Hi! Are you all excited for next Monday's episode? I can't wait for it! BTW, this fic takes us back to episode n°7 "Sacrifice".
This is an AU version of could have happened after the end of the episode, when Mike was crying outside the FBI and Ryan was consoling him.
I was asked to write this stoy by Princess135656, so the idea is doesn't belong to me! I hope you will like it and I promise, I'll be back writing some more Maxton!
"Get off me! Get off me!"
Mike's scream echoed in the silent room. All the agents were still, nobody dared to even move a muscle. Everybody was staring at Mike's dad on the big screen, dead with his throat sliced open.
Nobody moved, not even when he stormed off, tears running down his face.
The video was still on, Lily Gray's face occupying the entire surface of the monitor, her sadistic smile never vacillating.
Ryan exchanged a brief look with Agent Mendez and ran after Mike. He saw the man walk through the entire building, just to push with great strength the door facing the outside.
He sat on the steps, sobs shaking his body. Ryan followed him, slowing down as he sat down next his friend.
"Mike." he called him. He didn't answer, his sobs impeding him from talking. Mike took his head in his hands, tears falling from his face and dropping one by one on the ground.
Ryan knew what he was going through, he knew loss better than anybody. His heart broke at the sight of his friend's pain. Mike was a good man, a great agent and especially a kind person. He didn't deserve to suffer like that. He remembered him at the beginning of Joe's case, his great expertise contrasting his kindness. He looked up at him, he was a "fan" of Ryan, but after being almost beaten up to death, Mike had changed, his candour was hidden behind a hard surface of anger and hatred. He was becoming like Ryan, the man he used to so strongly to admire.
Ryan hesitantly put a hand on Mike's back.
"Oh, Mike…" he murmured. He patted his shoulder a few times and tried to hug him awkwardly.
"He's gone… he's gone…" managed to say Mike, his head a few inches from Ryan's knees. Ryan knew no words could ease his pain, so he stayed quiet.
"No, no, no, no…." whispered again Mike, grabbing Ryan's knee and letting his head drop on his hand.
Ryan lost track of time, while consoling Mike. He didn't know how much time had passed, but Mike had finally calmed down and had separated from their hug.
"I can't believe he's gone." Mike's hoarse tone made Ryan almost jump on his seat. He turned towards his friends: his eyes were red and were showing a deep pain that only maybe time could healed.
"I know."
Mike dried the last tears from his face and turned towards Ryan.
"You know what my last words with my dad are?" Ryan didn't answer back, he just kept staring at Mike. "We had a fight, because I was working too much and not visiting him and mom as often as my brothers did." He sniffled, his gaze transforming from sad to angry. "We insulted each other and I stormed off. And now he's dead…"
Ryan placed again his hand on his shoulder, but Mike didn't seem to notice it.
Suddenly, he stood up and with a determined look and his face, he started to descend the big staircase.
"Mike, where are you going?" asked Ryan standing up. Mike, a few steps down, raised his head and turned it towards his colleague.
"I'm going to find Lily Gray."
"Mike…"
Ryan jumped from one step to the other with agility, but Mike kept walking, his strides heavy and angry.
"Mike!" Ryan finally reached him and grabbed his arm.
"Let go of me!" he snapped, his voice full of hatred. But Ryan kept his hold unto him.
"Mike, you can't go…"
"Don't you dare tell me what to do, Ryan. Don't you dare." he repeated pointing a finger towards him.
"Mike… Killing her won't fix anything."
"Listen who's talking: the man who cold-blooded killed Alex Lipton last year, after we found Debra!" Mike's word hit Ryan hard, his face showed his guilt and hurt. But Ryan didn't get mad. Mike had just lost his dad, he wasn't thinking clearly.
"Mike…"
"Shut up, Ryan. Let me deal with this!" he screamed at Ryan and kept coming down the giant staircase.
"Don't be her."
At those words, pronounced with solemnity, Mike stopped. He didn't turn, he just stopped.
Ryan reached him and said again.
"Don't be her. You're a kind man, Mike. Don't become her. Because if you do it, you'll be like her. You won't be different."
Mike stood there, his eyes fixed on the city in front of him, never looking towards Ryan.
"Don't be her."
Ryan looked at his friends, and saw tears in his eyes. One by one they ran through his face.
"She killed him." he said after a while. His voice was broken and Ryan could tell he was trying hard not to start sobbing again.
"I know. We'll find her, Mike. I promise you. We'll find her."
Finally, Mike looked at Ryan. In his face he saw the promise of helping him avenge his father's death and the troubled look of someone who had gone through the same pain and loss as him.
"Don't be her, Mike. Don't be her."