Okay, this is my first fanfiction story...so please be nice! This takes place a few days after Spirit Bound, and Rose is in her jail cell.
also, I would like to say that I really dont think that Rose would do something like this, she seems like too strong a character, but I was bored and this story came to mind :D I am not sure if I am going to continue this yet.
xoxo
Lydia
I couldn't believe I was about to do something that I swore I would never do. But it seemed so painfully inevitable. I was going to be executed for high treason; for killing the queen. I was going to have to stand in a court room while people I didn't even know spouted lies about me; I was going to have to hear that I was found guilty. I would wait in my jail cell for guardians to come and take me into a high security room where I could say my goodbyes to the people I loved. And then I would die.
The thought put a great aching in my chest. I shouldn't be here! I thought desperately. Wait; scratch that…I should be here, just not for the crime they think I committed. Releasing a monster like Victor Dashkov back into the world after his ass was rightly thrown in jail was a pretty big offence, but at least I would live. Even if a life in jail wasn't much of a life at all.
These thoughts are the ones that finally made up my mind. I was going to kill myself. Ah, the irony of it! The idea of me going so over the edge because of Lissa's darkness once made me cringe. And now, even after being free from school, rescuing the man I love from a life worse then death (even he did refuse to talk to me), finally having a relationship with my parents, and having a man who loved me so much that he could over look the fact that I still had feelings for my used-to-be-strigoi ex-boyfriend; I was going to end my life all because I was too much of a coward to look into the eyes of the executioner before he injected poison into my blood stream. Because I was too much of a coward to have the words "May God have mercy on your soul" spoken to me before I was killed like a common criminal. It would be too much.
The glint of the knife in my hand didn't scare me; it was like a peace offering in the battle that was my life; a little white flag that was going to end everything so I could finally get some rest. I picked up the knife with shaking fingers, and thought of those I loved best. I apologized to Lissa for the pain I was about to cause her, but she would get over it. Dimitri had sworn to protect her, and she would always be safe. Now that she had Christen back he could comfort her. I shed a tear for Dimitri who, even after all he said about not loving me, faced a small army of guardians so they wouldn't take me away. And lastly I said I was sorry to Adrian who was really too good for me to begin with. I just wished that they would actually get to hear my heartfelt words instead of me just thinking them.
I pressed the tip of the blade to my wrist, like I had seen Lissa do a thousand times before, although I would go much deeper. I would press this knife into me until all my life's blood had been drained along with my thoughts and my fears. Death would be peaceful.
I pressed it in deeper, and cut a slash over my wrist, the blood started gushing immediately. While I still had enough strength I slit the other wrist, the pain dulling as the world blurred into one big clouded mess. I could feel myself slipping into the black oblivion. My last thought before the world went black, was that someone was being awfully loud out in the next room.