New series?

Disclaimer: I still don't own glee*sob*

P.S. If you have tumblr, please tell me so I can follow you. I seriously need some P+K fans there.

P.P.S. Please help me find a Beta, My grammar is way off

Kurt looked at the person before him. His mouth agape and his eyes unblinking.

"You want what!" He half asked, half shouted at Puck, who was in front of him, his cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

"You love torturing people don't you?" Puck asked Kurt, a bit conversationally, his hands were stuffed deep in his pockets while he rocked on his heels. "I need your help" he whispered to the bewildered soprano.

"With what? Your fashion sense?" Kurt asked as he surveyed the sweat pants and striped shirt Puck was wearing.

He bent low on Kurt's ear "With women" he whispered, sending shivers down Kurt's spine.

"WITH WHAT?" Kurt nearly screamed at him

"Women" Puck whispered again, as though there were thousands of people in the choir room and not just them.

"You, Noah Puckerman" Kurt said disbelief "Want help with women from me, Kurt Hummel" he said as though Puck was announcing he was gay and wanted him as his boyfriend.

Not that that was a bad idea, Kurt mused.

"Look, Dude" Puck said, pacing up and down, his hand going through his mohawk. "You hang out with girl a lot so you kinda understand them, you know?"

"One, Call me dude one more time I will strangle you with my scarf. And two, you want help from me?" He said, his tone going back to disbelief "You guy who impregnated the cheerio! head captain. You the guy who devised a plan to get said cheer leader and Finn to get back together again. You the guy who dated every girl in the entire school. YOU?"

"Yes me, guy who's been striking out for the past week. Me, guy who even though helped get said cheerio! And friend back together is practically hated by all those girls I didn't call back. Me, guy who just got slapped by the head of the chess club because I wanted to borrow her pen."

Kurt stared at him again, trying to understand what he just said.

"Is this some sick, twisted joke you jocks are planning" Kurt said suspiciously, his eyes narrowing.

"No! I swear"

Kurt surveyed him again, his eyes still narrowed out of suspicion.

And why should I help you? It's not like I'd call you my friend" Kurt said friend with so much scorn Puck openly winced.

"C'mon Kurt! There's this chic I really like and I don't want to strike out on this one" He said going down on his knees and looked at Kurt with puppy dog eyes

"And the point of this story is…?"

"Please Kurt! You're my last hope"

"So you're saying is I'm the last person you asked"

"Yeah…" Puck answered, not knowing where the conversation was going

"SO I'M YOUR LAST RESORT?" Kurt exploded at him.

"No! No!" Puck said, looking flushed once again "Well, I couldn't ask Matt since he's still trying his tricks on Santana and I couldn't ask Mike since he's still trying to figure out Brittney and Finn, well, he's Finn. So can you help me? Please? I'll do anything! I'll be your slave for a month…two months!" he added after seeing the look in Kurt face

Kurt merely raised his eyebrows at him and said "Well, I do need help with decorating my room…"

"I'll do it!" Puck said standing up

"Fine. Two months. Meet me at the parking lot after school and we'll talk about…whatever this is" Kurt said and walked away without another word.

(Pre-Lesson) Lesson; Make-over

"S'up?"Puck asked as he entered Kurt's navigator

"Isn't the football team wondering where you are?" Kurt asked as we back away from the parking lot

"I told them this is an after school beat up"

"And they believed you?"

"Kurt, You're talking about a group of people whose IQ is lower than a bag of nails. You're good"

Kurt quelled the laugh rising up in his throat. "Now, back to business. We're giving you a make-over"

"Why?" Puck said, sounding offended "I'm good looking" and pulled the rearview mirror towards him

"Puck, Your whole look screams bad boy"

"And you say it like it's a bad thing"

"We don't want bad boy. We want boy next door"

"Sounds fruity" Puck said, scrunching up his nose in distaste

"Fruity is what got Finn is dream girl" Kurt said, grinding his teeth together "Who's the girl you're trying to impress anyway?"

"Er. Some girl from the neighborhood'

"Oh. Does she go to WMHS?"

"No" Puck said almost nervously "Anyway" he said hastily changing topic "Why are me going to my house? I thought we were having a make-over"

"Your face is okay. So I just need my emergency products, it's in the trunk. Mostly it's just your fashion sense"

"Ouch?"

