I don't even know how this popped into my mind. I just know yesterday I was thinking about how weird it was that Chandler didn't freak out about turning thirty. So I realised that we don't actually know if he did, since we were never shown his thirtieth birthday. Oh, this is a Mondler. So, yeah, if you don't like them as a couple, I suggest you just close the page. And it's set after his party's finished. I assumed he was already living with Monica back then, since he's one year older than she is, and she is the same age as Rachel, who turns thirty in season seven.
Disclaimer: Is anything going to happen if I say I own them? Is anyone really going to believe that?
"Chandler, help me clean up this mess, please?"
"Yeah, sure." He said, his eyes not leaving the TV.
"So, are you okay? About being thirty?"
"I guess…" he trailed off, picking up a bag.
"You sure? I mean, you did take it better than Ross and Joey did, but still, you seem pretty…"
"Pretty what?"
"Silent?"
"Oh. Yeah, I guess I'm not too happy about it, but that's okay…"
"If you say so."
"I say so."
"Then it's okay." She kissed him on the cheek. "Didn't want to upset you."
"You didn't. It's just…"
"Okay, so there is something."
"Yeah. I mean, it's probably just stupid…"
"If it bothers you so much, maybe it isn't stupid."
"It's just… you know what I realised before?"
"What?"
"You turned twenty-nine two weeks ago."
"It took you two weeks to realise that? Pretty slow, are we?"
"No! I mean, I did realise it back then…but now, you're twenty-nine, and I'm thirty."
"So…?"
"So? I'm in my thirties, and you're still in your twenties!"
"What?" She laughed.
"Mon, I'm not kidding! And when I realised that, I felt like one of those creepy guys who sleep with girls that could be their daughters to prove themselves that they're still young."
"Chandler, this is ridiculous!"
"Why is this ridiculous? It's true!"
"How? Chandler, you're barely a year older than I am!"
"It's what I said before! I'm in my thirties, you're in your twenties!"
"Chandler, to be my dad, you should've conceived me when you were like… two months old. You do realise that, don't you?"
"Yeah, but what if I was thirty-nine, and you were like twenty-one? Then it would be like a eighteen years difference, and you can conceive a baby at that age! I'm in my…"
"Okay, I got it, you're in your thirties. But you're not thirty-nine and as long as I'd like to be, I'm not twenty-one anymore."
"Still, I feel like some kind of a pervert or something…"
"Are you telling me you don't want to sleep with me for the next eleven moths?
"This is so not the point."
"What is your point then? And do not tell me that you're in your thirties, because I promise I'm going to cry."
"But that's the point!"
"Okay, then what do you want to do about it?"
"I don't… I guess there's nothing I can do about it. I guess I just have to make my peace with that, and wait until you turn thirty. And try not to think about our ages when we're… you know…"
"By the way you say it, one would think you're thirty years older than I am."
"I'm freaking out here!"
"Chandler, you always freak out."
"Yeah, but I mean, you're so young…"
"As opposite to you, a creepy old man who's sleeping with someone you could've conceived when you were two moths old?" She quipped.
"Don't get all sarcastic on me, Mon!"
"You can't complain about it, since I got it from you." She pointed out.
"Okay, please, help me."
"Chan, you said that yourself, there's nothing we can do about it."
"Can't you just hug me or something?"
"Are you okay with that? I mean, if I was twenty-one…"
"Come on!"
"Gee, okay!" She said, hugging him tightly. "Feeling better, dad?"
"You know, some would find it rather annoying, but I like how much you sound like me."
"Yeah, well, baby girls tend to act like their daddies…"
"Okay, stop it."
"Sorry." He kissed her head.
"Let's go to bed, okay?"
"Want to prove yourself you're still young?"
"Sure."
That's it. Not too sound… well, you know, but I kind of like this. On some level xD.
Just review please? :) Oh, just so you know, this is a standalone, so there's no point in asking me to go on, because I won't.