A/N: Hi! Here is my latest and greatest one-shot. I don't really have anything to say except please review. If you do I'll give you internet cookies and glitter.
Alec jammed the key furiously into the hole, unlocking it with a ferocity only a Shadowhunter could have. Usually he could control his emotions and play it cool unlike his sister and parabatai. But what they said about him today was just... Unforgivable. He'd been in Idris the past week on Clave business, discussing matters about downworlders and how to make the demon wards stronger, naturally. Alec found himself more than once nodding off during a meeting, which hadn't caught his attention in the first place. Daydreaming about him and Magnus was much more exciting than arguing about a vampire gone rogue or something like that.
Before he stepped into Magnus's loft, Alec sighed heavily and counted to ten in his mind, letting the anger he felt shed off him like skin on a snake. Forcing a smile on his lips, he walked in and found the apartment in complete and utter disarray. Pillows were strewn on the floor, massacred by what seemed like claw marks and feathers laid around them like snow. Alec just chuckled and pushed one aside with his foot. He couldn't be mad at Magnus. The Warlock was too charming to stay mad at. Besides, he had promised that his anger would be left outside the loft. "Magnus?" Alec called out, bending down to unlace his boots.
"Alec!" He heard his partners voice somewhere in another room. Crashing and banging came next. "I didn't think you'd be home for at least another two hours. I was going to clean the loft before you came over, I swear." Magnus walked in, wiping his hands on a white towel. He looked the same as he always did, hair in spikes and doused in glitter, each point its own little galaxy of sparkles. Flashes of color shone on Magnus's eyelids, twinkling in the afternoon light. Magnus wore a black sweater that Alec swore was his, and white skinny jeans that did wonders for his muscles, hugging them in all the right places. His feet were bare, each toe painted a bright blue and tipped with silver glitter, and his fingertips were matching.
After Alec had taken off his troublesome black shoes, he stood up and placed his hands on Magnus's shoulders, breathing in the scent of Sandalwood and burnt sugar. "It's okay." He sighed, smiling. "I wasn't even mad, honest."
Magnus with a mischievous grin and an eyebrow raised, crossed his arms. "Then why are my boyfriend senses tingling with the impression that you are mad. Or stressed?"
Alec let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding. Acting really wasn't his forte. Manipulating people was one of Jace's many talents. What was Alec good at? Messing stuff up. Reverting back to before, when Alec was stressed and angry all at the same time, he leaned into Magnus's form. "What gave it away?" He moaned into his boyfriend's shoulder. The Warlock swirled his hand on Alec's back, forming comforting circles on his spine.
"Your eyes. They give everything away. Love, passion, desire, stress, anger. They tell all." Magnus murmured into Alec's ear. "Eyes are windows to the soul, you know." At this remark, Alec blushed, burying his head deeper into Magnus's shoulder as if to hide the red that was slowly creeping up on his face. It didn't work, the Shadowhunter knew his partner had seen his deep blush.
"Then why can't I read you like a book?" The Shadowhunter pondered. The gold and green cat eyes revealed nothing to him and yet here Alec was, as readable as a page that was marked with inky words.
"I have lived for thousands of years, Alexander. I have learned to hide my emotions." Magnus cooed further. Alec's legs almost melted like butter at his boyfriend's touch. Never before was he caressed like this, or even loved like this. Love was something entirely new to the young and inexperienced Lightwood. Unhooking his body from Magnus's, Alec walked to the low couch, which was comfortable as a cloud. As he sat down, he felt hands on his strong shoulders. "Do you want to talk about it?" Magnus asked. He meant what had happened in Idris.
Alec shook his head. He didn't want to relive the whispers and stares. All he did was curl his legs up to his chest and hug them. Alec wished he could curl into a ball and disappear for a while, until the world forgot him or at least until they were more open minded about homosexuality. Actually, getting strange looks and comments from strangers didn't bother him. But when his friends and family said it, Alec felt utterly and completely useless.
"You know, it helps." Magnus pressed further, and Alec resisted the urge to snap at him. He knew that his boyfriend was only trying to help. After all, no one liked a stubborn and stressed out Shadowhunter, and Alec was particularly moody when he was like this.
"No, I'd rather not." Alec said, staring blankly ahead through the windows of the apartment. It was noon, so the blinding light hit the glass with intensity that it blinded Alec. He didn't mind in the slightest. "But I'm not mad at you." He said reassuringly, not sure if he made himself clear on that matter.
"I know. You can't ever be mad at me. I'm much too magnificent and fabulous." Magnus replied, settling his chin on Alec's shoulder blade, his arms snaking around his chest, his long and slender fingers ending in the middle of the troubled Shadowhunter's stomach, the blue and silver fingernails overlapping. Alec made a sound in the back of his throat that could either be taken as Yeah, sure you are. or I completely agree with you. Then Magnus's arms retracted back up to Alec's shoulders, where he started to rub them in tiny little circles that dug deep into his muscles.
At first it hurt, but after a while it felt good and Alec relaxed a little bit from his former ball position, allowing his legs to stretch out in front of him. His toes almost touched the cool metal of the coffee table and he made the comparison that if Magnus sat exactly as he was, his feet could be on there all the way. That was one thing out of many that Alec liked about his boyfriend. Magnus was taller than Alec, and Alec was pretty tall. Though his boyfriend assured Alec that his tallness was what was so amazing about him,. the Shadowhunter was still insecure about his height. Come to think of it, he was insecure about a lot of things that he had absolutely no control over.
