THE BABYSITTER

By

The Queen's General

and

Her Army

"Babysitting, but Leia!" Han protested turning to his wife. "It's guy's night out and I gotta go."

"How come it's always guy's night out when it's babysitting night?" Leia returned as she finished doing her hair.

"Because you like to work it that way," complained Han.

Suddenly Luke appeared in the doorway. "Hi Han all ready for the buc….er guy's night out?"

"No I gotta babysit" grumbled Han sitting on the bed in a huff.

"Oh." Luke paused making sure Leia wasn't looking. "I know someone I can get," he whispered to Han, "be back shortly." He smiled at Leia as she turned to them. "Oh well I'd better go then," he said more loudly for his sister's sake before disappearing.

Leia walked up to Han. "Alright I'm going now, so behave," she warned.

"Okay beautiful," Han replied kissing her on the forehead.

Leia looked at him thoughtfully with a smile, then she turned to the entrance and left.

Luke poked his head in the door not long later. "Hi Han I'm back, Leia gone?"

"Yep," Han called from the sofa.

"Well heellooo, wow you are one sexy man," a tall slim woman remarked as she sauntered seductively over to Han.

"Deanna babysitting please, eyes off," Luke warned grabbing her and steering her towards the Solo children.

Han eyed the woman up and down suspiciously. "And who the heck are you?" he demanded.

"Don't worry about her let's go," replied Luke seizing Han's arm and yanking him towards the door. "You know where to reach us Deanna?" he called.

"Oooo yeeess," Deanna winked. "See you shortly boys, especially you," she pursed her lips together and sent Han a kiss.

"Luke I'm not so sure we…" Han began.

"Oh come on!" Luke dragged him out the door.

Later that night

"I wonder if all is okay" said Han worriedly as he sat at the table with Luke in the club.

Suddenly- "Heellooo sexy boy,"- echoed above the music.

"Daddy, daddy."

"LUKE!" yelled Han standing in an instant as he saw his kids with the babysitter walking through the crowd.

"I'm sitting right next to you, you don't have to yell!" Luke flinched away, covering one ear.

"Luke she's here, the kids are here!" Han cried grief-stricken.

"I do have eyes Han," Luke replied sliding down an inch in his seat.

"Heellooo sexy boy." Deanna smiled as she stopped in front of Han.

"Hey Dad we're having a great time, we been to three Cantinas already, they're great!" exclaimed the kids jumping up and down with joy.

"LUKE!"

"What! You don't have to yell!" Luke flinched again sliding down another inch in his seat.

"Where in the galaxy did you get her from!?" demanded Han turning on him.

"The Dating Agency er…Babysitting Agency." Luke slipped, cursing himself.

"You got her from a Dating Agency?" Han shouted waving his arms in dismay. "LUKE!"

"There was no babysitter available. What was I supposed to do?" Luke objected.

"FIND SOMEONE SUITABLE!"

Suddenly Wedge came up to their table. "Hey nice chick," Wedge commented looking Deanna up and down, then he saw the children. "What's the kids doing here Han?"

"Uh…Leia asked me to bring them." Han replied quickly.

"Wow! She's changed," marveled Wedge.

"Yeah." Luke agreed sitting up straighter in his seat. "You never told me that, I wouldn't have got a babysitter if I'd known they were coming."

"LUKE!" cried Han in frustration.

"Would you stop yelling at me!" Luke shouted back.

"Yeah, what did Luke do to be yelled at?" Wedge added.

"Nothin' Wedge, nothin'," Han sighed through gritted teeth, sitting down in his seat.

Wedge took up a chair at their table. "Gee Han I'll have to congratulate Leia on her trust in you." Wedge stated.

"NO!" Han exclaimed. They all turned to him. "Ah… I mean no need to do that," he smiled sheepishly.

"No I'd love to," Wedge said. "Look, the kids are having a great time, and that gorgeous babysitter, I'm surprised Leia let you out with her."

"Yeah well Leia's starting to come around lately," replied Han even more warily.

"I'll say," Luke looked at Han with astonishment. "She never normally lets you out with another woman."

"Do you think if I send Wedge to Kessel, that it might help?" Han asked getting desperate.

"Kessel?" replied Luke looking questioningly at Han.

Han suddenly turned to Luke, angry. "You started this, fix it!" He shouted pointing to Deanne.

