Author's Note: This was a birthday fic for the stunning troubadette. Might be the start of a series, depending on time and inspiration.
"No, we are not playing Katy Perry for our first gig."
"But I like Katy Perry." Tina bites her lip and stares at Artie defiantly.
"She can not carry a tune for the life of her." Kurt sighs and examines his keytar dubiously. "Did you hear her on the Teen Choice Awards? Atrocious!"
"Dude, you watched them?" Artie raises an eyebrow.
Kurt shrugs. "Those Chorale boys know how to fill out their suits nicely."
"I still like her songs." Tina sighs.
"Isn't the point of having a rock band creating original songs?" asks Mercedes. "Besides, I don't see why I gotta play drums."
"A band needs a drummer." Artie examines his electric carefully. "And Kurt beat you to the keytar, which will probably be easier for him, because he's taken piano lessons."
Tina hides the bass guitar case behind her legs, exchanging a worried glance with Artie. "Artie's been teaching me how to play. So it makes sense that I'd use the base, since I kinda already know how to play it a little."
"But how the hell am I supposed to sing when I'm stuck back here in the corner?" Mercedes gives Artie one of her patented glares.
"There are plenty of singers that have done lead vocals and played drums," says Artie confidently, although his hands are twitching nervously around his guitar.
Mercedes sniffs. "Like?"
"Uh, Debbie Peterson, the drummer for The Bangles sang lead on a couple of their singles."
"Karen Carpenter was a drummer and lead singer."
"Ringo Starr of the Beatles sang lead on a few tracks."
"All right, all right, I get your point," says Mercedes with a roll of her eyes. She experimentally hits the drumstick to the cymbal, which gives a satisfying crash. "Well, maybe this isn't so bad after all."
"Told you so," says Kurt haughtily. "So, are we going to do this or not?"
"We still haven't decided on a song," points out Tina with a nervous smile. "We can't do anything until we decide on a song."
"Why don't you think of something?" Mercedes keeps banging on her drum kit experimentally, secretly delighted by the loud noises it's making.
"I tried, you guys thought it sucked," says Tina glumly as she sighs and plucks at her bass strings nervously.
Artie fiddles with his gloves before slipping them off. "Let's try U2. We learned One for Glee, so at least we already know the words and stuff."
"U2?" Kurt gives a disdainful sigh. "How the hell am I supposed to play a keytar for a U2 song?"
"We could try Cyndi Lauper?" suggests Tina hesitantly.
"Or maybe you could just play the keyboard," suggests Artie under his breath.
"What did you say?" Kurt sighs and directs his disdainful look from the keytar to Artie.
Artie fiddles with his glasses. "Nothing important. Come on, let's just play."
"You mean like a jam session?" asks Mercedes, her fingers twirling around the drumsticks.
"Yeah, good idea. I mean, we already know a lot about music and stuff," says Tina quickly. "We should just... play. Do it. We can worry about singing and all of the rest of that stuff later."
"Okay." Mercedes gives her drumsticks one last tap. "I'm supposed to count you all off, right?"
"The drummer keeps the beat," says Tina. "Go to it, M."
Mercedes cackles and and starts counting off eagerly. "One, two, one two three four!"
And so, they played. Artie immediately came out as a kind of roundabout leader, having had the most actual band experience of his friends. Tina started off playing nervously, hesitant about mistakes, but soon she relaxed and focused on complementing her boyfriend's sound. That wasn't nearly as hard as she expected it to be. Kurt knew the piano, and the keytar wasn't too much of a challenge. Once he discovered synth keys, though, it got a little crazy. And Mercedes, well, Mercedes kept the beat, as enthusiastically as she could.
They weren't perfect. Tina visibly winced a few times, especially when Kurt tried out some of the synth buttons right next to her ear. More than once, Artie was tempted to throw down his electric guitar and stroll out of the practice space because they were so bad. But when they got it right, it worked.
Tina has a huge grin on her face when they stop playing about ten minutes later. "You know, I think this might actually work."
"With some more practice, we could probably be pretty awesome," agrees Artie. "I mean, we'd have to work at it, because we kinda sucked in some spots, but it's doable."
"More than doable," declares Mercedes. "But first, we need a good name."
Names are tossed back and forth for a few minutes, but eventually Kurt hits on the perfect one.
"Muppet Baby Revolution."