"Gold... please, don't do this!" My amber eyes wash over the woman I've loved for as long as I could remember and I felt... so tired. My knees quaked underneath the weight they held, and my tattered clothing quietly billowed in the silent breeze. The moon catches Crystal's wedding band with a brlliant glint, and I can't help but glance away with a fiery sneer. I could hear tentative footsteps get louder, and I knew she was coming closer. "Don't throw your life away like this..."
She tenderly put a small hand upon my arm and I shrugged her off. "Crystal, I'm not a boy anymore." I could feel her beautiful smile so well, I didn't need to look to make sure she really was smiling... and, oh god even just feeling it caused my burdened heart to quiver.
"I know you aren't... so why waste that?" Her words were simple enough, but I couldn't take it much more. We have had conversations like this before, when she would catch me stumbling around quite drunk in the streets as I tried to remember my way back home. Oh, and of course when she had to bail me out of jail for beating the shit out of her husband.
"Because I..." She placed a finger on my lips as she forced herself into my vision and... oh god, she was crying.
"Because you don't think you're worth anything... am I right? That... that nobody loves you? That the only thing left to do is kill yourself? Are you really that foolish?" Ah... yes, the nagging. I couldn't stop myself from smiling softly, and I could see how it ticked her off. "Please Gold... don't do something you'll regret."
I'm laughing now, and she looks at me with mixed shock and hope, but I see it drop into mild fear is I push my face close to hers and I know she can smell the want of death on my breath. "The dead have nothing to regret once the trigger is pulled."