If you don't like creative, original adventures that are most certainly NOT CANON, you might want to avoid anything I write.
ADULT THEMES LIKELY IN LATER CHAPTERS, RATING WILL BE ADJUSTED AS NEEDED
CURSING INVOLVED IN SOME AREAS.
A/N; THIS is the bunny that bit me after chapter 34 of Scarlett Phlame's Dear Whovian Authors. At chapter 113 several more Doctors volunteered as well. Bronicida is a word of my own creation and is pronounced BRONEY - CEE- DA. It was important to have the word 'broney' in there somewhere...but because I was bitten by one of the rabbits lurking around Scarlett, I'm hoping the Doctors will comment on this one...it's all their fault anyway cuz I'm pretty sure that one of them bred that bunny and just turned it loose!
DIMENSION POPPING PONIES
Rose Tyler stared into the large box stall where she'd quarantined the new equine species she'd bought as pet sized ponies on Riaca 4 yesterday, when she'd got home the night before...and saw several ill, feverish and annoyed men in there instead. What shocked Rose, was that she knew two of them on sight.
"Doctor? Where are my ponies? And what are you doing...how'd you get here, why aren't you in the TARDIS and is there a reason you couldn't be bothered to let me know you were just fine?" She had the stall door open and the last words were right in Nine's face and very loud.
Next to Nine, Ten winced, touched her arm and said, "Let him be. If I hadn't gotten Bronicida Hay-fever, he'd still be in his afterlife universe. Along with these other bodies. Warning you now, periodically, I'm going to be on hooves, some of me. Maybe we'll take turns, dunno. It takes a long time to get over, this kind of Hay-fever."
"So...how did..."
"You bought us. From a pet store on Parteiat Six yesterday. Which shouldn't be possible, all things considered. And as far as we know, the TARDIS is scattered about, right where we each parked our her." Nine said wearily. "My you is in mine...so. Need to get back, me."
"So...the reason the Dimension hopper fried on reentry is..."
"Because you were hauling me instead of just five real miniature ponies. All of me, all my bodies before me and three after me, in fact. And three of me were resisting the transmat." Ten flushed. "Sorry."
"Not the older ones of me though, me and the next four mes, we all knew you and were trying to stabilize it." Nine smiled. "Eight and Five trusted us older ones and tried to help, Seven had to knock Six clean out to do that. Contrary, that me."
"But I wasn't anywhere near Parteiat Six!" She protested. "I got you on Riaca 4, in this Dimension. Here, not out there somewhere...I use it as a space hopper too, see. I was just shopping." She told the two she knew, prompting a quiet 'Fuck!' from one of the hims she didn't know. Tenth let out a string of curses that had several of him flushed red in embarrassment.
Rose slumped to the thick straw between Nine and Ten. "Better get you up to the house soon. Good thing for you that Pete put me in the Mother in Law house instead of the main one. We'll have some privacy while we figure out what comes next. I wish I could say 'sorry' and mean it, but damn it...once the hopper is fixed I can get you back to the TARDIS...and locating the right 'you' isn't a problem now...so...yeah."
"Ten, how did you lose Rose?" Nine's tone wasn't the friendliest she'd ever heard, so she simply got in his way. He couldn't punch his next body without punching her. He glared at her for a moment, then sighed.
"Raise your arm."
He looked askance at her but raised his arm, only to find her ducking under it to cuddle against his side. He lowered his arm and brought it around her back, holding her firmly against his side, dropped a kiss to the top of her head and then brought his other arm around as well to card his fingers gently through her hair. She sighed happily making him smile indulgently.
The other hims raised an eyebrow, each, at his wordless acceptance of a snuggle request, though they did calm down at that point.
"Look, all this chitchat is very nice...and it's also nice that I apparently both know and trust you, which is considerably better than some situations I've been in, but what the hell is going on?" A blond man in an eye-blinding coat of many, many bright colors snapped. "Where is my TARDIS?"
