughed. "You're incorrigible," she remarked as she worked quickly to rid Robert of his dinner jacket and bowtie before working on the buttons of his evening shirt. "Thank God for that." She looked at her husband lovingly. "For that, and for you. Thank God for you, Robert. My wonderful, darling husband."
"I love you so much, Cora," Robert said. "So very much. And, I intend to remind you every day just how beautiful you really are." With that, he lifted Cora into his arms and carried her to their bed, intent on making her feel more beautiful than he ever had before.