It happened when he had just entered that house. And it was supposed to be one of the usual and windy autumn evenings. The sun was slowly going to down, while the moon had already appeared in the sky to accompany the sun's down, and right after the moon, some of the stars started to twinkle brightly, as if the orange sky was shining with diamonds. Young Dean Winchester entered this huge house with his father – John, who was holding his tiny hand. He was at his early seven years. He was glaring all around, astonished, that in real life such gigantic houses did exist. He always thought that they were just the plot of dramas as well as cartoons to attract the people. But he was wrong. This house was real and enormously huge, as well. The appearance of the house so much attracted him, that uncomfortable suit with tightly bounded neck-tie, which he was wearing a second time, were forgotten. Instead, he was observing every detail of the house. And while his mind was busy with imprinting each detail, they were greeted by butler of the family. John smiled, meeting his friend, who was the head of the Novak Toys Company – Chuck Novak.
'Hey, Winchester!' he exclaimed cheerfully. 'How's the life going?' he added, hugging his old friend.
'Oh, everything is alright, my dear. What about you? How do children do?' John asked, then turned to his son, who still was slightly shy in company of rich people.
'Huh, they're great! Oh!' Novak looked down to the little boy and smiled even wider. 'Look, who is here! Our little prince!' he came up to him and forwarded his hand. 'I am uncle Chuck, do you remember me?' he asked still smiling. Dean looked at his hand and then in his face, trailing on his bright blue eyes – they were attractively beautiful. 'How cute!' exclaimed the man. Dean blushed momentously and straightened.
'I'm not cute. I'm a guy...' he responded, offended. And hurried to add: 'Mister...' That made Chuck to laugh loudly and he patted boy's long hair, destroying the hair-style identical to the one that wear the young gentlemen: brushed back. Dean survived the patting and wanted to frown, but his father's gaze did not let him do that, so he just exhaled heavily and fixed his hair, looking in the mirror just behind them on the wall.
'Father.' The calm and melodic voice came from behind of Novak. Dean trained his eyes on Mister Novak, waiting for the appearance of the young guy – as it was clear from the voice, who approached them. Mister Novak turned around at the young boy, who seemed the same age as Dean was, and smiled.
'John, do you remember my youngest son, Castiel?' he asked, turning his glance at John.
'Yes, I do, but... He grew up so big!' said John, smiling at the boy. 'Hi is, what, three years older than Dean?' he asked.
'Actually, two.' corrected Mister Novak and looked up at his son. 'Castiel, I trust Dean to you. Introduce him with your siblings and guide him around. I guess, children would be a better company for this young prince.' he said, focusing on Dean, who was staring at Castiel curiously. Only then Castiel looked up at Dean and his face told Dean nothing. There was no any feeling.
Dean jolted and said with a weak voice: 'Hi.' The guy observed him for a while then smiled whimsically, which seemed strange to Dean.
'Hi, hi!' he responded and grabbed his hand. 'Come with me, I'll show you around.' And they left two men behind them, heading for God knew where. Castiel was talking in a rush: 'My name is Castiel Novak. You don't remember, but we met before, when you was burn. My father took me with himself. You looked so innocence at that time, and, you know what, you haven't changed a bit!' Castiel was smiling and looked as if he was shining so bright, that Dean also wanted to smile unconsciously.
And he was smiling. That was the first time, when he met such cordial and radiant guy as Castiel. The latter introduced him with his siblings, and Dean was shocked the third time within an evening. Mister Novak had five children, and they all were different from each other. Michael – the first son of the family, he was strict and obedient child of his father. Samandriel – the second son of the family, he differed from the others with his extremely kind character, which always was the subject of quarrel with Michael. Then there was solely one female child among his siblings called Anna. She was strange girl. Castiel told Dean, that she tended to fall in love with the boys younger than her, and warned him to be careful around her. And the last one, who was a year older than Castiel, Gabriel. This character also was quite a puzzle for Dean. But later, analyzing his actions as well as character, Dean caught himself on a thought that Gabriel was fairly analogous to his father, they shared the same character and talking manner. And this was not strange. And, as Dean knew it before, Castiel was the youngest child of the family and the direct successor of the company, as the rule of this Novak family.
