By Me
There was nothing she could do. Sitting in the back of the church, one hand resting lightly on her floral print covered lap, the other entangled in the bright red tendrils that had tumbled and twisted down her back all her life, Ginny realised that this was hell.
This was worse than the unbridled terror that had coursed through her veins at seeing Harry with Tom's diary in her first year. Worse still, than hearing in her second year that Sirius Black had escpaed Azkaban, the first person ever to do so, and was after Harry. It topped watching Harry dissapear with Cedric from the maze in her third year only to re-appear hours later clutching the body of his fallen classmate and muttering about Voldermorts return.
This was wanting, long and being denied. It was watching the only person she had ever felt strongly for outside of her family slip from her grasp. Knowing he was so close and would always be so far away. This was Harry getting married.
She sat up a little straighter in her seat, craning her neck for a glimpse of her family. Her mother was sniffling in the front row, gently dabbing at her moist eyes. Fred and George were snickering silently and nudging each other and Ron, who was actually standing beside Harry, was grinning like a maniac and occasionally sending Hermione glances. Ginny felt the weight that seemed to have settled in her stomach fall just a little bit deeper.
The wedding went smoothly, Ginny resisted the tempation to object and kept her mouth shut as she sat, seemingly forgotten in the back of the church. The reception, for that matter, was no better. Harry danced with his new bride and laughed with his old friends, making it quite clear that, even though Ginny was part of the Weasley family, she wasn't actually needed. She allowed Ron to whisk his younger sister about the floor and admitted Colin Creevey into her prescense for awhile as he attempted in vain to cheer her up.
Finally, hours later, as fatigue washed over her and the need for a bowl of chocolate icecream to drown her sorrows in consumed her, Ginny stood to leave and was immediatley hailed by Harry. She gulped.
"I'm glad you came." He greeted, sweeping her into a hug. "It was nice having you here, you've always been like a little sister to me."
The truth in that statement struck a particularly sensetive and weather beaten nerve causing Ginny to break away and spean in a dangerous tone, "No, you always saw me as Ron's little sister."
The shock on Harry's face was enough to jolt Ginny out of dreamland. Her eyes snapped opened, horror and revulsion mingled liberally with the gut wrenching feeling that seemed to have swallowed her whole.
Knowing that she wouldn't be able to sleep any more that night, Ginny slipped out of bed, padded softly past the still sleeping Hermione and down the stairs. She busied herself making tea for a few moments before settling down at the well worn kitchen table, trying frantically to erase the dream from her mind.
She needed to sleep and she knew it. Moping about because of a dream wouldn't do any good, it would only make her cranky and irratible at Ron and Hermione's wedding tomorrow.
Ginny slowly stirred cream into her tea, gaze fixed upon a point on the wall; Ron was getting married to Hermione. After years of putting them all through hell, Ron and Hermione had finally gotten their act together. All Ginny could say was that it took them long enough.
Something creaked outside the kitchen door and Ginny looked up to find Harry, tousle-haired and sleepy-eyed, standing in the doorway. She gulped.
After Harry, Ron and Hermione left Hogwarts, Ginny rarely saw The-Boy-Who-Lived. Fresh from his final battle with Voldermort, Harry went to Auror training, while Ron became an Unspeakable and Hermione jumped around from job to job trying to find something that suited her. Ginny saw the Golden Trio on birthdays and holidays only and after she left Hogwarts to become a Potions Mistress sightings of Harry became fewer in number.
Now everytime Ginny saw Harry she was astonished by how much he had changed. Gone was the boy who could make her blush by walking into the room, in his place was a man who walked as if he had somewhere to be and no time at all, yet was in no hurry. Who was courteous and just as noble as he had been when they first met. And even though his eyes were still as green as a fresh-pickled toad and his hair was still as dark as a black-board, he had filled out a bit and looked more like a man and less like a boy.
"You know," Harry began, plopping down across from her, a cup of tea in hand. "Last time I checked it was traditionally the bride and groom who had trouble sleeping." Ginny glanced up from her mug at him as he peered over his at her. "What's keeping you up?"
"Dreams." She shrugged, setting her mug down on the table, "Nightmares really."
Harry's eyebrowns dissapeared into his hairline and the hand holding his mug tightened visibly, "Not about…him, right?"
Ginny shook her head, "No." Her dreams about Tom had sunsided long ago, it was only Harry that kept her up at night now.
"What then?"
