You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You and the stranger both like Avengers.
You: Hi
Stranger: Hello
You: how are you?
Stranger: Good, you?
You: great thanks... My names Tony Stark... whats yours
Stranger: Tony, do you know who painted my bow 'pink' yesterday?!
You: Hmmm... no... was it me cuz I can't remember a lot of yesterday
Stranger: I won't even bother telling you to lay off the drinks. Anyway, announce to all the recruit agents to wear their amour in the halls today. It's going to be very fun for me.
You: Is this Loki?...cuz I am getting a hostile feeling...
Stranger: No. I just think that the recruits need to learn to stop painting everything I own pink. by tonight they will be covered in pink paint. *chuckle*
You: *snigger* I wonder why they would do such a thing. But i still can't guess who you are.
Stranger: .. Tony. Bow- Bow. You are drunk aren't you? It's Clint!
You: OHHHH hey Clint...
You: how are you?
Stranger: Very good. Except for the irritating little problem. So- how's Jarvis?
You: ummm... good as far as I can tell, or as good as a AI can be anyway
You: and why do you assume that when ever I talk to you, I'm drunk?
Stranger: Because you usually are...
You: that is not true!
You: I never drink and fly... hahaha drink and fly?... instead of drink and drive?...
You: get it?
Stranger: Yes, it is true. And I remember /someone/ telling me a story of a drunk Ironman incident.
You: was it rhode? or pepper?... I bet it was Rhode...
Stranger: Maybe...
You: ever since I gave him that iron suit...
Stranger: Yeah... So... err... anything else interesting going on?
You: well theres always something going on for me... but nothing you would be interested in... How are you and Tasha?... I bet you have 'fun' with her don't you
Stranger: ... That's none of your business...
You: Yes it is... I made it my business when I looked at your internet history. You haven't been looking at porn for a while so something else must be keeping your attention... if you know what i mean
Stranger: Yes, Target practice and the accident Banner had in the lab yesterday. You have no idea what pepper-spray does to that guy.
You: *sigh*... you're no fun... but i bet you are trying to avoid the conversation because Widow has been rejecting you... ohhhh well... look on the bright side... that lets cap have a go at her
You: all those muscles... i bet tasha won't turn him down
Stranger: You are very, very frustrating. Besides, isn't cap still moping about his old girlfriend?
You: Yeah but he has to learn to let go of her... tasha could teach him how to
Stranger: I think Tasha has to see this conversation.
You: I bet she won't deny it... hold on... if she sees it than... SHE MUST HE NEAR YOU! YOU ARE SLEEPING WITH HER! hahahaha i knew i would get it out of you some how
Stranger: I have nothing to say to that...
You: hahahahahaha they don't call me genius for nothing you know
Stranger: Some of us also call you and arrogant Jerk.
Stranger: For a nicer form or language
You: ohhhh touchy are we? I know what else your touching though!
Stranger: Tony, put down the booze reeeal slowly and go back to bed. now.
You: but what if i don't want to
Stranger: Then you are target practice for the next three weeks.
You: ...you have a bow and arrow... I have an awesome machine suit that i can pee in... who looks like the most obvious winner here?
Stranger: My arrows explode. And you can't wear that suit forever.
You: or can I?... i just said i could pee in it...
You: and you can't hold your bow forever
Stranger: Have fun eating with that helmet. And... yeah. But I can hide. You will be to drunk to think.
You: WHY DO YOU ASSUME I AM DRUCK ALLL THE TYME?
You: ...wow...
Stranger: Haha. because you /are/
You: no i'm not! only 40% of the time
Stranger: Yes. You spend the other 60% hungover or on your way to being drunk.
You: ...i hate you you know...
Stranger: Yes. The feeling could be considered mutual
You: But I have saved your ass
You: so you owe me
Stranger: Yes... Okay. Now I'm scared.
You: But its true!
Stranger: Bottle of vodka to settle it?
You: no...
You: I saved the whole worlds ass
Stranger: I helped.
You: yeah but with out me... you would be dead
Stranger: Yeah...