"Where Ten parked her before the hay-fever hit." Nine drawled. "That's not where we are though."
"No. We're not in our universe just now." Ten confirmed. "Where's Handy?"
Pain covered Rose's features and she looked away, burying her face into Nine's chest and refusing to look at Ten now.
"Rose? What happened?" Tenth's voice was urgent. "What's wrong?"
"You didn't make it. When the TARDIS left you just...faded away. Nothing but dust in the ocean breeze. Just...gone. I don't want to talk about it."
"What's she talking about, we didn't make it?" Nine growled now, pulling her up and onto his lap and not liking her shivering in the least. He shushed her as he tucked her head under his chin and cradled her close to himself. The younger selves watched in unabashed disbelief, not only at the fact that they were apparently coddling her but that Ten apparently agreed with the behavior.
"I had a part-human metacrisis." Ten told himselves quietly. "He was still mostly Time Lord, but he only had one heart and he was aging like a human. But still, he was ME, couldn't stay in our home universe, not both of us...so...I gave him to Rose. I thought he would've aged with her. Apparently our age caught up with him instead." He looked at Nine, eyes full of tears.
"Damn it. Part human or not he wasn't a pet." Was all Nine said and pulled Rose in tight. "Look, we get back to our universe and we can wait at UNIT. We'll fix her hopper so she can go get one of the TARDIS' and tell her where we are so the other hers can go fetch us, since by that time the rest of us will be back in the past where we should be. Probably...what Rose?"
She had groaned at the word 'probably'. "You used the 'p' word...you Jinxed it."
Nine paused, sighed and groaned himself...all of himselves.
"Look, there was one point where I spend a day or three with Eight, and you picked me up later. I'll just go right back to Eight. He walked back to that yous' TARDIS but she was parked ten blocks away so if we figure to drop me with that you, just about a block away from where my you had just picked me up," She pointed at Ten, "We can intercept Eight cuz that you knows which you to give me back to and that you can figure out when on his own...cuz it's just a matter of dates at that point. And Eight at least, is better at pinpointing a date...and an address. He's also a lot easier to get along with, what with all that empathy...and he snuggles almost as good as you do." She told Nine, looking up at him from where her head still lay on his chest.
"Almost?"
"Shorter arms."
"Ah." Nine grinned and just tightened his longer ones around his precious Rose.
Six started to open his mouth and closed it as he received a glare from Rose. "Watch it." She warned. These older yous, told me all about Sixth you...and your mouth. Behave or I'll introduce you to mum while she's still ticked off at this you...right after you met her the first time," Rose pointed at top of Nine's short cropped head, "And let her put some manners into you...her way." Rose wagged a finger at Sixth. "Behave."
Sixth paused, watched both Nine and Ten pale, then reach for their cheeks: He decided not to push it.
"Wise choice." Nine murmured. "Her mum will not hesitate to slap us so hard there is some danger of regeneration from the impact."
"True, very true." Ten agreed. "On the other hand, she did let me sleep of the regeneration from you at her flat. She adopted you, you know, sort of, once she'd had that chat with you. Decided we needed a mum and told me flat out that means all of us...the lot of us, are son in laws to her via Rose."
"Mums discipline their sons..." Nine groused. "Well hell, at least she cares enough to do it, I guess."
"Jackie Tyler, mother in law. Well, she's gonna slap us anyway, so we may as well get something out of it."
"That sounds...very...domestic, lads." A youngster with a fifty foot scarf grinned.
"Rose is worth it. She's the right one, to be domestic with." Ten told them. "Be nice and you'll probably get snuggled too."
"Why would she do that? She doesn't know us." Seventh scoffed.
"You're me. That's all she needs to know...and they are all Me, Rose. Every man in this...stall." Nine confirmed.
"Okay." She looked around at the others. "Baby Doctors, some of them are adorable." She was looking at Five, who was beet red.
