A fanfiction for all of you in the honour of the new season 6 episode tonight. Oooo I can't wait!
"Sawyer, come on!" Juliet whined. "WHY won't you go to the store with me?"
"Because, sunshine, I'd rather stay home!" Sawyer said.
Juliet gave him her puppy dog eyes. Sawyer groaned and walked over to her. Juliet smiled. "Good. Go get your jacket."
At the store Juliet was ticking things off the list one by one. "Ok, James, lets head over there to find a football."
They walked over. Sawyer was muttering to himself. "Sonuvabitch, how the hell did she talk me into this one? God. Anyway... soccer balls, tennis balls, basketballs, baseballs, ah, here we are, footballs!"
Juliet rolled her eyes.
At that moment, a teenage boy walked over. He was wearing the staff clothes. "Hello. Can I assist you in any way?" he asked politely.
Sawyer sighed. "No thanks. We're just looking at your balls." He said, trying to be polite.
Juliet and the teenage boy both split into wicked smiles. "What did you say?" Juliet asked, giggling.
Sawyer was startled. "I just said we were looking at his balls..." his mouth twitched as the statement hit him. "Oh god. Juliet, let's go." Sawyer said, pulling a hysterically laughing Juliet along, leaving the laughing boy behind them.
When they were driving home (with Juliet chuckling and hiccoughing) Sawyer was silent. Then Juliet gasped. "Oh, Sawyer, look, there was a car crash!"
Sawyer pulled over.
Juliet and Sawyer gasped at the same time. "DOC!!!!!" Sawyer yelled.
Jack Shephard turned around. "Oh my god," he muttered.
Sawyer and Juliet were speechless. Finally Sawyer spoke, "You...You got off the island?"
Jack smiled. "Yeah. Everyone did."
"Wow," murmured Juliet.
Suddenly Jack chuckled. "I have a funny story to tell you. My son just called my five minutes ago-"
He was cut off by Sawyer. "You have a son?"
Jack spoke.
"Yeah. Yeah, he's mine and Kate's. We're married. "
There was an awkward silence.
Jack cleared his throat. "Anyway, he works on Saturday's and Sunday's at one of the stores downtown. And he called me saying that a couple were looking at all the sports balls. So he asked if he could help, and the man said, that they were just looking at his balls. Isn't that funny?" Jack said, chuckling.
Juliet broke into a wicked smile. Sawyer turned beet red. Juliet started spluttering with laughter. Jack smiled.
Sawyer smiled unwillingly sweetly in his Sawyer – ish way. "Hilarious," he said. "Now, if you'll excuse us..."
He dragged a laughing Juliet over to their car, leaving a laughing Jack behind to deal with the injuries from the car crash.
In the car, Sawyer finally turned to Juliet and said: "I'm never going to here the end of this, am I?" he asked.
Juliet smiled. "Nope," she said.
"Terrific." Said Sawyer.
Poor Sawyer.