Disclaimer: Don't own; don't sue. Photo credit to Little Wing Photography & Design.

Summary: Bill Forbes teaches his daughter a valuable lesson, with the help of one Damon Salvatore. (Kids!AU.)

Spoilers: None. Alternate universe: kids, human.

Author's Notes: I am so sorry for this; the cheesiness is ridiculous. I keep trying to drabble and they keep exploding. I have half a mind to continue this, but the continuation is EVEN cheesier than this. If possible. Not beta'ed.

all creatures great and small

"Get it off, get it off, get it off!"

High pitched shrieks fill the air, and Bill Forbes winces in response. He knew as soon as she came into this world that Caroline would stop at nothing to be heard, and not much has changed in the five years since. Normally she's very well behaved whenever he takes her out (according to Liz, Caroline's a right terror with her, but Bill's never seen that side of his daughter. He tells himself it's because she's a gentle soul at heart, but it may have more to do with the fact that he simply can't say no to her), but every once in a while she takes a deep breath and lets the world know just how unhappy she is with the current situation.

This is definitely one of those times.

He's jogging up to the see-saw when he notices two young boys standing near her. They're both older, with dark hair and sharply angled faces, which tells Bill at once they're Salvatores. Bill's never had much interaction with the family; the mother died young and the father is a reclusive business tycoon, but he knows Liz has complained about the man's disregard for the law more than once. She refuses to allow a few well-placed donations to curry favor in her town, something Bill has always admired about her. Neither boy is Caroline's age, so they haven't been too much of a concern for her father.

Caroline doesn't have a speck of dirt on her, a feat that never fails to impress him, and she doesn't seem hurt in any way. But her face is red with fury, tiny fists clenched against her side, and her hair has long flown out of the braid he put it in a few hours ago. Meanwhile, the younger boy is looking between his brother and Caroline, clearly at a loss of what to do. He's tugging on his older brother's sleeve, but that doesn't seem to have any effect.

It's the older brother's face that surprises Bill. He's seen them on the playground before, sometimes with a nanny (but never the same nanny twice), and he always thought there was a mean glint in the older boy's eyes. He seemed too tough for his young age, and the stiff lines of his shoulders never relaxed, even at play. But now, standing between Caroline and his brother, the boy's face is open. He's got a teasing grin on his lips, and his eyes are wide and practically sparkling. He's going to grow up to be a heart-breaker, Bill knows it.

"Care-bear? What's wrong?"

"Damon threw a bug on me!"

"Damon?"

"That would be my older brother, sir."

"I can speak for myself, Steffie."

"So, uhh, Damon, was it? Did you throw a bug on my daughter?" Bill turns towards the older boy, whose face has already become a mask of arrogance and irritation.

"No, sir. I merely offered her a closer look at one of nature's majestic creatures. It's not my fault she lacks the intelligence to appreciate such beauty."

Bill is dumbfounded, and he's sure it shows on his face. This boy can't be more than what, nine? Ten, maybe? What ten year old speaks like that? All three children are looking at him now, and as the adult he's probably supposed to fix the situation. Or at least do something to soothe his furious daughter.

"Err, Damon? I appreciate you trying to, err, educate my daughter. But she has a strong dislike for bugs – "

"They're dirty and ugly!" pipes up Caroline.

" – and we, that is, both Caroline and I, would greatly appreciate it if you didn't try to show her anything else up close and personal, okay?"

Bill's pretty positive that that was the worst talking to an adult has ever given a child, but Caroline's got her arms crossed and what just might be the smuggest expression he's ever seen, so he thinks he's in the clear.

"Of course, sir. Although I should recommend that you teach your daughter – "

"CAR – O – LINE," interjects the girl in question.

" – that what may seem to be dirty and ugly at first can actually be quite interesting. And to only be beautiful is to be boring."

"Ah, err. That's a good sentiment, Damon. Thank you."

With that, Damon strides off. The younger boy, Steffie? Stefan?, whatever his name is, hurries to catch up with him, but not before waving goodbye and smiling at Caroline. She waves back just as happily, and Bill hopes that at least those two can become friends.

"Glad to see you making new friends, Care-bear," Bill takes his daughter's hand and leads her off the playground.

"Damon's gross. Stefan's okay though."

"Yes, he shouldn't have thrown a bug on you. But he did have a good lesson in there."

Caroline's staring up at him with impossibly large eyes, mouth slightly open. "Daddy, he was a meanie!"

Bill grins. "He certainly isn't like Matthew, is he?" He hesitates. Caroline's only five. She's just started kindergarten and has a million and one different interests. She finds joy in practically everything, and she absolutely loves being in charge. He doesn't want to ever do or say something that will dim her brilliant smile. But she's also her mother's daughter, which means she'll be able to roll with the punches and become stronger for each battle she faces. He plunges ahead.

"I think he was trying to sound smart to impress you – "

Caroline sticks out her tongue and he talks a little louder to prevent any interruptions.

" – but he was basically saying that you shouldn't judge a book by its cover."

"I never do that!" Caroline gasps. "Even if the pictures are really ugly, sometimes I just listen and think of prettier pictures for the words. Especially for the books Mr. Novak picks." She wrinkles her nose and Bill almost gives up right then. But this is a lesson his beautiful daughter will need, and he might as well start now.

"I know you don't, sweetheart. But did you know, that doesn't only apply to books? It applies to everything and everyone. Bugs may seem gross and ugly, but a lot of them are really important. You like butterflies, don't you?"

Caroline nods her head rapidly and her hair flies in her face. Gently, he tucks the strands behind her ears.

"Well, butterflies start out as bugs. As caterpillars. And bees make honey and help the flowers grow. Earthworms are good for plants too. And you wouldn't call a lady bug ugly, would you?"

"Never," whispers Caroline. Her eyes are as a wide as saucers and as clear as the sky, and Bill feels as if his heart could burst with love for this wonderful girl.

"Good. And just because a lady bug is pretty, doesn't mean that's all it can do. Being pretty won't stop another bug from eating it, will it? That's why they learned how to fly."

"That's what Damon was trying to tell me? That bugs are good?" Caroline frowns as she tugs on her dress. "He's a worse teacher than Ms. Milton!"

Bill snorts and quickly tries to cover it with his hand.

"Yes, that was definitely not a good way to teach any one anything. But you know when boys are mean to you, it usually means they like you!"

"That's dumb!" Caroline stomps her feet. "I would never like someone as gross as Damon!"

"You never know, Care-bear. Sometimes the grossest bugs turn into the most beautiful butterflies!"

"Daaaaaaddy! I'm tired of talking about bugs! Even if they are good, I don't want them touching me. Especially a bug like Damon!"

"Whatever you say, Care-bear. Now how about some ice cream before we head home?"