Title: The Heart of a Firefighter
By: FanofRandy
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. Emergency! is owned by Universal and Mark VII Productions. I make no profit from my imagination—only a personal joy and peace.
Summary: After losing one of their own, the men mourn. Minor character death. *A One-shot in memory of the 343 Firefighters, Paramedics and other Rescue Personnel who gave their lives on September 11, 2011. We are almost upon the 10th Anniversary of that fateful day.* (Circa Season 4 for Emegency! characters)
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The procession from the funeral home to the cemetery was not very long. The day was gloomy; clouds and a mist of rain. It was as if the angels themselves were crying for the loss of the hero everyone was gathering to mourn. The men of Station 51's A-shift were all present. They were there to support their youngest member, John Gage, as he mourned his friend and former partner, Tony Freeman.
The casket was covered in a flag and rode atop the Engine from Station 10. Tony's Engine. When Johnny had left to join the Paramedics, Tony had opted to take the Engineer's test and passed. Although he enjoyed being a "Rescue Man", it was not in his blood like it had been with Johnny. Tony was happy to serve wherever he was needed. And, that is why there were all gathering today. During an exceptionally difficult fire, several men had become trapped. Tony joined the rescue efforts and was one second slower than a falling beam. His friends found comfort only in the fact that he died quickly.
Station 10's crew served as Pall Bearers for Tony's casket as it was removed from the Engine and placed over the now-open grave. As the men gathered round, Johnny serving as Tony's only family presence, the mournful sound of the bagpipes playing "Amazing Grace" hung in the air like a thick fog. Johnny's mind went back in time to when he and Tony were partners.
"Gage, why do you do this work?" Tony asked his partner one day.
"Cuz' I'm damn good at it." Gage joked.
"No, really. Why did you become a fireman?" Tony pressed.
Johnny thought a long moment. "I lost my parents when I was young. I guess it was the best way I thought I could honor their memory, make 'em proud." Johnny shared. It was the most personal information Tony had ever gotten from his young partner.
"Hmmm. I guess I'm sorta the same way. I didn't know my parents…they died when I was young. I was a pretty wild kid…got into everything. I was a thrill-seeker. Well, what better thrill than to run into a burning building and help people get out?" Tony shared.
Johnny nodded. He realized why he and Tony got along so well…they were very similar in their upbringing and why they did what they did. "I remember when I first started. Cap told me that firemen are the only ones who run INTO a burning building when everyone else is running OUT. He said that it doesn't necessarily mean that we are fearless, just that we put other people's safety above our own."
"Yeah, I got the same speech when I started. He calls it 'The Heart of a Firefighter' speech." Tony joked, but only slightly because he respected his Captain and his profession. "There's more to the speech…it comes later."
Johnny cursed the hot tears that came to his eyes and wiped them on the back of his dress uniform sleeve.
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After the Chief had said a few words and Department Chaplain had given his eulogy, Johnny was asked to come say a few words on behalf of his friend. Roy patted Johnny's shoulder slightly for encouragement as the young man broke ranks to step to the head of his friend's coffin. All was quiet for a moment as nearly 200 firefighters in full-dress uniform with black mourning straps across their badges, waited for John Gage to speak.
Johnny took a deep breath as he tried to compose himself. He began:
"We are here today to say good-bye to Engineer Tony Freeman. Tony was a great fireman and a wonderful friend. The time I spent as Tony's partner as a Rescue Man at Station 10 was pretty great. Tony had been there longer than me and I learned a lot from 'im. When you talk about a fireman, any fireman, it is hard to separate what he does with who he is. Being a fireman was something Tony loved. He didn't care where he was—crawling in a car, hangin' off a cliff, or watching the gauges on the Engine—he served this Department well.
Our Captain used to give us bits of wisdom. It was all part of a speech he called 'The Heart of a Firefighter'. Some of you out there have heard parts of it as it has gotten around over the years. I just wanted to share some of it today because Tony truly had the heart of a firefighter.
Not long after my first BIG fire, I was still reeling from the adrenaline rush. I didn't know what I expected to feel, but I had not really thought much about it. I was scared shitless, to tell the truth." Johnny paused as he saw nods and heard 'amens' from the throng of firefighters before him.
"I just sat in front of my locker after my shower, not really knowing what to do next. The Captain came in and he told me, 'You know, Gage, a fireman is the only person who runs INTO a burning building when everyone else is running OUT. It doesn't mean we are not scared, it just means that we put their lives ahead of our own. And, we hope that God is watching out for us and brings us home safely. But, if we don't come home, we can rest in knowing that we did our best.'
