Hey so this is my first story, so please review honestly :)
disclaimer: I don't own divergent or any of the character
I stand up to let the candor man take my seat. I mentally sigh. I divert my thoughts by looking at the trees zooming by us. I feel Beatrice's gaze burning through me, like acid, it's melting me, but I don't dare meet her eyes. goodbye Beatrice. the farewell hangs unsaid between us. I silently make a list of people I also didn't say goodbye too. Goodbye mother, goodbye father. Goodbye Susan, goodbye Robert. Goodbye Abnegation. today I leave them all without warning, they will be left with nothing but the vague memory of my crimson blood dripping in the clear erudite water. I feel heat prickling at the back of my eyeballs. I quickly close my eyes. for years I have been teaching myself the art of masking your emotions and that's what I need to do today.
My body jerks backwards as the bus stops marking our destination. the other passengers press me forward until I'm off the bus. I turn around and see a blond head following me. I feel a bang of guilt, like a heavy stone drop into my stomach. out of all people I will miss her the most. I can see her decision being thought over in her head. I can feel her uncertainty like it's an aura glowing from her tiny body. I know she battling within herself right now, and i fear that abnegation is losing in her mind. If we both leave, what will our parents do? I quickly discard the thought. her fingers circle my arm as we reach the front steps. We must also think of ourselves. Stupid, I mentally scold myself, I should've told her more. I'm a terrible brother.
As predicted, the elevator is already swarming with people, without a second's hesitation my father starts ascending the stairs. my family and the rest of abnegation follow him. the sight warms my heart. it makes want to freeze time and save this moment. but of course I can't. I feel Beatrice's heavy breathing on my back, and I can tell in that moment that she was not made for this life. I once again find myself being pressed forward by a swarm of people, who I won't be able to call my faction any more. But maybe this is life being forcefully pushed to your life making decision and then trying not to think if you made the right choice or not.
I stand on the edge with the other sixteen year olds. I look around my eyes meeting pale faces and shaking hands. at the centre the metal bowls stare at me mockingly, teasing me, reminding me of how i plan to betray everyone I love today. I stare back at the bowl with the greyish stones, and then at the one with the clear water. my decision is easy. I feel pressure on my shoulder and look up to see father giving me a grin that spreads to his eyes. I involuntarily wince and pray that no one noticed.
"See you soon." he reassures as if he has no doubt on that matter. when mother hugs Beatrice she clenches her jaw, and stares at the ceiling. the fight inside her must be killing her. I take her hand and squeeze hard. I close my eyes and mentally pour my goodbyes. I clutch her hand as if I'm clutching on for dear life. this might very well be the last time you ever hold her hand Caleb. we don't say anything we wait silently, our intentions creating a barrier between us. I remember when I was eight when we were learning about faction manifestos. I read the erudite one and just like that my fate was decided. Ignorance is defined not as stupidity but as lack of knowledge. Lack of knowledge inevitable leads to disconnect among people with differences. Lack of understanding leads to a disconnect among people with differences. Disconnection among people with differences leads to conflict. Knowledge is the only logical solution to the problem of conflict. Therefore, we propose that in order to eliminate conflict, we must eliminate the disconnect among those with differences by correcting the lack of understanding that arises from ignorance with knowledge. I silently quote the manifesto in my head, over and over until the words become jumbled and it loses all meaning. I remember waking up from my aptitude test and the dark chubby candor female face staring down at my pale and skinny one.
"congratulations!" she had exclaimed. " your result was erudite, good luck on your choosing ceremony" her happy words lacked enthusiasm.
"Welcome," Marcus starts. " welcome to the choosing ceremony. welcome to the day we honour the democratic philosophy of our ancestors, which tells us that every man has the right to choose his own way in this world." my throat tightens as Beatrice squeezes my fingers harder. Marcus dives into the speech that has become worn out from being repeated every year. My eyes wander to the water filled bowl again. I am smart.
Marcus starts to call out names. I ignore the teens stumbling into their new lives. I focus on breathing.
"Caleb Prior," it takes me a minute to realise that my name has been called out. I squeeze Beatrice's hand for the last time, and look back at her as I walk away to my destiny. Goodbye, I love you. Surprisingly my hands are steady when I accept the knife from Marcus. I slide the knife down my palm and watch the blood pooling in my hand. I'm too numbed by what I'm about to do to feel the sting of my freshly cut wound. Breath. then without turning back I hover my hand above the clear erudite water. I admire the colour of my blood as it turns lighter and gradually mixing with the water to create a fuchsia pink like colour. I hear murmurs from the adults and the last thing I remember are my father's eyes burning with rage and betrayal.
tell me in the reviews if i should keep going with the story or if i should keep it as a one shot :)