A/N: Hello! This is supposed to be a spin-off of the Xaiver's rules trilogy, Enjoy!
1) The appropriate date to start preparations for Christmas is December 20th.
1a) This is reminded to everyone on the 20th by Natasha screaming 'This is going to be the best Christmas ever, and NOBODY will mess it up!'.
2) Do not let Steve in the kitchen when the Christmas cookies are being baked by Kennedy.
2a) If he does end up being in the kitchen, do not let him see the large quantities of butter and sugar, as his mind will switch into 40's mode, and rant for a little while about how these baking supplies are being rationed.
3) If Thor is there, please hide all the Christmas cookies, as he probably can eat a whole batch.
4) If Natalie-Maria is duplicating herself to help reach the top of the tree, do not go up behind her and say 'boo', if you do, she will topple over on top of you by accident.
5) Do not let Clint try to make marshmallow-peanut-butter-strawberry-jam- thumbprint-plum loaf. It's disgusting, and in the process, he probably will blow up the kitchen.
5a) If there is marshmallow-peanut-butter-strawberry-jam- thumbprint-plum loaf, do not consume it.
6) At Christmastime[15-27], the only movies to be watched are Christmassy themed. This does NOT include:
Bruce Almighty
Evan Almighty
Nim's Island
Barbie: Island Princess
Barbie: A Fairy Secret
Lord Of The Rings
Harry Potter
6a) Burn all current copies of those movies in the tower.
7) At the annual Christmas party, there is typically 4 punch bowls; the 1st one is to be consumed by everyone, the 2nd is not to be consumed by anyone under the age of 18[It has champagne in it], the 3rd is for anyone who can handle a lot of alcohol[ 1/3red wine, 1/3 champagne, 1/3 frozen strawberries.], and the 4th is for those who are willing to die of alcohol poisoning [ white wine, red wine, 200% proof moonshine, and that asguardian stuff that's been aged for a 1000 years.].
7a) Do not spike the 1st bowl of punch, it's meant for Natalie-Maria and Kennedy especially, as they are only 12 and 9.
8) Tony is not allowed to spike any public drinks, ESPECIALLY THE 1ST BOWL OF PUNCH AT ANY PARTY!
8a) Clint, please stop encouraging Tony.
8b) Thor, please stop encouraging Tony.
8c) Coulson, please stop encouraging Tony
8d) EVERYONE PLEASE STOP ENCOURAGING TONY!
9) At the Christmas party, anyone who becomes extremely drunk will be drugged with chloroform, ad put on a stretcher to their rooms.
10) Anyone abusing the chloroform will become drunk as a little #3 punch will be slipped into their cup of punch.
11) At the party, lots of people will come, here are the people that will get an invitation:
The Avengers [Of course!]
Nick Fury
All of SHIELD's available agents
Close relatives
Partners
11a) Here are the people that AREN'T allowed to come:
ex-wives/girlfriends
ex-husbands/boyfriends
creepy people
other children [We don't know if they'll be more rowdy than Natalie-Maria and Kennedy]
School principals
Loki
Villans
x-men [We didn't have enough invitations for them to come last year.]
12) If the X-Men DO come, do not be offended if they show off a little bit.
13) Do not criticize the christmas cookies. Not only is it rude, but it's bit more dangerous to insult them when the chef is Kennedy, the little girl who can blow stuff up.
14) Made-for-TV christmas specials are good, but We Wish You A Turtles Christmas is banned for good.
15) Proper Christmas greetings are to be used.
16) After 9:00, Natalie-Maria is NOT allowed to have more than 10 cookies
17) Do not make Bruce angry when you say that one of the tree lights has gone out.
17a) Especially when he's been working on getting the lights on the tree for three hours.
17b) Only praise about the lights.
18) At the christmas party, there shall be no balloons. If there is, Clint will shoot them all.
19) Do not say that Clint isn't a valuable member of the team when you think he's drunk.
20) Natasha isn't allowed to put up any mistletoe.
20a) Only put the mistletoe where the couple you want has to kiss.
20b) Mistletoe isn't allowed in elevators, stairways, public door frames, and bedroom doors.
21) Christmas Pageants are only allowed if you have all the people you need, a proper written script, a performance place, costumes, and proper lighting.
21a) Make sure your written script is understandable and logical.
21b) Costumes do have to look like actual clothes from the time your play takes place in. For example, Mary didn't have rainbow coloured robes.
22) Last but not least, ENJOY THE CHRISTMAS SEASON!