Added to this, there was the other guy, who was coeval of Gabriel. Lucifer. His name appealed to Dean as a very odd name. Who would name his child after the fallen archangel, who became a devil, eventually? And this person was Castiel's aunt – Amara. Lucifer was her only child and the nephew of Mister Novak. Besides Lucifer, there was a fellow, much more older than him, who also was hanging over with Castiel's siblings – Balthazar. He was youngest step-brother of Mister Novak. Since, he was at his youth, he preferred company his nephews to the boring company of his brother and his friends.
'How did you find my family, Dean?' Castiel asked, when they were alone on balcony. Dean kindly smiled and looked far away, as if trying to find something in the dark far lands.
'They are fine. I liked them.' he responded.
'I liked you, too.' Castiel said suddenly. Dean blushed and turned his glance away from the older guy.
'Yes, and this is here, as well.' he said, covering his mouth.
'Would you like to frequent here? I mean, I could help you with your study and be your friend.' Castiel suggested to Dean, with a bright smile and sparkling light blue eyes. Then, his eyes darkened and he searched for something in the faraway. 'In particular, I have no friends. And, as you can see, there is a world of differences between me and my siblings. So... I recon... We might be...'
Dean could not bear it and grabbed his hand and firmly told, looking right into his eyes: 'I shall be your friend. I might seem an inexperienced little boy, but you can be sure that I shall be a good friend for you. Let's be friends, Castiel!' Castiel trained his eyes on Dean's firm look, then laughed out laud. Dean blinked and was confused. Castiel managed to calm his laughter and put on a gentle smile, concentrating his glance at still puzzled Dean.
'You are so sweet boy, Dean. Wish you were my brother...' he said and stroked Dean's head. 'So, you are fresher at school, huh?'
Dean kept his eyes trained on Castiel for awhile then looked away, just relaxing. This was Castiel, after all, truly intriguing person, whom Dean would study without hesitation nor doubt.
...
Henceforth, they had become the close friends, sharing everything with one another. During their long and strong friendship, Dean was the one who always dated someone and then sat by Castiel and told him everything. John and Chuck also were glad that their children were getting along well. Besides, Sam, the second son of John, also was friends with the Novak children, and shared a weird relationship with Gabriel, who always was flying around him, like bee over honey. Whilst Lucifer was usually sticking his nose to their business and disturb them. Once Dean asked him not to flirt with the Novaks, but got a hard answer: 'I never flirt with them. It's just the opposite. They hang on me, dude.' he said. That was enough for Dean to not pay attention on them anymore, instead, focusing on his own business.
It has been almost 13 years since they got to know each other. Dean was so thankful to God for meeting such friend as Castiel, who would help him whenever he was in a hard situation or just spend unforgettable times with him, gathering the boxes of memories. Castiel always was gentle with him and treated him like his brother. But that was not enough for Dean, who was thinking about strange things lately. There were times, when he simply could not take his eyes away from Castiel's lips or face, longing his stare needlessly. Sometimes, when Castiel would be too close to him, Dean could not focus on the other things, but thinking about touching Castiel, kissing him, and was unable to control his treacherous heart beating. He had own rules, when he was younger: * Never be a gay. - was the first rule, but he was obviously breaking it. And this was pissing him off even more than that he was getting more gay day by day...
'Dean, you are late, buddy.' Said Castiel, looking at Dean, who was wearing the usual lather jacket and jeans.
'Yeah, 'm sorry...' he responded, getting into car.