That was just the beginning of what is known as 'The Heart of a Firefighter Speech'. Tony told me that there was more to it and it would come later. And, I realized what he meant. More of the speech came when I found my first dead victim. Another part came when another fireman died a few months later. I got a good piece of it when the first kid died on me. And, still another piece of the speech came as I lost my first victim, who I thought we had saved in time. Over the period of the last five years, I have continued to get bits and pieces of the speech…and, now from Captain, Hank Stanley." Johnny glanced toward his Superior, who nodded his approval.
"When it all comes down to it, the heart of a fireman is filled with the paradox of courage and fear; joy and pain; laughter and tears; heaven and hell; creation and destruction; brotherhood and isolation; and life and death. Each time we hear the claxons sound; we know that it could be the last response we make. But, we roll anyway. Because there are people depending on us—people who are hurt and suffering; people who are scared and alone; people who are trapped in a building with no hope, but us—for them, we respond. It is our heart—'The Heart of a Firefighter.'"
With that last phrase, Johnny asked that all the men join him in saying the Firefighter's Prayer.
When I am called to duty, God
Whenever flames may rage
Give me strength to save some life
Whatever be its age.
Help me embrace a little child
Before it is too late
Or save an older person
The horror of that fate.
Enable me to be alert
And hear the weakest shout
And quickly and efficiently
To put the fire out.
I want to fill my calling and
To give the best of me
To guard my every neighbor and
Protect his property.
And if according to my fate
I answer to death's call,
Please bless with your protecting hand
My family one and all.
(Anonymous)
Johnny bowed his head and took his place next to Roy. There was quiet for a few moments as 100's of men wiped tears from their eyes.
Battalion Chief Conrad stepped forward as the Bugler began to play Taps. Two of the men from Station 10 stepped up and took the flag from Tony's coffin. As they carefully folded it into the customary triangle, Johnny was reminded of its significance:
The first fold of the flag is a symbol of life.
The second fold of the flag is a symbol of the people's belief in the eternal life.
The third fold of the flag is made in honor and remembrance of the one departing our ranks who gave a the ultimate sacrifice on behalf of others.
The fourth fold of the flag represents the people's weaker nature. For as American citizens trusting in God, it is to Him the people turn to in times of peace and danger for His divine guidance.
The fifth fold of the flag is a tribute to the country, for in the words of Commodore Stephen Decatur, "Our country, in dealing with the other countries, may she always be right, but it is still our country, right or wrong."
The sixth fold of the flag is for where people's hearts lie. It is with hearts that people pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
The seventh fold of the flag is a tribute to those who protect the country, its people and its flag against all enemies, whether they be found within or without the boundaries of the Republic.
The eighth fold of the flag is a tribute to the one who entered into the valley of the shadow of death, that people might see the light of day.
The ninth fold of the flag is a tribute to womanhood, for it has been through their faith, love, loyalty and devotion the character of the men and women who have made the country great molded.
The tenth fold of the flag is a tribute to father, for he too, has given his sons and daughters for the defense of the country since he or she was first born.
The eleventh fold of the flag, in the eyes of Hebrew citizens, represents the lower portion of the seal of King David and King Solomon and glorifies, in their eyes, the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob.
The twelfth fold of the flag, in the eyes of Christian citizens, represents an emblem of eternity and glorifies, in their eyes, God the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost. *
As the Bugler finished, Station 10's Captain collected the flag, and walked over to Johnny. As Johnny looked the man in the eyes the Captain said, "I know he loved you like a brother. Please accept this on behalf of the Brotherhood of the Los Angeles County Firefighters." Johnny reached out his hands and took the flag.
Once more the Chief spoke. "In the LA County Fire Department the Alarm Code 333 signifies that the company has returned home to quarters. We will now ring that code to welcome home Firefighter/Engineer Tony Freeman." The Chief then proceeded to ring the bell. After the last ring of the code, Johnny barely heard the order,
"Honor Guard, Hand Salute." With that all the firemen present raised their hands to salute their fallen comrade. "Honor Guard, Dismissed." ** Allowed them to lower their hands and continue on with their day.
Johnny stood by the grave of his friend, thinking about how his life had gone pear shaped as a young boy with the loss of his parents. And, now he wondered, as he buried another friend, how much loss would he be able to endure. He thought of a bible verse that gave me him the comfort he was seeking, "Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13
* A/N: modified from what I found: not in the official American Flag Code, but nice symbolism none-the-less
**A/N: adapted from the funeral scene in the movie "Backdraft" (Alarm Code and Honor Guard Salute)—written by Gregory Widen—who used his 3 years as a firefighter to write the movie