AN: I wrote this a while ago. last year actually. i was going through my old writing books and found it. Yay!
This is a tag for episode Allegiance in season 6. May be they're a bit OC, or maybe it's just been building up for too long.
Just to clarify:
Malek - Commander of the Tok'ra base
Ocker - Tokra Chief of security
Artok - A Jaffa
Artok supposedly killed Ocker
Summary: Tag for Allegiance. The use of a zatarc detector and an annoying Tokra (when are they not annoying!), force Sam and Jack to confront some of what happened when they last used the zatarc detector.
How Much Longer?
'This device is not infallible. It can give false positives.' She gave an unwilling glance towards Jack. 'We've seen it before.' He gave a tight smile in return.
'In what situation was that, Major? Just a short while ago you were willing to stake the security of the base on it. A pained look passed across her face and disappeared quickly into her professional face.
'In the situation that we were asked to recall for the zatarc test, certain emotions were involved that were – not brought to light until it was almost too late. At the time we didn't realise that we were meant to divulge those things.'
'Of what kind were these emotions?' Malek asked.
'Artok's obvious hostility towards Ocker is quite probably throwing off the readings.'
Sam answered carefully, evading the true question.
'His hostility towards the Tok'ra is the reason he's dead, Major! Were the emotions expressed in your situation that of anger and murder!' Malek spat angrily.
Sam stared at him with an intensity that he had directly received from her sometimes. After several moments of silence she said, 'No, they were not. But I do not doubt that they were of the same intensity as Artok's emotions.' She spoke with an absolute finality in her tone, and as Malek said no more, she walked swiftly to the door. 'I will go and see how Doctor Frasier is coming along. The autopsy will give us more answers', and she left the room.
Jack stared after her, hardly able to believe what had just happened. Carefully avoiding Jacob's gaze who he suspected of knowing what happened at the incident and said, 'I'll go help Major Carter', and he went off to find her. He knew her; knew that she would not have gone to Janet immediately. After a few minutes of searching, he found her sitting, leaning against a shed where he could hear the sounds of Tok'ra warriors training through the metal wall.
Her eyes were closed, but he knew she was not asleep. He crouched down besides her.
'You all right, Carter?' Her eyes flew open with a startled look, not expecting him to be so close.
'Fine, Sir.' She answered automatically, but her face was anything but that. He could see her fists clenched, her eyes determined, trying to regain self-control. He took a step back from her, giving her some greatly needed distance.
'Sorry Malek kept asking questions. I know you tried to stop him…' He stopped uneasily.
'It doesn't matter, Sir.' She stood up abruptly and dusted herself off, replacing her "mask" as best as she could.
'Carter… I think your dad knows.' She turned to face him cautiously.
'So do I, though I don't like to think how. At the briefing after Martouf died, they said they would keep it confidential.' She leant back on the shed.
'They may have said so, but I think Anise would've told him being the bitter woman that she is.'
Sam gave a dry laugh. 'Daniel told me that she tried to come on to you. At least she actually had the luxury of trying.' She said in undertone. He gave her the courteousey of looking away as she once more struggled to keep it all in. But he did it more for his own sake. Did she know how much he wanted to just… comfort her like a regular person?
'In those years since…' She gave a motion with her head. 'We haven't had to relive it like this. It's just – gosh!' She sunk back on the ground, hands to her forehead. 'I hate this!'
'How can you just be so placid?!' She shot him an angry look, as if upset that he wasn't showing the same sense of anxiety
He sat down beside her, still maintaining an appropriate distance, not knowing whether he was grateful or resentful that they could be seen. He put a hand on her shoulder for a brief second, knowing that it would calm her.
'It is hard. Very hard. But you weren't doing such a bad job of it yourself before.' They had decided to 'keep it in the room', and though technically they had left that, he still broached the topic carefully. 'It's been three years and I guess I thought… time heals everything or whatever but… I guess not.
'I know you think that he's guilty, but until we know for sure, he is innocent, Major Carter.' His voice was firm and Sam looked up in confusion to see a battltion of Jaffa walking past them.
'Yes, Sir, but I saw the amnosity between them, and Melak would never accept the word of a Jaffa-.' The battalion finished passing them. 'I don't think we should discuss this anymore, Sir.' Sam stood up again.
'I agree', he followed suit. 'I just want you to remember that you're not alone in feeling like this. It stinks. It definitely does. And maybe one day… it will be different… but we'll go on like we have for the past three years.' He looked around making sure no one would see and gently squeezed her hand in reassurance. 'Things haven't changed since that time…' Meaning that, yes, he still cared about her more than he was supposed too.
'Thankyou, Jack.' Sam quickly wiped at her face and left him.
Jack sighed and for a few seconds just told himself to breathe.
Who knew that the smart-mouthed feminist from day one would cause him so much heartache?
Jack leaned against the shed and slid himself back down to the ground. He couldn't do such a placid job as Sam though he could. He'd nearly perfected the military bravado to an art; but only around others.
How he wished so much that things would be different now. If only he could show her just how much he cared. Jack took another deep breath. Wishing never helped anyone, except those non-existent people in fairytales whose wishes always ended up going awry anyway.
He stood up, mentally shaking himself out of those kinds of thoughts, and went to check up on Janet.
Sam was there and she gave him a perfectly indifferent look which she received from him in return. Just like before…
How much longer could they do this?