Castiel smiled and started the engine, saying the next: 'Oh, never mind. I would wait for you for ages if it were required.' Dean looked up at him confused, then just kept calm. 'We'll be heading for my property, 'kay?' Castiel informed. Dean just positively hummed in response, still trying to hold a distance from Castiel. But that was useless. He just could not take over his bursting feelings. They needed to be demonstrated. And Dean was trying his best to not break down and say something, struggling his desire.
When they got to the Novak property, Castiel's siblings were absent and just steward with maids were at home, even Mister Zachariah - the butler of the family, was out, perhaps with Mister Novak. Dean and Castiel walked upstairs, to Castiel's room, and the former just throw his tired body on Castiel's bed, and filled his lungs with his scent. That was the most beautiful and testy scent in the world, that Dean had ever felt. It smelled like ocean...
'So, you are tired, after all...' said Castiel before laying beside him, and stroking his head to Dean's side. Dean's heart started to beat even more faster and he made a peculiar shade of burgundy. In order to hide his face, he just turned away from Castiel, who frowned and started to stick even more annoyingly. 'Dean... What are you thinking about?' he asked, drawing transparent decorations on his back, as if teasing him. Dean did not answer first, then, suddenly and unexpectedly even for himself, he said, turning to Castiel:
'I'm looking at you and thinking that someone is gonna be so in love with you someday... And that would be the luckiest man on Earth...' he said, and immediately blushed. 'I mean... woman...' he added hesitantly, looking away. Castiel was confused for awhile, then he put on a whimsical smile and hugged him.
'Perhaps... But now, I have my precious friend, and I don't need anyone, actually. So I didn't think about dating someone.'
Dean's heart was racing, while his cheeks were getting even more burgundy. He did not expect his friend would say such embarrassing things. He was ready for some cocky and selfish answer like: 'Indeed, she will.' But that was an abrupt, that Dean could not know how to react and what to say. Yet, to not be caught, he slightly pushed away his friend and looked at him with curiosity.
'Don't you ever wonder what your future partner is doing?' he asked, sitting on the bed, still keeping his eyes trained on Castiel, whose eyes were wide open with obvious baffled impression in them. 'I always think about it... And sometimes it scares me to death, that I end up getting a new girlfriend...' Dean added, rolling on the bed, trying to find a cozy spot. 'And, frankly, I don't like dating anyone. It's not like I do want to date them, rather I have to do that. You know, to be sure that I won't make wrong decision... in the future...'
Castiel smiled gently and rolled on the bed, copying his, as it seemed at that time, troubled friend. 'Yes... Yes, I, too, think about that, Dean. And by the way, what are you doing?' Dean startled and flushed momentously. He was not the person to notice such underlined things before, until he started to be friend with Castiel. Everything around Castiel was wrapped into layers of paper and highlighted from time to time. Everything seemed so intriguing and euphoric that Dean was fanatically flying around him. And the most ridiculous thing (as for Dean) was their uncertain relationship. They were friends, but it was a bit more than just being close friends. They were treating each other like brothers, but in certain situations their actions definitely were not like the attitude of brothers towards one another. Therefore, most of times, Dean felt himself quite bewildered.
'Am... Nothing special, Cas...' Dean answered and footed himself, looking at Castiel.
'I'm just joking, Dean.' stated Castiel, when the long pause hung up between both of them. 'Are you mad at me?'
'No. No, I just...' Dean tried to tell a lie, but could not.
'So, you are, Dean...' Castiel's voice was broken and sad. 'I'm sorry, Dean. I really am...' he added, also raising up from bed.
'Ah, never mind, dude. It's okay.' said Dean, still staring at him.
'But I did want to know, what are you doing, Dean... I always wondered, what was all this for? I always wanted to hear your answer, Dean. Since the very first time, when you started to date Anna...' he said, his eyes were looking away from Dean. He could not look right into his eyes, as if he would melt away and could not say any of these words. Dean's eyes wide and jaw was chewing unpronounced words. He was just looking at Castiel, while the latter was still glancing far away from this room. 'Ah, okay. Never mind.' Added Castiel and looked up at Dean, putting on a smile. Oddly sad smile. This smile usually was used for problematic moments, when Castiel did not want to break any heart and tried to change the subject. 'What I'm saying, my father is a bit late, don't you think?' he asked melodically, still smiling.
