The title's too long I had to join fourthwall and pissoff together XC

And Gintama needs more fanfictions! DX Beware of ooc-ness orz. Wrote this at 2am so yeah xD


It was a normal day in Edo. People work, kids play, and Madao's idle. At a bench on a park, sat [Name], a character whom the author was too lazy to think of a name so she just let the readers name her as they will. She was watching the children shout as they played tag with the 'it' carrying a rather pointed object, and owners walking their pet as they look for their breeding partners, for the pet and themselves.

She sighed. Yup, normal day in Edo. And author what the hell are you writing? Please take it seriously.

Not wanting to be stressed while she relaxed, the girl closed her eyes. She felt a weight on the other side of the bench so she opened it again to look at the unexpected guest.

"Ah Zura, hello." [Name] greeted, using the nickname she often hears, and picked up, from a certain silver haired man with a natural perm. And as usual, she got the male's catchphrase as a response.

"It's not Zura, its Katsura."

"What brought you here? Shouldn't you be doing some Joui stuff?"

"Sometimes a Joui patriot needs a break too."

"Well yeah, but shouldn't you be wearing some sort of disguise especially when you're in public?"

"It's fine, don't worry about it. It's not like the Shinsengumi will come here."

Meanwhile at the Shinsengumi headquarters:

"Oi Hijikata-san, you should take a break sometimes." Okita's deadpan voice breaks the silence that was invading the room.

"Oh, that's rare, Sougo is showing concern. I agree, you should take some break Toushi." Kondou advised, looking at the busy vice-chief doing a stack of paper work.

"I can't there are still a lot of work to do." He replied not looking at them and focusing on his job.

"I heard that the park is a good place to relax, if you want I can go with you." Okita suggested.

Hijikata, feeling a bit touched (and crept out) by the brunet's change of attitude towards him, looked up towards his direction. A vein pop immediately appeared on his forehead as he saw him. There stood Okita Sougo by the door, a leash on hand and smiling that smile that always irritates him. As soon as the 1st division captain saw his expression, he stated, "after all, dogs need to take a walk every once in a while."

"Who are you calling a dog?!"

Back to the park:

"What are you doing here as well?" Katsura asked the girl beside him.

"I don't know? The author didn't give me any motives on coming here." The girl casually replies.

"Seriously, that no-good author didn't think of a good plot again[1]." The male complained.

"Right?" [Name] agreed, nodding her head.

Hey! A loud voice from the sky suddenly shouts halting them from continuing their current topic.

They both sighed and silent slowly fills the air. As they sat there watching their surroundings, a cat strolls right in front of them. They both watched the cat as it pass by, its tail swinging. The scenario finally dawned on Zura and his eyes lit up, a pink tint on his cheeks.

"A fluffy cuddly ball."[2] He said, almost whisper, to himself.

"Cuddly ball?" [Name] repeated the term as she watched her seatmate stood up and followed the cat to the area behind the bushes and trees. [3] She trailed after him and saw him slowly approaching the cat.

[Name] crossed her arms as she watched Katsura sneak up to it in an attempt of fondling it, only to fail and receive a scratch on the cheek. [Name] laughed and utters, "Hm, so you like cuddly balls."

"Of course, who wouldn't? With their innate cuteness, and those fluffy fur that seduces us to pet them? They are god sent from heaven!" Zura responded, rather exaggerated.

[Name] giggled And asked, "Do you want to touch those cuddly balls? I know where to find one."
"Really?" The cat enthusiast replied face lighting up. "Then please lead the way."

[Name] took Katsura's hand, said samurai let her, thinking that she'll guide him to his image of paradise. A garden full of cats constantly meowing and snuggling his leg as he pet some that are sitting on a bench.

[Name] didn't lie. Although he wasn't expecting for this outcome. But she didn't lie.

Indeed he was touching a cuddly ball but not what he had in mind. Those fluffy ball of furs that he was so adamant on chasing whenever he sees one, wasn't the one he was currently touching right now. When Katsura noticed where his hand was rested, he immediately turned red.

"W-w-what are you doing?!" He stammered as he quickly pulled his hand back.

"I thought you want to touch a cuddly ball?" [Name] innocently answered.

"Yeah, but not that cuddly ball!"

"Hm, and I thought it was quite cuddly. I guess you prefer bigger ones." [Name] said, a bit dejected.

"No- I mean, that's not what I meant!" Zura, still flustered, can't find the right words to counter. "You shouldn't do indecent things!"

"Indecent? But it's not like I am lacking clothes, sweating and breathless while I touch regions of my body that are normally unseen by the public, in front of you." [Name] reasons, making the Joui patriot redder by the second.

"Also, it's not like we are-"

"S-stop! What are you saying?!" Katsura immediately interjected the next set of inappropriate words for the fear of having his nose gush rivers in front of her.

Ha! Take that! That's from earlier! Another voice was heard coming from the sky.

The samurai's face was a sight to behold. He was flaming up, a mixture of anger and embarrassment, with the latter the more dominant emotion. The female beside him was clutching her stomach, laughing and fully enjoying the moment.

To make matters worse, a bunch of ":P" appeared[4], surrounding the reddened male.

"Ah! Fine! I've had enough! I'm going home![5] The patriot shouted, not taking any more of the abuse he's receiving from the wrath of the author.

The female finally stopped laughing when she saw the raven-hair leaving.

"Ah, Zura!" She called.

"What?!" Said male turned, his face slowly returning to its original color.

"If you want to touch those cuddly balls again, tell me okay?" She said loudly, sending him a wink.

He was all red once again, face indescribable. If this was a rom-com anime, a steam would've visibly simmer out of his head right after she said that. His reaction was priceless. [Name] laughed again at the expression she received. Katsura, feeling embarrassment again decided to turn around and walk away quickly.

Yep. Totally worth it.


YAY! It's been a while since I've written anything xD This is also my first (published) Gintama fanfic and I didn't even know what did I just wrote xD

[1] As stated above, this is my first published fanfic for Gintama. I'm writing another one but I haven't published it anywhere since it's a series. Kinda don't want to publish it until I'm halfway through orz

[2] Got the idea when I rewatched episode 129-30. When Zura called the cats cuddly balls (or at least that's what's in the subtitle) I immediately thought of another cuddly ball lol xD deymimsoperverted

[3] That part in the episode with Hijikata and Matsudaira's daughter, the area where they talked and Gin and the gang saw them. I don't know how to call/word that place xD

[4] Well, anything can happen in gintama xD it's like the sfx in episode 2 of the latest season xD

[5] Idk why but whenever the characters had dialogue, I always hear their voice speaking in Japanese. orz So I had a hard time finding the right word for 'mou' whenever Zura had those motherly tantrums. xD