I get some odd thoughts in my head sometimes, and this story originates from one of those thoughts.
Why isn't anyone, in any three of the CSI shows able to hold down a stable relationship?
We have our divorcees (Catherine, Warrick, Natalia), the ones who have lost a (former) spouse/significant other (Catherine, Natalia, Mac, Horatio), failed relationships (Mac, Delko, Ryan). Those who never seem to be in a relationship (Hawkes and Greg). Then there's the playboys (Danny, Nick, Delko).
The only ones who seem to be able to hold down a stable relationship are the coroners! GSR doesn't really count as, as soon as that was out in the open, Sara had vanished off into the sunset. Neither does D/L cause we don't get any of the "normal" relationship signs.
I've been trying for the last couple of hours to put the wee dividing bar between my authors note and the story, but its not working...so I'm posting anyway.
"Unbelievable!" came the aspirated shout from the woman on the couch as the show she had been watching on the big screen TV, came to an end.
The remote went flying.
Danny Messer, who had been standing in his kitchen area cleaning up from the meal they had had earlier, looked up when she had cried out and now frowned as he saw the remote to his new TV go skidding across the floor.
"Easy there Montana. Do you know how much that cost me?"
Leaning back against the sink and continuing to dry a dish, he watched as Lindsay "Montana" Monroe sat up on the couch and turned to face him. Resting her upper body over the top of his couch, her chin in her hand.
"What's got your panties in a bunch this time?" he asked, dodging the pillow she threw at him and laughing at that look she gave him.
Lindsay ran her other hand through her hair. "Its nothing really," she began "Just this forensic show they had on."
"Ya gotta stop watching them Linds," he said before putting the newly dried dish away in its place in the cupboard "Otherwise you'll analyse them to death, what with all the procedures they get wrong and,"
"How the cops hold their guns. I know, I know." she said, interrupting him.
Danny finished off in the kitchen before going over and picking up the remote that she's thrown half way across the room "But this one's actually quite good on getting stuff like that right" she said before turning and slouching down on the couch. Sliding over to him when he came to join her.
"Then what's the problem?" he prompted.
"You mean apart from the fact that they make it seem like CSI's can solve any sort of murder in two days flat?"
"That's pushing it a bit." he admitted after a moments consideration.
She looked at him. "A bit?" she asked "Have you ever solved a case in even three days, let alone two?"
"Not technically, no."
"I'm not counting the ones where the suspect confesses within the hour, Messer." she said with a grin before falling silent. She studied the screen as the announcer signalled the start of another branch of the show she had been berating just moments ago. The short prologue and title music had kicked in before he decided to speak.
"And?" he asked, nudging her.
"And what?"
"I know you Montana, there's something else bugging you about this show," he said as he pulled her further towards him and onto his lap. "Now out with it, before I have to resort to tactical manoeuvres and interrogation techniques to get you to talk."
"Tactical manoeuvres?" she asked, raising her eyebrows at him as she tilted her head back, looking over her shoulder at him, smirking.
"Stop avoiding the question Monroe." came his muffled reply as he buried his face into her neck, enjoying the feeling of her soft skin against the rough stubble on his chin. He planted a soft kiss where her neck and shoulder met.
"Its just…they make it look like we cant hold down a serious, stable, long term relationship."
She felt him frown into her neck "We?"
"We, us, CSI's."
"Uh huh."
"I mean, take this one for example," she said sitting up, slipping out of his grasp and gesturing to the TV screen as another episode started and the opening credits whizzed across the screen.
"She was married but got divorced, then her ex-husband got killed. Oh and him" she pointed, as another actor appeared on screen "He was married but divorced within a couple of months because she couldn't handle his job."
Pulling her back against him, he looked back at the screen as another man appeared on it. "What about him?" he said, pointing to the screen as an older, grey haired man appeared.
"Secret relationship with other member of the team before they where outed and she left due to personal reasons."
"She left?"
"Yeah, just after he had proposed and things where really looking up," she said, sighing, before answering the question she could feel resonating throughout his body.
"An old case came back to haunt her and made her realise she needed to sort out a few things in her life before she could move on. Not to mention she was just recovering from almost being killed by a psychopathic murderer."
"Huh," he said as he wrapped an arm around her waist "Well, maybe its just this show."
The head in front of him shook and he watched as she reached forward and took the remote from where he had placed it on the coffee table, brought up the menu. She skimmed through the channels till she found what she wanted.
"That one was the one set in Los Angeles. Now this one," she said "This is the version set in DC and follows actually the same type of people. The boss man lost is wife a couple of years ago. That woman has had two main relationships where each time the guy has been a psycho, and don't even get me started on those two" she exclaimed as two young CSI's walked onto the screen.
"What about them?" Danny asked, they seemed pretty normal to him.
"At the end of the last season we saw them getting it on, and them Boom. Nothing."
"Nothing?" he repeated.
"Zip, nada, zilch. Its like they're not even in a relationship though we saw them wake up together and be all…relationship-ish."
"Well," he said, licking his lips "Maybe they're just being professional."
"Danny. You and me are professional. Yet we still have time to meet each other after work, go out together and even have a little PDA time during the day. Those two," she said, gesturing towards the screen as the two CSI's picked their way round the make shift crime scene "Are just odd. They don't even act like a real couple."
"What do you mean?" He frowned at the screen, nothing about the on screen pair was really shouting that they were an item, they where at work after all. He had to agree with her though, anyone that saw him and Lindsay interact, had to be blind not to notice something was going on. They didn't advertise it, but they didn't deny it either.
"I mean, if they had camera's round at the lab, everyone would know within five minutes that we where an item." she said with certainty.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah," she said as she turned slightly in his arms, leaning further back, looking up at him.
He shifted his hands so that one supported her under her shoulders while the other skimmed across the lower half of her body, occasionally dipping under the hem of her top. "You couldn't keep your hands off me. Still cant" she said looking down at his hand as it trailed across her belly.
"Is that a fact?" he asked, leaning down so that his face was inches away from hers.
He noticed a change in her breathing, saw the faint flush creep its way up her neck and onto her cheeks while he felt a small tremor shake her body. His face broke out into a smile that matched the one she wore, her eyes dipping down to his lips and back up.
She swallowed. "It is."
"Care to test that theory Miss Monroe?"
He lent down, sealing his lips over hers as she let out a low moan, her hands curling round the back of his neck and gripping the hair at the base of his head. As they settled themselves more comfortably on the couch, the remote fell to the floor landing with a thud which went unnoticed by either of them.
The TV stood forgotten.