"Me? You wanted the babysitter!" Luke retorted.

"Yeah, but not from a dating agency!" snapped Han.

"Well you try getting one on short notice on a Friday night next time!" Luke replied hotly.

"You're really helping Luke," Han said flatly, "but how am I going to explain this to Leia!"

"Explain what?" A voice asked.

"OH SITH!" Han slowly turned to the woman standing behind him. "Hello honey," he smiled.

"Mommy, mommy," the Solo's children shouted, waving from the dance floor.

"HAN SOLO!!"

"Luke's idea, not mine," Han pointed.

"Han, where's the babysitter?" Wedge suddenly asked looking around for the missing woman.

"Babysitter?" Leia questioned glaring at her husband.

"Oh…just that ugly old bat in the corner over there," Han replied quickly, gesturing.

"You hired a Gamorrean to baby sit our kids!" Leia exclaimed seeing the person he was pointing at. "Han you were supposed to be doing it!"

"Well I got invited to a buck's party, so Luke hired her," Han stated trying to get rid of the blame.

"You asked me to!" Luke protested.

"Yeah, but I thought you'd get someone better not …er…her," retorted Han pointing to the gamorrean.

"Heellooo, you must be Mrs S," Deanna smiled coming back over to the table. "I'm Deanna."

"And who pray tell is this?" Leia inquired looking the woman up and down.

"Wedge's girl friend, their on their way to Kessel, I'm just going to see them off," Han replied all too quickly.

"I've got a girlfriend?" Wedge said raising his eyebrows.

"Yes Wedge – you're going all expenses paid," Han offered.

"He'll even let you take the Falcon," Luke added.

"Yeah…," Han nodded in agreement before realizing what Luke had said. "Like hell I will!"

"But I don't want to go to Kessel," Wedge complained. "What about Bakura?" he suggested.

"Sorry Kessel only," Han said flatly.

"I've had enough!" Leia spoke up. "I'm going to pay the Gamorrean and take the kids home." She turned to leave, but Han grabbed her arm.

"Ah…..no dear let me do it," he smiled pushing Leia down into a chair.

"What about my pay sexy boy?" piped up Deanna.

"See Wedge." Han jerked a thumb in the pilot's direction.

"Sexy boy?" Leia queried looking suspiciously at Han.

"She thinks I'm Wedge. A bit blind," Han whispered back.

"Han what have you been up to?" Leia demanded. "I'm not completely dumb you know?"

"You're not? I mean…," Han started to sweat, he needed a way out of the situation, then he thought of it. "Its Luke's fault," he blamed.

"It is not!" Luke cried indignantly.

"Yes it is! He used the force to mind control me," Han lied looking at Leia.

"WHAT! I never did such a thing," Luke protested.

"He made me call that dating agency, and hire that woman. I had no say," Han stated pleadingly.

"I never mind controlled you," Luke returned agitated. "I was the one that got the babysitter not you, so don't go lying about me mind controlling you," he shouted.

"Yes he's right," confessed Han, "it's all his doing."

"Hey Leia, I want to congratulate you on letting Han…." Wedge suddenly began.

"NO YOU DON'T!" Han interrupted.

"Don't what?" Leia asked her eyes narrowing.

"It's a surprise," Han replied quickly.

"It is? I was just going to….." Wedge started.

"Say what a wonderful idea it was to get the Gomorrean to baby sit," Han interrupted again.

"Really?" Leia raised an eyebrow.

"Hey when do I get my free trip?" Wedge asked changing the subject.

"Anytime now, and you're girlfriend is going with you, and I might even send Luke and the Gomorrean to keep you company. GODS!" Han cried becoming overwhelmed.

"Why don't you just send Leia too," Luke added.

"You wanna go too Leia?" Han asked looking at her. "Why don't we send the whole Cantina Luke?" he yelled waving his hands in the air.

"A bit drastic, but if you really want to," Luke replied.

"LUKE!"

"WHAT!" Luke yelled back.

"Yee Gods what a mess!" Han sank slowly into his seat. "I think I'll go to Kessel myself," he murmured in defeat.

END

A.N

Thank you to everyone who reads and reviews this. Hope you enjoyed it.

This was written by me and my mother on a blackboard at work. Basically one wrote a line, then the other wrote the next line and so forth and so forth, until this story was made.

The above is the edited result. :)