"Oi!" Came a voice she knew from under a pile of straw. It moved revealing an additional Doctor. "Can't a man get some sleep when he's sick...I mean, really, mes." He paused at the scowls he was getting from Ten and Nine, spotted the mop of blonde tresses atop the head of a pink clad human female and knew...just knew that there was only one person Nine would cradle so tenderly.
"Rose? Is that you? How'd you get here?"
"Yeah, it's me. And you 're actually in Pete's World. Look, can any of you walk?"
"Yeah, we all can, actually. At least we're past the pony phase...she bought us at the pet store while we were reduced to pony brains..." Sixth informed 11th of what had a happened and the plan Rose had made to get them back where they belonged.
"Well, her plans usually work. She's better at planning." Eleven smiled at his pink and yellow human affectionately.
"Has to be, she's really extra powerfully jeopardy friendly, our Rose." Nine told them, grinning as he told on her.
Ten nodded. "If there's a way to get into trouble and it doesn't find her itself..." He confirmed.
"Then she'll decide she's waited long enough and go looking for it." Eleven sighed. "Her ideas for acceptable levels of trouble need two or more of me to get her clear of...and has the trouble finding abilities of at least sixteen or seventeen Jos or ten Aces." She told the others. All of those who'd known Jo groaned, though Seven and Eight began to swear. "And she outmatches Ace without explosives or anything sharp."
Seven and Eight just increased the creativity of their chosen swearwords and cussed louder.
"OI!" Rose protested. "Only cuz I haveta get you out of whatever mess you're in the middle of! I'm good at looking after you, aren't I?"
"Yeah, you are. You absolutely are." Nine soothed. "Took on an entire Dalek fleet and won."
"Twice." Ten told him. "With an army of cybermen thrown in for good measure. All she wants is our safety, nothing else matters to her."
Sixth and the other 'infants' were gaping. "That's...incredible." Four stuttered.
"Yeah. So if we want to go domestic with this little pink and yellow human, and I do, actually, we've got cause." Ten told them firmly.
Eleven nodded. "She's earned her place. Before she even saw the TARDIS, she'd already saved us once."
"True, I save her and she returned the favor...hadn't even seen the TARDIS from the outside yet, never mind inside. She loves us, lads...and she proves it, several times. She's a great deal more than a companion or assistant." Nine told them. "Soulmate, that's our Rose."
"And she won't hesitate to accept all of me. The ones she's met, the ones she's meeting now and the ones she hasn't yet...doesn't matter to her in the slightest which me it is with her...she gets it, see. Never answers questions she knows you shouldn't ask. So she can actually be with any me." Eleven moved to the others who knew Rose well, forming a triangle around her and reaching out to tickle her foot after removing her left shoe.
"Well, in that case...we can't leave her here. Had the metacrisis survived, that would be one thing, but we can't just leave her here without us." Five stated firmly. "And I think I can speak for the rest of you when I say I want my turn with her."
"We solved the stars issue already..." Ten was looking sadly at the back of Rose's head. "So..."
"Trying to get home. Wasn't anyone to babysit, and I'd done it already so I knew how. Just a last shopping trip before launch."
"Ah." He reached over to run a hand through her hair. "Poor little darling. I really screwed up, didn't I?"
"It's okay." She sighed, finally moving away from Nine, taking back her shoe, putting it on and then getting to her feet. She went to the open stall door and waited while they got to their own feet and followed after her.
"No, it's not. Not at all, not even close, actually." Ten disagreed, holding the stable door open for the others. "But it will be. I don't know who told River my name, but from me being here I can assume it wasn't me. Which means it was probably you, Rose Tyler. Cuz, you are smart and sneaky enough to do that." He let the door shut after the last of him was past and followed the line up to Rose's home.
Eleven raised his head like a hound scenting prey. "I haven't married River yet. Now, I don't have to, because Ten is correct...Rose is smart and sneaky enough to do that." He told himself as she opened the front door and held it for the Doctor's many parts to enter.