Ginny frowned, shaking her red head and sipping her tea, "It's nothing, don't worry." She assured him, tucking a stray hair behind her ear and staring into the murky depths of her drink to avoid Harry's eyes. She was twenty, she'd be twenty-one in November and Harry would be twenty-two in July, any chance she had with him had probably dissapeared long ago, along with any outwardly appearances of that horrid crush. But still, she couldn't tell him about her dream, he wouldn't understand, no one would really. No one knew, and no one would ever know…hopefully.
"Why can't you sleep?" She asked, hoping a change of subject would prompt him away from her dream.
"Dunno really." He muttered, shrugging his broad shoulders. "I just woke up and couldn't fall back asleep." Ginny nodded but held her tongue, she wished he would leave, or she wished she could feign exhaustion and leave but he seemed content to speak with her, even if she was horribly uncomfortable.
"It's kinda weird." He spoke up after a few minutes of silence, his green eyes locked on her brown ones. Ginny felt the familiar flop in her stomach and inwardly cursed herself, "We haven't really been a trio in years, not the way we used to be." He continued, oblivious to Ginny's inner turmoil.
"You always knew it would happen." Ginny couldn't help telling him, which caused him to look back up at her. "We all knew from the beginning that there was something between Ron and Hermione." Harry shrugged, and looked away, "But, Harry," Her tone called his eyes to her face, "It's not as if you're loosing them."
"It feels that way."
"Well it's not."
"How do you know?" He retorted, his eyes flaring in anger, the liquid green seeming to boil, "It feels like I'm loosing them, its felt like this for forever. I feel like they're slowly drifting further and further away from me and nothing I do will bring them back. They're going to have each other and I won't be needed…by anyone."
Ginny slammed her mug on the table, sloshing te everywhere and standing up to glare at the man across from her who was acting like a pouting child. "Listen here, Harry Potter." She growled, eyes sparking in anger as red heat rose in her cheeks, "You are not loosing them and you will always be needed and pouting about their marriage is only going to make Hermioen fret and Ron fume. You will always be needed."
"By who?" He challenged, anger apparent.
"By me."
Harry Potter was left sitting alone at the Burrow kitchen t able, a half-empty mug of tea in one hand as he peered over his right shoulder at the furiously retreating back of Ginny Weasley.
By me.
There was nothing she could do. Sitting in the back of the church, one hand resting lightly on her floral print covered lap, the other entangled in the bright red tendrils that had tumbled and twisted down her back all her life, Ginny realised that this was hell.
This was worse than the unbridled terror that had coursed through her veins at seeing Harry with Tom's diary in her first year. Worse still, than hearing in her second year that Sirius Black had escpaed Azkaban, the first person ever to do so, and was after Harry. It topped watching Harry dissapear with Cedric from the maze in her third year only to re-appear hours later clutching the body of his fallen classmate and muttering about Voldermorts return.
This was wanting, long and being denied. It was watching the only person she had ever felt strongly for outside of her family slip from her grasp. Knowing he was so close and would always be so far away. This was Harry getting married.
She sat up a little straighter in her seat, craning her neck for a glimpse of her family. Her mother was sniffling in the front row, gently dabbing at her moist eyes. Fred and George were snickering silently and nudging each other and Ron, who was actually standing beside Harry, was grinning like a maniac and occasionally sending Hermione glances. Ginny felt the weight that seemed to have settled in her stomach fall just a little bit deeper.
The wedding went smoothly, Ginny resisted the tempation to object and kept her mouth shut as she sat, seemingly forgotten in the back of the church. The reception, for that matter, was no better. Harry danced with his new bride and laughed with his old friends, making it quite clear that, even though Ginny was part of the Weasley family, she wasn't actually needed. She allowed Ron to whisk his younger sister about the floor and admitted Colin Creevey into her prescense for awhile as he attempted in vain to cheer her up.
Finally, hours later, as fatigue washed over her and the need for a bowl of chocolate icecream to drown her sorrows in consumed her, Ginny stood to leave and was immediatley hailed by Harry. She gulped.
"I'm glad you came." He greeted, sweeping her into a hug. "It was nice having you here, you've always been like a little sister to me."
The truth in that statement struck a particularly sensetive and weather beaten nerve causing Ginny to break away and spean in a dangerous tone, "No, you always saw me as Ron's little sister."
The shock on Harry's face was enough to jolt Ginny out of dreamland. Her eyes snapped opened, horror and revulsion mingled liberally with the gut wrenching feeling that seemed to have swallowed her whole.