As Magnus massaged his shoulders deeper and deeper, Alec became less and less stressed, the anger inside him becoming dormant and cooling with each breath he took. He didn't realize how much he needed this. Shadowhunters were not used to this kind of affection, well, Lightwoods in the 21st century certainly weren't. Maybe his father at one point had loved his mother, but that feeling between them had long sinced passed. Alec knew that their marriage wouldn't outlast the year. Alec and Isabelle were pretty messed up to say the least, and Alec wasn't afraid to admit that. He was gay and insecure about so many things. He was scared to admit his love to anybody, because knowing what Robert and Maryse went through, well, he didn't want that to happen to him. And Isabelle, his little sister whom he vowed to protect, had taken the worst blow of all. She was cautious of men, not letting them get too close because if they did they would shatter her sensitive heart into a million tiny little pieces and it would be impossible to fix.
Tears flooded Alec's blue eyes, reasons unknown. Maybe it was because of the love that Magnus was showing him, or the pain that he felt from his fellow Shadowhunters spitting words out at him that stung like fire and burnt him into depression. Alec felt Magnus shift, leaning forward to kiss the tears that spilled down his cheeks and onto his strong jaw line. Slowly, his boyfriend moved from his chin to down his neck, pecking at his exposed pale skin, finally reaching his shoulders once again.
"Do..." Alec started, watching what he said very carefully. Knowing the clave, they had eyes and ears everywhere, even where they were not welcome. "D'you know what they said to me, Magnus?" Alec blubbered, trying to stop the words that spilled from his mouth in odd sounding sentences, but he failed miserably. Very slowly, Alec turned his neck to face his magical boyfriend and searched his green gold eyes. They held so much sympathy and sadness that Alec wanted to break down and cry right then and there. But he was a Shadowhunter. He was stronger than this.
"I heard them whisper when we were taking a break from those meetings. They said things like 'What a waste of good angel blood.' and some called me a fag. I thought that... I thought that after the kiss in the accords hall, I'd be more confident. But no. They told me what a shame it was that no one would inherit my blue eyes, and that I'd shame the name of Lightwood forever. People not much older than I came up to me and said I was a disgrace, and they wondered why I hadn't killed myself yet, out of shame that I was gay.
Angel, I tried to ignore them. Raziel knows I tried. But one day I just broke down. Everything that they said about me was true. Jace and Isabelle couldn't defend me, and Dad... Well Dad just thinks with the norm so of course he didn't speak on my behalf, and he had forbidden Mom too. I was so alone, Magnus. I didn't know what to do or say, so I sat there blankly in the meetings, not participating at all and asking myself why hadn't I ended my life. I lied to myself. I told myself that they just didn't understand yet. That we were ahead of our time. But they weren't. They just hated me, hated us."
Alec sobbed all that into Magnus sweater, which was actually his but it smelled like the Warlock. He grasped the black fabric, balling it up in his pale and shaky fists, making it more wrinkled than it already was. All was silent except for the Shadowhunter crying. But after a while, Magnus pushed him away, and Alec was forced to look up at his boyfriends face, which was a mixture of sadness and anger.
"Alexander Gideon Lightwood, listen to me." He said firmly, his hands placed on Alec's shoulders purposefully. Alec reached up and wiped away a stray tear. "Don't ever listen to them. They lie. Thats all they do. They lie to me, saying that they'll pay me what I am due but in reality get less. They lie to you, saying you are a disgrace. You aren't. You're beautiful."
"You're my boyfriend, you have to say that." Alec moaned.
"I speak the truth, and nothing but the truth. I am so lucky to have you darling, and you know that, Alec. I know it seems like no one will stand up for you in your hour of need but deep down, I know you are strong enough to stand up for yourself. I love you, you understand that, right?" Magnus said, finally convincing a young and very sad Alec, who just nodded in response. With that, Magnus continued to massage Alec's shoulders with a great force that he hadn't used before. This wasn't gentle and loving like it was before. Now it was deep and full of anger that he needed to get out.
"Magnus, you're hurting me." Alec said, and Magnus ceased to do to anymore. Which disappointed Alec. He liked the massage.
"Sorry." The Warlock apologized, walking over to the other side of the couch and sitting on the coffee table, his arms on his knees and his hands clasped together so hard that his knuckles turned a snowy white tinted with yellow.
"It's ok." Alec confirmed, waving a hand. He rolled his shoulders and noticed how much more fluid they were now. That plus him getting out the events of the past week helped him relax more. He was so tired of being mad and depressed and angry. It just wasn't worth it. Magnus, on the other hand, seemed to bear all the feelings that Alec held previously.
"I can't believe they said that about you. A waste of good angel blood. If anything they are." Magnus said, and then he stood up again and walked over to Alec who merely shrugged at the sentence that was uttered. He'd been bullied all his life, and he should be used to it, but Alec knew he wasn't/ He told himself that the words didn't hurt anymore, but they did. They left deep scars that settled in his heart and brain, making him someone he didn't like and didn't want to be. Magnus wrapped his arms around Alec's shoulders and kissed his head. "I love you."
"I know. I love you too." Alec responded, twisting his head so that when Magnus tried to kiss his head again, he met Alec's lips. It was a sad a slow kiss, just what both of them needed. Alec knew his boyfriend thought it was partially his fault but it wasn't. It never would be. So this kiss was partially to convince both of them of themselves and who they were. Hours passed, and they stayed exactly as they were, Alec comforting Magnus and Magnus comforting Alec. Because that is what they did, gained strength when the other was feeling low. They just sat there, wrapped in each others little universe, one where everything was perfect and everything was as it should be.
A/N: I thought it was cute. How about you? Review please! 1940 should be up later this week or next week sometime. Thing are going to go really really bad for them.
Ave Atque Vale,
Wicked.