AUTHOR'S NOTE:
Hi guys! It's theausllydoctor with another Austin & Ally fanfiction! Yes, I will still be working on The predator & the prey while I work on this story. Not to sound like an attention seeker, but I really hope this story gets some attention because honestly the Austin & Ally fanfiction archive is kind of dry and I really wish more people would keep contributing to the archive. Because, let's be honest- Austin & Ally is a Disney show straight down from heaven. OK, that's it for the disclaimer! Enjoy the story!
ALLY:
I rolled over as I prepared to get up for the fourth time with my newborn baby girl. Grace, my newborn baby, was three weeks old and I loved her to the moon and back, but I wasn't fully used to getting up with her three or four times a night to feed her or change her diaper. Good thing it was a very short distance from my bed to her bassinet.
I picked up my hysterically crying infant, my hand was on the back of her head and the other was on her bottom and I was rubbing her back, hoping to soothe her. I whispered,
"Shhh,"
in hopes to console her.
"Mommy's right here, sweet girl,"
I whispered. I put my hand on her bottom of her pajamas. It wasn't her diaper this time, because last time, I had had to get up to change her diaper. I sat on my bed, but a burp cloth over my shoulder and I popped my breast out, allowing Grace to nurse. I personally loved breastfeeding- I had heard it contributed to a strong relationship between a mother and her baby, I heard it was better for your baby by comparison to formula (of course I planned to move on to formula and rotate between nursing and bottle feeding) and my doctor said that breastfeeding would strengthen Grace's immune system, making her more resistant to infections, and even make the chances of her falling victim to crib death smaller. I already knew to put her to sleep on her back and not to put any loose blankets in her bassinet or her crib.
Her eyes were half open as she was suckling.
"You're such a beautiful baby. Mommy loves you,"
I whispered to her. After about ten minutes, she was done and I lightly tapped her back, and she burped, letting out the cutest little burp I had ever heard. She burped, but she didn't spit up. I moved her to my other shoulder and I gently removed the burp cloth from my shoulder, and put it on Grace's changing table.
I whispered,
"That's Mommy's good girl,"
and I planted a kiss on her cheek, I swaddled her back up and I put her in her bassinet. I picked up a pacifier as this would be Grace's first time trying a pacifier and I put it in her mouth and she sucked on it. Hopefully you'll sleep and let Mommy sleep too, I thought. It was now 2:30 in the morning and I hoped Grace wouldn't wake up, needing her diaper changed or needing to be fed. I was only twenty-one years old and I was a young single mom raising a newborn.
About two or three weeks before Grace was born, her father, Kevin, and I broke up. Kevin was physically, verbally, and emotionally abusive to me- he had severe anger issues and he would punch, shove and hit me when he got angry, he would dehumanize me in public for what I was wearing, made me account for my whereabouts, he would dictate who I could and couldn't spend time with, he would dictate how I dressed and acted, he would berate me for the littlest things, got jealous easily, accused me of cheating on him when he actually cheated on me a few times (with underage girls) and he would call me every name you could think of- "thot", "twat", "bitch," "whore," "slut", "hoe," "cunt", among many others. When he cheated on me with teenagers, Kevin would roofie them or get them drunk and then he would have sex with them, but of course, the teenage girls he raped and molested would be very ignorant and oblivious of the fact that he was being manipulative and he was raping them. Adolescence was tough for me- I had depression and anxiety, I would self harm by cutting myself and I even had to be hospitalized for trying to commit suicide twice, I was awkward and a geek so I was kind of an easy target for bullying, sexual harassment and inhumane practical jokes (High School was the epitome of a nightmare for me), my parents had been divorced since I was about nine years old and my dad went to a job he hated four or five days a week and he would excessively drink to deal with his stress and he would almost always walk around the house confused, aimless and he would have slurred speech. I was molested by my dad's cousin three times when I was about six or seven years old, but I didn't ever tell anyone because it was very traumatic for me. I had a lot of trauma in my life growing up, and some of the choices I made were stupid. I met Kevin when I was fifteen and he was twenty-nine, so there was a blatant age gap between us, so he had been with me for six years and abused me for three of those years. He was arrested a few weeks before Grace was born, and I got a restraining order on him. I also would drink and occasionally smoke marijuana, as they numbed my pain, but about two years ago, I gave up smoking weed and drinking as I realized neither of them were going to get me where I wanted to go in life, and I'm glad I gave up drinking and smoking pot because I didn't ever want to drink or use drugs at the expense of my baby, especially because my dad drank at my expense.
Being a single mom with a newborn was very difficult, but Grace having to witness or being subjected to Kevin's behavior would be even harder. I didn't want her to ever know him or have any contact with him. Hours later, it was 7:00 in the morning and I was exhausted because I had had to get up with Grace five times. She was getting fussy again and I tried to feed her, but she wasn't hungry. I felt her diaper, but I didn't feel or smell anything.
I was supporting her head and neck and her hips and her bottom and I was gently rocking and bouncing her, whispering,
"Shhh,"
in an attempt to soothe her. I picked up her pacifier from her bassinet and I put it in her mouth. Thank god. I was very exhausted from getting up with an infant four or five times a night ever since giving birth, I wasn't supposed to pick up anything heavier than ten pounds for a while, which was a little hard for me, and if I was lucky, I would get three or four hours of sleep, not to mention I was still healing from breaking up with Kevin and everything he'd put me through.
I said,
"Good girl, good girl,"
as my sweet baby girl snuggled against my shoulder. I gave her a big kiss on her head. I sat down on my sofa with Grace. She was swaddled up in her quilt that I had made her before she was born and I took her to the den, sitting on the couch with her in my arms. I looked down at her while she sucked her pacifier and she looked up at me with her large brown eyes.
I said,
"I know I'm not perfect, but I'll always be by your side and there when you need me, no matter what. I will love you unconditionally."
I was on maternity leave from my job and I was taking online classes. I also had living benefits for single moms so one thing I was thankful for was I was able to pay my bills and I was able to provide shelter for my baby.
First chapter down! If you like Mother, feel free to follow, favorite and review. I promise, I will be working on The Predator & The Prey as well. Love y'all :*