"She doesn't have to know it's a name, just give it to her as a...password. Does the job, doesn't it. 'Course, you're gonna have to tell me what it is, first, for that to work, don't you?" She told the eldest of him, as she entered behind them, closing the door.
"Been hoping for this for while now..." She ran her fingers over Nine's jaw, then through 11th's hair. "Which one...or really, why settle for one. You're all mine."
"Yeah. Yeah, we are." Ten answered hoarsely, from across the room.
"Anyone hungry? For people food...instead of cracked corn and rolled oats..."
""Well, yes. It would." Eleven nodded, continuing the conversation instead of replying to the comment about eating livestock feed. "Yes, sneaky, smart and overprotective as hell, is our Rose."Yes. Yes it does mean that I'll have to tell you first."
"A chorus of "AYE!" answered her food inquiry, making it hard to hear him. She managed though, poking his side with a finger, "Which by the way, for such little things you lot sure ate a lot of last night." She teased, enjoying their expressions.
"Could've kept that last bit to yourself, Rose." Nine grumbled.
She casually ran an arm around the waist of one of his past lives that had not yet spoken, an old, old man with a cane. "Come along then, Doctor. Let's get some food in you and I'll set you close to the heating vent." She ignored the scowl he handed her as she put him in a very comfortable chair, nearest as promised, the heat. "You stay right there. I'll bring you an almost proper breakfast."
"Almost?"
"Yeah. No potatoes. This universe doesn't have any." There was a sadness in her eyes at this pronouncement before she brightened a bit. "But it has other, very good things and I've tried to adjust to the lack of chips in my life. That hasn't been easy...love chips I do."
"Aye, she does. Poor Rose, stuck here without potatoes." Nine sighed. "But, you'll be in home London soon enough...and once we've got you on one of the TARDIS', she'll have some for you."
"Not your's. You said you already had younger me. Pardon if I take what time I have with you here. Love all of you, but I could wish next you had more of a set, y'know? Needs to grow a pair, that you."
"OI!" Ten yelled, offended. "I can adjust that, you know!"
She crossed her arms and just looked at him. "Best get that started then, so we can make adjustments before the shite hits the fan and we're all, the lot of us, busy."
Nine stared at her. "Break down in some areas of the design, I suppose."
"Somethin' like that, yeah." She did glare a bit at Nine then. "If you were gonna design next you for me, why'd you tone down the testosterone...I love your testosterone levels."
"Ah." First groaned. "Too much information, my dear."
"So, lock it up for later." Six sniped. "She's our bonded, First...she has the right to ask us to adjust some of our hormone levels."
"True, very true." Third smiled, giving Rose a light hug. "Though it's not often a bonded wants that particular one raised."
"Used to be human, now...I'm something else, but yes, the higher level is preferred. I like you as deeply male...see? Not...maybe yes, maybe no or maybe only sometimes."
"Oi..." Ten groused. "M'not that bad."
"Yes, you are." Eleven disagreed. "Remember being that you, after all."
"Pretty boy." Nine nodded. "I get it. Sorry about that, Rose."
"OI"!
"Pretty doesn't have to mean feminine, does it? Although, really, I think my mum had a bigger set than..." Rose broke off what she was about to say, knowing how Nine was likely to react. She was right, suddenly there were subtle improvements in Ten's 'design'. "Oh good, thank you." She told Nine, grabbing both ears and hauling him down for a reward kiss. A nice wet one. "Been wanting to do that since that whole Dalek thing. I won't, though, so I'd appreciate it if you did."
"Rose..."
"It's just a tiny rewrite, Nine...but we would be a lot more stable." Eleven told him quietly. "Do it before you regenerate, please."
"Seriously."
"Yeah." Ten and Eleven chorused.
"I'll...think about it."
**TBC**