Knowing that she wouldn't be able to sleep any more that night, Ginny slipped out of bed, padded softly past the still sleeping Hermione and down the stairs. She busied herself making tea for a few moments before settling down at the well worn kitchen table, trying frantically to erase the dream from her mind.
She needed to sleep and she knew it. Moping about because of a dream wouldn't do any good, it would only make her cranky and irratible at Ron and Hermione's wedding tomorrow.
Ginny slowly stirred cream into her tea, gaze fixed upon a point on the wall; Ron was getting married to Hermione. After years of putting them all through hell, Ron and Hermione had finally gotten their act together. All Ginny could say was that it took them long enough.
Something creaked outside the kitchen door and Ginny looked up to find Harry, tousle-haired and sleepy-eyed, standing in the doorway. She gulped.
After Harry, Ron and Hermione left Hogwarts, Ginny rarely saw The-Boy-Who-Lived. Fresh from his final battle with Voldermort, Harry went to Auror training, while Ron became an Unspeakable and Hermione jumped around from job to job trying to find something that suited her. Ginny saw the Golden Trio on birthdays and holidays only and after she left Hogwarts to become a Potions Mistress sightings of Harry became fewer in number.
Now everytime Ginny saw Harry she was astonished by how much he had changed. Gone was the boy who could make her blush by walking into the room, in his place was a man who walked as if he had somewhere to be and no time at all, yet was in no hurry. Who was courteous and just as noble as he had been when they first met. And even though his eyes were still as green as a fresh-pickled toad and his hair was still as dark as a black-board, he had filled out a bit and looked more like a man and less like a boy.
"You know," Harry began, plopping down across from her, a cup of tea in hand. "Last time I checked it was traditionally the bride and groom who had trouble sleeping." Ginny glanced up from her mug at him as he peered over his at her. "What's keeping you up?"
"Dreams." She shrugged, setting her mug down on the table, "Nightmares really."
Harry's eyebrowns dissapeared into his hairline and the hand holding his mug tightened visibly, "Not about…him, right?"
Ginny shook her head, "No." Her dreams about Tom had sunsided long ago, it was only Harry that kept her up at night now.
"What then?"
Ginny frowned, shaking her red head and sipping her tea, "It's nothing, don't worry." She assured him, tucking a stray hair behind her ear and staring into the murky depths of her drink to avoid Harry's eyes. She was twenty, she'd be twenty-one in November and Harry would be twenty-two in July, any chance she had with him had probably dissapeared long ago, along with any outwardly appearances of that horrid crush. But still, she couldn't tell him about her dream, he wouldn't understand, no one would really. No one knew, and no one would ever know…hopefully.
"Why can't you sleep?" She asked, hoping a change of subject would prompt him away from her dream.
"Dunno really." He muttered, shrugging his broad shoulders. "I just woke up and couldn't fall back asleep." Ginny nodded but held her tongue, she wished he would leave, or she wished she could feign exhaustion and leave but he seemed content to speak with her, even if she was horribly uncomfortable.
"It's kinda weird." He spoke up after a few minutes of silence, his green eyes locked on her brown ones. Ginny felt the familiar flop in her stomach and inwardly cursed herself, "We haven't really been a trio in years, not the way we used to be." He continued, oblivious to Ginny's inner turmoil.
"You always knew it would happen." Ginny couldn't help telling him, which caused him to look back up at her. "We all knew from the beginning that there was something between Ron and Hermione." Harry shrugged, and looked away, "But, Harry," Her tone called his eyes to her face, "It's not as if you're loosing them."
"It feels that way."
"Well it's not."
"How do you know?" He retorted, his eyes flaring in anger, the liquid green seeming to boil, "It feels like I'm loosing them, its felt like this for forever. I feel like they're slowly drifting further and further away from me and nothing I do will bring them back. They're going to have each other and I won't be needed…by anyone."
Ginny slammed her mug on the table, sloshing te everywhere and standing up to glare at the man across from her who was acting like a pouting child. "Listen here, Harry Potter." She growled, eyes sparking in anger as red heat rose in her cheeks, "You are not loosing them and you will always be needed and pouting about their marriage is only going to make Hermioen fret and Ron fume. You will always be needed."
"By who?" He challenged, anger apparent.
"By me."
Harry Potter was left sitting alone at the Burrow kitchen t able, a half-empty mug of tea in one hand as he peered over his right shoulder at the furiously retreating back of Ginny Weasley.
By me.