A/N : A letter from George to Fred after a month of his death.
Dear Fred,
It has been a month since your death and the pain and grief you left behind is still there. No matter how many times everyone tries to cheer me up, it just doesn't seem to work.
Everything reminds me of you, reminds me of the time we spent together. Whenever someone comes near me I put on my fake smile, talk for a few seconds and run away by making some excuse. It doesn't work. Everyone sees though my feeble façade.
It hurts me to think that the only time we saw each other as old people was because of a charm during the Triwizard Tournament. And it doesn't help that everybody insists on treating me like a little kid whenever I come to meet them.
Everybody stares at me when I suddenly stop talking in the middle of the sentence expecting you to complete it, but you're not there. You broke our promise of staying together till the end of time.
I hate everyone's look of pity and I hate the way I can't seem to do anything without you. I feel like a cripple. I feel as if I should have been the one to die. You don't deserve this.
I am trying to move on, honestly. But it doesn't feel to me as if the war has ended. I have nightmares about you dying, the dead bodies of Tonks and Remus. I am not the only one suffering though. Harry, Ron and Hermione act as if everything is all right but I can see it is not, as I am going through the same thing.
There is going to be a memorial for everybody at Hogwarts every summer on the 5th of May. I have no idea how I can attend it without breaking down once again in front of everybody.
Even mom who is trying to act calm in front of everybody, can't pull it off. She went out of the dining room suddenly the other day because she called me Fred by mistake and when she realised it after a second she walked out of the room muttering apologies. She did not break down in front of everybody, you have to give her that.
Don't you understand how much pain you are causing by leaving us all?
I sometimes wear your sweater with the 'F' written in front and stand in front of mirror and pretend it is you who I am talking to and not myself.
Everyone is trying to revert back to the time when everything felt safe and everyone was happy.
From George
PS : Ron actually has some guts. He applied for Auror Training. Can you believe it, our Ronniekins?