Dean flinched and tightened his fist into tight ball. 'Tch! I'm going home.' he said and left the room. Why everything turned out like this? Why did Cas started this topic? No, that wasn't Cas, it was me... Why on Earth did I do that?! Son of a bitch! Dean was thinking and blaming himself. And, what if I won't be able to see him again? Even the thought of this was too painful. No... No, I shouldn't think about that right now... Dean stopped and take a short glance back at Castiel's door. What if he's crying now? And pretty upset? And even angry with me?.. For a while he lingered his gaze at the door. No. He turned away and continued walking through the corridor. Then, he stopped again, beat the ground, and headed back for Castiel's room. When he opened the door, Castiel was not in the room.
'Cas?' Dean called for him. And the cracking voice came from bathroom. Dean rushed there, praying for everything to be alright. When he opened the door, Castiel was on the floor with closed eyes. And the floor around him was wet, added to this, the pieces of the former glass for toothbrushes were scattered all around the tiled-floor. 'Cas!' Dean ran up to conscienceless body of his friend and lifted up his head. 'Cas! Cas!' Dean was calling him, but Castiel did not come into conscientious. Terrified, Dean notice that head was bleeding...
It was midnight, when John and Sam had shown up in hospital, where Dean was waiting when Casthiel would wake up. Mister Novak came immediately after receiving bad news, right after him Gabriel with Anna came there to. Anna was comforting Dean as if she was comforting her boyfriend, even though they willingly broke up five years ago. Samandriel was inside with Castiel. He was the one, who accompanied Dean to bring Castiel in to hospital.
'Dean, Castiel will be alright. He is strong boy...' said John, patting Dean's shoulder. Dean was nervous and was blaming himself that he left him at such a moment. It was his fault. If only he did not abandon him... If only he were there with Castiel... If only he did not initiate that conversation... Castiel would not be here... Would not be in this condition. If only he were not a fool...
'I hope...' Dean responded and wanted to enter the room, but doctor, who shown up at that moment, came to Dean.
'Hello, Mister Winchester. I'm Dc. Beaver. The analyzes of Mr. Novak are ready. His condition is quite stable and we are expecting him to get up soon. But, here is a little problem. After patient wake up, he might experience the temporal lose of memory. We can't say exactly what time he will forget, also are not sure whether he will forget something. Because such patients' attitude is quite unpredictable. But we'll be hoping that it won't affect his memory.' informed a doctor and walked away.
Dean looked up at Mister Novak and frowned. 'Son of a bitch!' he beat the ground and walked away to the exit. Sam followed him. 'Son of a bitch! Dammit! Dammit it all!' He was unable to take over his anger. He pressed his arms to his eyes, to prevent unwanted tears to come out. 'It's my fault! God dammit, it is my freaking fault!' he was marching to and fro, still feeling the infinite rage towards himself.
'Dean, calm down. It's not your fault.' Sam said, but could not touch him, to comfort him.
'No, no, no, Sammy... You don't know. 'S my fault! I was the one who abandoned him. I shouldn't do that. If I were there... If I were there...' Dean beat the ground once more and covered his face. 'Leave me alone.' he murmured.
'Dean...' Sam wanted to protest.
'Leave me alone, Sam!' Dean ordered furiously. Sam obeyed and walked in to the building. Dean headed to the garden to isolate himself from the others. He could not tolerate anyone. When he got there, he kneed on the ground and bounded hands for prayer. 'Please, God... Please, help Castiel. Please bless him... and return him to us... to me...' the droplets of tears rolled down his cheeks. 'Please...' His eyes were trained on the pitch-black sky. Then, when he soothed himself, Dean went to the Castiel's ward.
