Disclaimer~

I don't own Bleach...'cause if I did, this story would be part of an episode..

That's right, I went there.

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Kon groaned to himself as he laid in Ichigo's closet. It was dark and gloomy in here, and he thought if he would feel a little better if the artistic bunny-loving shinigami was beside him.

He doubted it instantly after he thought it.

While Kon vaguley remembered the times in the past, he heard the familiar creak of Ichigo's door opening. He sat up, listening to the footsteps of the carrot top, but accompanied by someone else.

Someone dainter...like a princess.

"The goddess is back.." Kon murmured to himself as his mouth hung open, drool threatening to fall. "Maybe now I can get to those glorious mountains instead of admiring them from afar!"

"Ne, Kurosaki-kun.." soft voice asked. Kon inched open the door of Ichigo's closet, little by little until he could see a sliver of the two. "What are you doing?"

"Just follow my lead. There's nothing to be afraid of."

Kon cursed under his breath, he couldn't see anything.

"O-Okay...but I've never done this before..i'm nervous."

"It's alright, Inoue. Now, put your hand here, and I'll put mine here." Kon's eyes widened and he retreated to a dark corner in the large closet. -Oh my God! Ichigo's taking my princess's innocence away! Right in front of me!- Kon thought as he shook back and forth. He decided that now isn't the best time to run out and attempt to murder Ichigo, so he dared to listen further.

"N-Now what do we do...?" Inoue asked softly, and Ichigo gave her a rare smile.

"Move this way...back and forth, Inoue, back and forth."

"Ow, Kurosaki-kun-"

"ICHIGO!!" Kon shouted, hopping out of the closet like a superhero. "HOW DARE YOU-" He stopped mid-sentence, looking up at the two. "You weren't...getting it on?"

"Damn it, Kon!" Growled Ichigo. "I wouldn't do that to Inoue!"

"But...you were saying stuff like "just follow my lead" and "move this way, back and forth, Inoue, back and forth! And then she said Ow!"

Inoue giggled, and crouched down to Kon. "You're good at that, Kon! You sound just like him."

Kon forgot what he was going to say next, his eyes intent on the chest before him. She stood just before he could reach them, and he gave a depressing sigh. "Anyhow..." Started Kon. "You wanted to get down and dirty with Hime! You can't tell me a guy your age doesn't wanna-"

"Kon, we weren't doing anything like that!" Ichigo finally picked up the nuisance of a mod soul in his hand. "Dammit, we were dancing." Kon blinked, glancing between the angry carrot top and the serene princess. "Really?" Inoue nodded, petting Kon's head like he was a dog. "Of course we were! The Christmas Dance is next week, and I wanted Kurosaki-kun to be my date...but I don't know how to dance very well, so he offered to teach me on the weekends."

"But you said ow! He must've-"

"Kon, he stepped on my foot while we were dancing."

"But..but...Ichigo doesn't dance!" Kon accused.

He crossed his arms, throwing Kon to the ground. "Whenever Yuzu's sad, she wants to dance..I've had a lot of practice when I was younger." Inoue gave an assuring smile, and Kon couldn't believe it.

"Than how come you came so late, princess?"

"Well...Kurosaki-kun said to come at 8:00, but I thought he meant at night.." She said sheepishly, twirling a lock of hair around her finger. "So he went out looking for me, but I was at Tatsuki-chan's.."

"I still don't understand how you could think I meant at night, Inoue." Another glimmering smile from her as she rocked on her heels. "See, Kon? We weren't doing anything.."

"Yeah...yeah, sure." Kon didn't seem to believe them too much. Before he knew what was happening, Ichigo's hand had wrapped around him, and released him outside of his room. "And stay out, dammit."

Kon grumbled something about Ichigo and being a bastard, but then heard him saying something.

"Now, Inoue, let's start..."

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Uwa~

Kon's a dirty thinker, and the last sentence is kinda dirty, too.

Ho, ho, ho ! ;)

Anywho, faves are sweet, and flames are yellow, give me some reviews, and I'll be a happy fellow...

only, I'm a girl. 3