"It's okay" Puck said, going into the Puckerman driveway "Not everyone can be as great as me"

"Ma?" Puck called into the empty house "MA!"

Puck walked over to the coffee table, where a note for him was placed.

Noah

I'm at Mrs. Johnson's playing bridge, Cathy is at Suzy's sleepover. See you at seven

Mom

"So" Puck said after reading the note "We have the whole house to ourselves for about three hours"

"Let's get started" Kurt said "Heaven knows how long this is going to take"

"NO!" Puck said stubbornly. It was already the 2nd hour, Puck was clean, exfoliated, moisturized and other facial care known to man. Twice.

"C'mon Puck! It was inevitable"

"No way! I just re-grew it!"

"We'll it's time to cut it down again!" Kurt said approaching Puck with an electronic shaver

"But this is my thing!"

"PUCK! DO you want to land this girl?"

"Yeah but I don't see-"

"Do you want to date this girl?"

"Yeah!"

"Do you want to kiss this girl so good she'll forget everything else?"

"YEAH!"

"Then let's get to shaving!"

"But-But-But!"

"No buts! Now get your ass down on that chair and pray that I don't slip"

Puck didn't cry of course. He wasn't some pansy. He did, however, keep his hair in a jar he keeps above his bed. (Kurt didn't even want to ask)

"Okay" Kurt said, throwing open Puck's closet "Let's tackle…OH…MY…GUCHI…"

Kurt wanted to cry as soon as he opened Puck closet. Hell, it didn't even deserve being called a closet. Dung heap was more like it. It was endless mountains of mismatched and unorganized clothes. Horrible doesn't even begin to describe the smell it was giving off.

Kurt was scarred for life.

"Awesome right?" Puck said, misinterpreting Kurt's open mouth

"Puck! There's a broken yoyo here!"

"I'm sentimental, okay?"

"Sentimental I can understand but this is a plastic cockroach."

"Okay, so I keep my toys. Is that so wrong?"

"YES! Everything here is so going to good will'

In the first fifteen minutes of de-cluttering, Kurt already filled up a box. And another. And another. Until five gigantic boxes filled the room, full of toys Puck and Kurt were going to donate to good will.

"Okay, now that the toys are gone maybe we can start with the clothes. Kurt said and started to silently go through with Puck clothes, muttering to himself.

"Throwing that out" He said tossing away a brown shirt with a giant chocolate stain in front. "That one too" He said to a pair of denim short that's three sizes too small for even Kurt. "Oh, this one too"

"Hey! You are not throwing that out!" Puck said, jumping from his bed and catching the wife-beater mid-air

"Puck" Kurt said exasperated "It has holes and stains all over it. It's time to put it to rest"

"NO WAY! You know what? I feel like wearing 'Michelle' today"

"You named your shirt"

"YEAH!" Puck said in a DUH sort of way. Puck shed his shirt for 'Michelle'. Kurt used all his might not to stare. Fortunately, Puck changed very quickly. Not that 'Michelle' covered him very well. There were so many holes; it looked like Puck wasn't wearing a shirt at all.

While they were arguing about 'Michelle', they suddenly heard a knock at the door and a woman at her mid forties entered.

"Noah? I'm home" She said as entered. "Oh, who's your friend?" She asked, noticing Kurt for the first time"

"Ma, This is Kurt" Puck said, slightly abashed. "Kurt's helping me clean out my closet"

Mrs. Puckerman looked at Kurt with awe and promptly enveloped him into a hug. "I've been asking Noah to do that for ten years now" she said and then added in an undertone "Michelle?"

"Almost taken care of"

"Stick to him" She said to Puck as she let go off Kurt. "So are you staying for dinner?"

Puck shot Kurt a look, as though asking 'Do ya wanna?'

"Sure" he said

After a pleasant dinner with Mrs. Puckerman, they returned to his room, seeing as they have thousands of things to do.

It took 30 minutes for Puck to let go of 'Michelle'. And yet another for 'Sandra', 'Rosy', and 'Martha'

Kurt surveyed Puck's closet one last time and gave a nod of satisfaction. It's good…for now.

"So I'll see you tomorrow" Puck said as he escorted Kurt out

"Yeah, tomorrow" Kurt said with a dazed expression

What have I gotten myself into?