Birds Vs Bunnies

Summary: It was meant to be a simple shopping trip. Unfortunately for the uniformed flock, it was also Easter. And we all know what that means! Mass easter egg hunts with thousands of screaming children. And overstuffed ginormous rabbits. Uh oh.

Max POV:

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Dear Diary,

It was meant to be simple shopping trip. Just the six of us, and a grocery store. Then, Iggy didn't want to come. He said he was tired. I know better, he was working on another bomb. But I was too tired to complain. Nudge stayed home to watch reruns of fashion shows. Sigh. So, it was just me, Fang, Angel, and Gazzy.

Cue calm afternoon, right? Wrong. Here's what happened:

I was flying along calmly in the air, not bothered by a thing in the world. My best friend was flying next to me, and the air was making his silky black hair flow majestically behind him. His t-shirt was hugging his body in the windstream- never mind.

Out of no where- "Max! What are all those kids doing down there?"

I looked down. "I don't know Angel."

There was a huge hoard of probably ten thousand kids down on this huge field, all lined up. Even from up in the air, I could see them all pushing and shoving.

"Let's go find out," I said, angling my wings and flying down to land in some trees near the field.

When we reached the field, I snuck up behind some of the back of the crowd. It was mostly parent and grandparents back here. A couple small children were crying that they wanted to be in the front of the pack, or something. I frowned. Next to me, a woman was talking to another woman, her friend, or something.

"Well, last year, my Bobby brought home 47 eggs. He got 10th place prize, the $20 egg!"

"Oh really? Susan got some quarters, a bruise, and only four eggs to show for her trouble. I tried to convince her not to go this year, but she insisted. You know how children can be."

"Max!" Angel whispered, tugging on my arm. "What's Easter?"

Oh! I get it now. "It's one day of the year when some bunny or something gives children all over the world chocolate eggs. It's kinda stupid, really-"

"I wanna do it." She looked determined. Uh oh.

"Umm, do what, sweetie?"

"The hunt! It's starting soon. The grand prize is $1,000!"

I sighed. I knew if I said no she would go anyway.

"Yup. You can't stop me!"

"Fine."

I sealed my fate. Fang looked at me and rolled his eyes.

Angel and Gazzy ran to the front of the pack, and we squirmed after them.

A couple minutes later, a whistle sounded, and the whole pack of kids rushed past us, and stated picking up plastic eggs and stuffing them in a bag.

"Y'know," I said conversationally to Fang, who was watching this all amusedly. "I thought birds lay eggs. Don't rabbits have live babies?"

He shrugged. I shrugged. It was too nice out to argue.

I looked around. As I turned back to face Fang, a paw grabbed my arm. I guess I was so used to Erasers trying to grab me, I Judo flipped who ever it was. As you've probably guessed, it was an Easter Bunny.

He groaned, then go to his feet.

"You're feisty for a pretty girl," He wheezed through the netting covering his face.

Eeewwww. Was a fat guy in a bunny suit hitting on me? Gross.

Fang grabbed me, and pulled me partly behind him. "Says who?"

"Big Joe."

"Right," Fang said. "I didn't know naming people after the size of their stomach, and apparently their ego was common."

"I ain't named for my stomach." I could see him leer through the netting. I shuddered.

"Whatever. Can you go away now?"

"Not until I ask the pretty girl a question. What's your name sweetheart?"

Fang tried to answer for me, but I shook my head at him. Where Big Joe couldn't see, I winked.

Flirtatiously, even though I almost threw up at getting closer to the guy, I smiled. And took a deep breath. Then, making my voice as deep as I could, I said "Sally Sherman Serendipity Soliloquy Sesquipedalian Suriname Salimonious Supposition Acquisition Alliteration Pediatrician Posterity Coniferous Capricious." I smiled again, repressing a laugh, and turned to wink again at Fang. Facing Big Joe, I said "If you have that memorized, I know a hotel we can stay!"

He smirked. "Sally Sherman Serendipity Soliloquy Sesquipedalian Suriname Salimonious Acquisition Alliteration Pediatrician Posterity Coniferous Capricious," he said with one breath.

Fang gaped. I made a face, but then brightened.

"You forgot Supposition. It was between Salimonious and Acquistion. Hah!"

Big Joe groaned. Then he grinned evilly. He reached out and grabbed my shoulders. I squirmed and kicked, but I couldn't get away. Before Fang could react, he pulled me in for a kiss. Right as I was about to have my innocence removed forever, remember, he still had on the nasty bunny head, Big Joe and I were bowled over by two thousand kids on their way back to Mommy.

Apparently, the egg hunt was over. I kicked Big Joe several times where it hurt, just for good measure, then Fang and I ran over to where Angel and Gazzy were by the trees.

Fang stared at me. "I- I- You- He-"

I put my hand over his mouth. "Can we just pretend that never happened? And I don't think I want to go to the grocery store anymore. Let's just go home."

Completely unexpectedly, he pulled me into a hug. I wanted to sigh, hug back, and stay there forever, but I had a better idea. I pulled away.

"I don't think I can tolerate this kind of behavior until you repeat my entire name."

"What? I had to remember that?"

I laughed. "No, just the actual one."

"Max?"

"What?"

"Come here."

He kissed me on the cheek, and I blushed. Angel clapped, Gazzy made disguted noises and stomped into the forest. "Don't ever do that to me again, Sally!"

I punched him, still red.

"Oh yeah, and do you think Nudge can still hack?"

"Why?"

"I want to find an online registry for Easter Bunnies on hire. I bet we can find Big Joe."

I smiled, a bit evilly. Let's just say when Big Joe arrived at our house that night for a "job" as the "Easter Bunny," his reception was less than sugar coated.

Love,

Max 3

FIN

Hope you liked! Yes, that was a little Fax. Happy Easter! Don't forget to review!