A/N: I know that a lot of people aren't going to be happy with me about this. But right now I'm just really angry at Steph for making Breaking Dawn turn out the way it did. Yeah, I expect flames.

Oh, and for those of you who don't have BD yet: SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! THIS IS A MAJOR FREAKING SPOILER, SEEING AS THIS IS THE BOOK BEING MADE FUN OF. SO, IN CASE YOU DIDN'T GET FROM THE TITLE, THIS IS A BREAKING DAWN PARODY AND IT HAS SPOLERS.

Just thought I'd get that clear.

On with it, though. I present the BREAKING DAWN PARODY.

LLLLL

Bella.

"Yes, Alice. OUCH! That hurt. Don't poke me."

"Alice…" A voice from the other side of the room cautiously spoke.

"Don't poke Charlie either. Why is it, Alice, that we have to do this?"

"Just go to your happy place, Bella." Alice's voice was, smooth as it was, starting to get on my nerves.

Well, not starting. It's been grating on every cell in my body since she arrived. With pins and monkey suits.

"Maybe I don't want to go to my happy place." Show her.

"You do too! Right now or I'll stab you with this pin!"

Well, it wasn't exactly a good idea for me to be stabbed. First, I would bleed. Then faint. And, when you think about it, fainting would not be good, as it would get stains on my dress.

There was also the whole vampire thing where Alice would suck my blood out. But, really, who cares?

Charlie sighed. "Do as she says, Bells. We might get through this sooner." Good point.

Close my eyes for my happy place…

I'm playing chess against Aro…

Crap. Happy place. Not nightmare. Try again, Bella!

I'm playing chess against Jasper…

Really. I need to get this right. This is another reason (which I'm going to rebuke later, of course) why I love that Edward can't read my mind. Having an almost happy place with Jasper. Golly gee.

I'm playing chess against Edward, in our meadow, and for some reason, I'm winning! Yes, FINALLY something I can do better than him! I move my, um, horse-y thingy diagonally from his, er…

Screw chess.

I didn't think it was possible, but I'm a part of a big Cullen love fest that includes Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper, Alice, and Edward, Carlisle, Esme, and me.

Yup. I'm so in my happy place.

LLLLL

Wow. That felt better than I expected it to. I probably won't continue this. Just letting you know, I'm a HUGE Twilight. I got through reading BD this morning (eaaaaaaaaaaarly this morning...I was at a BD release party), and I was so disappointed. Steph went against everything she had built for herself. She could have RUINED it all. Luckily enough, there are still the first three books and we can make up our own ending, thankyouverymuch.

Anyway, I'm about to reread Breaking Dawn to see if it makes me feel better or not. Please, flame me or review me, I want to see the reactions to Breaking Dawn.