You: your acting as if you don't remember the bomb i flew into space with... I FLEW INTO SPACE TO SAVE YOUR ASS! YOU OWE ME!
Stranger: I know I do!
Stranger: You never let us forget!
You: ...so you can't use me as target practise...
You: and banner can't hulk out on me
You: and tasha owes me sex
Stranger: I'm telling pepper!
You: ...I never said i was going to have sex with her
You: i could always watch
Stranger: That's it. Watch your back. I'll be there in about- four minutes.
You: hehehehe... you don't even know where i am
Stranger: Stark Tower? I could always ask Pepper, Rhode, or Fury. I'm sure Banner could track you. And Natasha will happily help once she reads this.
You: Thst
You: that won't change the fact that she owes me big time
You: pepper won't tell you anywzy
Stranger: "Pepper. This is a highly classified problem. I must speak with tony on Fury's behalf. Where is he?" You saying she won't tell me?
You: ...not if i tell her not to tell anyone... especially is i sweeten the deal with one of my... well.. lets call them specialities
Stranger: I'll ask her before you can tell her.
You: no you wont
Stranger: Maybe I will..
You: you can't
You: she lives with me
Stranger: Fine.
Stranger: I won't track you down.
Stranger: I'll hide all your alcohol
You: ...you wouldn't...
Stranger: You have no idea what I would do.
Stranger: Maybe I'll even convince Cap and Fury to confiscate it whenever you buy more.
You: they can't do that!
Stranger: They probably could if they wanted.
You: how would they?
You: i don't think it is possible
You: and have you forgotten about me going out?
Stranger: Why not? They are members of SHIELD after all. And no... But have fun finding anything at home.
Stranger: And if you go out then I can target practice! Yes!
You: ...but you owe me... I thought we got that point straight already
Stranger: Yes I owe you. But whats a relationship without a little rivalry every now and then? *chuckle*
You: but killing me with an arrow seems like going a little too far
Stranger: I'm not going to kill you!
Stranger: You think I WANT to have to sit and talk to fury for hours?
You: maybe? you seem to have a little bit of bromance going on
Stranger: Have you been reading fanfiction?
Stranger: That's not a good thing to do when you're drunk.
You: hahahaha... no...but the intent are very graphic when it comes to you and widow
You: *internet
Stranger: I swear if you imply that again I WILL be tempted to kill you.
You: but i didn't think you wanted to send time with fury in that office of his... or maybe you do?
You: or sometimes they are graphic about you and steve
Stranger: I was baout to say the same thing. Tell me, whens the wedding date for you and Bruce?
Stranger: about*
You: never... i still don't understand their obsession with me and the hulk
Stranger: Oh, I also saw a you and Steve Fiction this morning/.
Stranger: And a Thor. People just love you!
You: oh what fun... but thoki is a bit weird if you ask me.. i have seen some of you and loki though... most of it is from when he hypnotised you and you did anything he wanted... like call out his name louder... and louder
Stranger: Shut up. Don't you dare joke about that.
You: why not?... does it get you excited?... I must tell tasha about this... dress up as loki and you will do anything to please her
Stranger: It was one of the most terrifying moments of my life- hateful. Don't joke about it.
You: ohhhh so scary is what you like eh?... kinky really... must tell her about that as well
Stranger: I'll punch you next time I see you.
Stranger: Promise
You: next time will be with me amour on... so you break your hand
Stranger: I'll punch you with a bomb
You: that was so funny I forgot to laugh...
You: but we agreed.
You: I am not target practise
Stranger: You are after joking about that.
You: about what? you sucking loki's dick?
Stranger: You are hurtful when intoxicated.
You: hahahaha... you wimped out of this fight so easily
Stranger: I heard you had fun when they held you prisoner before you invented the suit. What exactly were you up to?
You: being tortured... and nearly dying...
Stranger: Aw, I thought you were having a little romance with your guards! That not true?
You: well there are derek... we was fun for a while but than bored me... and then there was Muhammed... he was a bit too vicious
You: *was
Stranger: Aw. TO bad. ANyway, you can expect me there in a few minutes.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.