Author's Note:I had this idea in my head, of Addison after prom. The truth is that while I am a MerDer fan, I adore Addison (don't ask me how that's possible, I just do.And I'm a MAddison fan, thank you)-

Anyway, the song, "Let Him Fly" is from the Dixie Chicks (prior to the whole Bush-bashing thing)-And the song I think applies to the Addison/Derek perspective. I won't post all the lyrics here, but basically, it's a short one-shot-a look into Addison's thoughts.I will say though, that it's not an Addek fic.-It's simply Addison-centric fic. Read and Review.

Disclaimer:I don't own the characters used-they belong the the brilliant mind of Shonda Rhimes (that, and the folks at ABC.)

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"Ain't no talkin' to this man

Ain't no pretty other side.

Ain't no way to understand- stupid words of pride"

I've thought about it. I really have. But as I sit on our bed, I don't see how it could end any other way. I should have known-I really should have. The second I saw them together, I should have known I didn't have a chance. But I wanted to fight-I wanted to believe. We had a chance for a while-I even caught a glimpse of the Derek I used to know.

But Now?Now, everything's different. Derek came home last night and I could just tell something was different. He was quiet-more than usual. I didn't want to ask, even though I had a feeling. I felt something different with him, even in the way he looked at me. Why did it have to be this hard?

You know the light has left his face
But you cant recall just where or why
So there was really nothing to it
I just went and cut right through it

So now here I am-bags packed. I should be mad, shouldn't I?Some say I'm crazy, as I know there'll be rumors come tomorrow. But the truth is that I can't take it anymore. I'm tired. I take a look in the mirror, staring at the woman I see there. Who is she? Who is this person that claims to be me? I barely recognize my own reflection, it's kind of sad.

Stepping outside, I am soon blanketed in a mist of rain. Derek'll be home soon, but I simply left a note for him on the table. I wonder how long it'll take before he notices. Will he miss me?

Theres no mercy in a live wire
No rest at all in freedom
Choices we are given-
Its no choice at all
The proof is in the fire
You touch before it moves away

My car isn't as packed as I had thought it would be. I picked a hotel on the other side of town-it's small and it'll mean more driving, but atleast it means that Derek won't try and find me. There's a pale circle around my finger-one that I know it'll take some getting used to.

I'll have to talk to Chief come morning. I haven't made an actual decision yet as to if I'll stay. I like Seattle now that I'm here. But it reminds me of him. It reminds me of her. Biting my tongue, I feel the blood filter into my mouth. I don't hate Meredith, I really don't. In reality, I feel sorry for her. Because yes, on the outside, Derek's a great guy. He can say all of the right things that you've always dreamed a guy would say. But inside he's like...he's like a hurricane.

Okay, maybe not a perfect explanation but it's the truth. I stop at the stoplight, watching the red flecks of light pelt my windshield. I still have a few miles to go, and for a minute I even consider turning around.

But you must always know
How long to stay and when to go

I know it wouldn't do any good. Derek and I would go on pretending which in the end would ultimately lead to us both being unhappy. And Derek deserves to be happy-even if he is with Meredith.

I actually asked her-how stupid could I have been to think she would have told me the truth? Derek never had a patient to check on, he was with Meredith the entire time. And there I was in the midst of all our colleagues being blissfully unaware. But with the next day I knew that we couldn't make it. I knew that we couldn't survive this. He didn't even tell me.

Maybe it was the fact that I was tired, or the fact that we both realized it had gone on long enough. I found a pair of underwear that belonged to Meredith in his jacket pocket-presumably the ones that had been on the bulletin board-he actually had the decency to take them down?

Wiping at the tears, I know that I'm doing what's best. I turn left, watching the road ahead of me. It's still raining, but somewhat softer now. Suddenly I start paying a closer attention to addresses on buildings until I find the correct one. A simple hotel, a national chain at that-but it's enough for me.

Sighing, I take the key out of my ignition, staring at the building ahead of me.

And there aint no talkin to this man
He's been trying to tell me so
It took a while to understand
The beauty of just letting go

Brushing my hair back into a ponytail, I hope I look presentable. Grabbing my bag out of the car and head to the office. "I need a room."I say to the older woman who obviously isn't that interested. She puts down her issue of the National Enquirer and walks to a computer typing in a few things.

"Name?"She asks.

I space out for a moment, having not decided. For over a decade, I've been known as 'Shepherd'-so much I wonder if I can even write my maiden name anymore. I laugh, knowing that I can, but knowing it'll take some getting used to.

"Hello?"The lady asks again, chewing on a piece of overly minty gum.

"Montgomery...Addison Montgomery."

Cause it would take an acrobat 'n
I already tried all that...

So I'm gonna let him fly

I find my room-room number 34, and sit exhaustedly on the bed. I stare at my phone, knowing that it needs to be charged. But what I'm looking at now is the fact it says "One new message"-I know it's from Derek. Smiling sadly, I know it's the right thing to do. I should be mad. Upset, throwing things even. But I'm not. I'm letting go. Sticking the phone on the charger, I hit 'delete'.

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Thanks for reading!...I'm not sure if it's okay the way it turned out, But I really love the song, and can see something like this happening. Anyway, Review, please!