'Dean!' Samandriel acclaimed cheerfully. 'Castiel! Castiel is awake!' he added excited. Dean's eyes sparkled and he rushed into the room.
'Cas!' he called. Mister Novak slightly pulled away from Castiel, who put on a tired smile and looked at Dean.
'Dean...' his voice was tired, as well. He looked like wounded warrior with his bandage on head. Dean came up to him and hold his hand. Samandriel gestured to his father to leave them alone, and Mister Novak with Samandriel left the room, leaving them alone. As soon as they were out, Dean hugged Castiel tightly.
'Cas... Cas...' He was holding him the way too tightly, that it started to choke him. 'You okay, Cas?'
'Dean...' murmured Castiel, still choking. ''m not...' he added. Dean pulled away from him and looked at his face.
'What? What's it?' Dean asked, worried.
'You were choking me, dude...' informed Castiel with a light smile.
'Oh, sorry...' Castiel widened his smile.
'It's nothing.'
Dean could not bear it and hugged him once more, now gently and without causing a pain.
'I was worried, Cas... I was afraid... I was afraid that I would lose you...' he said, breathing in his scent. 'I'm sorry, Cas...'
'For what?' Castiel asked, confused...
'That... that... Shit, just sorry!' responded he, pulled away. Castiel laughed and looked deep into Dean's eyes, as if reading his mind. Dean's cheeks were flesh red. 'Cas, I...' started Dean, but Castiel cut him.
'I know, Dean...'
'No, I didn't mean to apologize...' he wanted to explain, but Castiel cut him again.
'I know... I also love you, Dean.' he said, touching Dean's face. Dean blushed even more and looked as if was caught by surprise. 'Oh, what the face, Dean?' asked Castiel, smiling.
'Was it... that obvious?' he struggled himself to ask. Castiel laughed and hold his hand.
'No, not really.' he said and kissed his hand. 'I just guessed that you want to say that and confessed my feelings. After all, I was the one, who seduced you...' Castiel tightly covered Dean's hand and smiled gently.
'Shit...' said Dean and laughed. 'I can't bear this...' he added.
'Bear what?' Castiel worried.
'I want to kiss you, Cas...' said Dean, blushing. Castiel smiled again and closed to him.
'And who stops you?' he asked. Dean looked up at him, surprised.
'Can I really?' he asked, still could not believe that he actually had heard that. Castiel sighed and shortened the distance between them, pressing their lips together. At first, Dean still stood astonished, then, he placed his hands on Castiel's neck and deepened the kiss, pulling his tongue into Castiel's mouth. Breathlessly, they broke the kiss, but still were close to each other, touching one another with foreheads. 'I love you, Cas.'
'Me too, Dean...' still exhaling heavily, replied Castiel.
Dean stood in front of window, crossing hands with closed eyes, and was murmuring indistinguishable words. Castiel came in to the room, but could not bother his lover. When Dean get up and waltzed up to him, he dared to wonder:
'What was you doing, Dean?' he asked, cuddling Dean tightly, as if he was afraid to lose him.
'I was thanking God.' he responded, marking a kiss on Castiel's forehead.
'You believe in God?' Castiel was surprised.
'Yes, I do, Cas.' Dean said.
'Oh, I didn't know that, Dean... I thought that you're one who does not believe in supernatural... I mean, rational person.'
Dean smiled and marked another kiss on Castiel's neck. 'I do have my own reason to believe in Him, sweetheart.' Castiel was looking suspicious at first, then put on a gentle smile and said:
'I'm glad to hear that, because I also believe in Him and His angels...' Castiel said, putting his head on Dean's shoulder. 'And I thank Him for each day, spent with you.'
Dean tightened his arms on Castiel's sides, quietly thanking God once more for the extreme happiness in his heart, which was soothing his soul...