Why Ed shouldn't shop for clothes...

Warning: Genderswitch that I blame entirely on aino hikaru from a drawing on her livejournal at http:// hikaru9. live journal. com 50959. ht ml ? view 772623 # t772623 (ignore the spaces.)

"You're full of it, Ed," Roy said, yelling back.

"You already said your uniform's falling off of you now," the blond said. "And that was all I could find."

"It can't possibly be all you can find," Roy snapped back, voice squeaking just slightly.

"Well…" Ed looked down at his fingernails. "I did see a miniskirt in the shop."

"I am not wearing all of this," Roy said, sounding quite adamant.

"Well, if you want the world to realize what an alchemy accident did to 'The Great Roy Mustang, Ladies Man and Sex God,' that's fine with me, but they'll know something's wrong with it, and I'm sure that all of Central will be looking at you more closely. They'll figure it out you know."

"Then you should have grabbed something else, something I'd be more comfortable in."

"You're just going to have to sell what you've got. It's all I'm bringing you."

"You're a damned sadist, Fullmetal!" Roy yelled, voice sounding somewhat constricted.

"No, though I do believe strongly in revenge. Bet it will make you reconsider calling me shrimp ever again." Ed straightened his coat.

"I swear to you, once you get my body back to normal, I'm killing the guy who messed up that transmutation, then I'm going after you."

Ed snickered. "Not much incentive for me to fix you up then, is there?" he said, tauntingly back.

"I. Hate. You."

Ed rolled his eyes. "Are you dressed and ready, my date?" Ed asked.

"I'm dressed and ready to kill you."

"Do you have the hat on?"

There was a soft thud on the other side of the door. "It's on."

"Well, then, come out. Or else, we're going to miss the train west to the only alchemist who
can help me fix you," Ed said.

Roy opened the door, revealing his now-female body clad in clothing Ed had been told was Lolita style, and as Ed had a natural gothic tendency, he'd chosen a lot of black, except for the little bit of blue on the corset and the single blue bow on the angry colonel's chest—complete with breasts, the irony of it all. Well, and a white apron. He kind of liked the look of a maid. "I'm going to burn your balls off if I can find them on your shrimp of a body," Roy swore.

"You know," Ed said, "I was going to resize your ignition cloth gloves to fit your pretty little hands, but I don't think I want to do that now."

"Little hands or not, they can still strangle you," Roy growled, his voice about an octave higher than his old one.

"Does you no good until I get your body back." Ed reached up to the top hat perched on the head of black hair, tipping it just slightly to the side. "Can't have you wearing it like a man would, now."

Coal black eyes with long, thick eyelashes narrowed at the teen, who was currently looking at Roy. "Do you think you can manage to look somewhat comfortable in that?" Ed asked.

"How's this?" Roy struck a quick pose.

"You sure you've never experimented with women's clothes before? You seem like a natural."

At that, the black-clad hands reached up to the back of Ed's neck, and longer fingernails dug into the sensitive flesh through the gloves. "Come on, dear, you have to get me to the west. Now."

"Yes, ma'am," Ed said, timidly as he was opening the door. Now, he was the one who had to try to look comfortable, as a nearly natural Roy led him from the room, hand never moving from his place beneath the braid at the young man's neck.