Harry and Ron set off for the Forbidden forest in silence. They were angered at each others stupidity. It was all Ron's fault. Stupid Ron. If he hadn't been so foolish and…

…gotten caught kissing Draco in the library, then Harry wouldn't have tried to jump from the Astronomy Tower. Now they were all 'meeting' with Dumbledore to 'talk' about what…

…spell the bisexual Draco Malfoy had used. Draco had been known for his affair with Crabbe during the time he was going with Pansy Parkinson. Harry had proved his love for Ron by attempted suicide, but Ron was under a spell from Draco, he loved someone else. Harry tapped Ron's shoulder…

…and said "You stupid fool." Ron turned around and a raging wrestle began.

"Get off me you sick freak." Ron cried.

"Ron, no" Harry quickly ran towards Hagrid's hut. Ron, meanwhile ran back up to Dumbledore's castle. On his way, he accidentally bumped into…

…Hermione. Who took one look at Ron's upset face and sighed.

"I'm sorry," She said.

"About what?" Ron asked confused.

"Well, you see…" She began. "This has all been a misunderstanding. Draco is the only gay bloke around here- he cast the spell on you, and Ginny and I cast the spell on Harry to get back at him for rejecting Ginny."

"You *this has kindly been censored *!!" Cried out Ron, "I've got to find Harry!" He turned and ran down the…

…Hallway. And out of the castle. He caught up with Harry, half way to their destination.

"Harry," He called. Harry turned. "it was all Draco's fault," Ron shouted, "he put a spell on me. Then Hermione and Ginny put a spell on you, to get back for rejecting Ginny." Ron said quickly.

"Oh that's…

..Why I felt attracted to him." Harry quickly apologized to Ron and ran back to the Gryffindor tower. "CURSE YOU!" He yells at…

…Hermione. "CURSE YOU!" She shouted back.

"Why? What did I do?" Harry shouted.

"You broke Ginny's heart!" Hermione shrieked.

"no, I didn't." He shouted back, "Did I?" He continued puzzled.

Just then, Ginny entered the room, and on seeing Harry and Hermione shouting at each other squeaked and ran out the door.

"Ginny, WAIT!" Harry called after her.

She kept running until she almost fainted from tiredness. Then she stopped, staring face to face with…

…Harry,

"Ginny, I," Harry puffed.

"Go away," Ginny shouted, out of breath.

Harry stepped closer to her. "Ginny, I am so sorry," Harry began, he put his hand on her cheek, "I had no idea," He whispered. They leant close to each other with their eyes locked,

They both closed their eyes as Harry stuffed his tongue down the girl's throat in a homicidal outburst.

"Oh my God."

"You're an awfully good tongue-hockey player."

"Same for you."

"I'm sorry Ginny, I should have realized my love and followed my heart and gone for Millicent!"

"WHAT?"

"Relax…I'm just kidding. I should have gone for you in the beginning."

"Oh Harry…" They kissed again. Just then there was a scraping noise.

"My sweet…" Filch's voice floated through the hall. Harry cursed.

"Filch is here. Hide!" He whispered, pushing Ginny and himself into a cupboard. "He's probably looking for Mrs. Norris." Just then, footsteps could be heard. "OH MY GOD! He's meeting with…

McGonagal!"

"Oh Argus!" Professor McGonagal said softly. Filch was obviously grinning.

"Come into my office my sweet." He directed.

"Ofcourse,

Let me grab Dumbledore first! It'll be more fun!"

"Okay, I'll grab Snape, Trewlaney, Hagrid and the rest! Looking forward to it…"

They left each other and took down opposite corridors.

"Goodbye my sweet."

Harry looked at Ginny.

"What the hell is going on?"

"I don't know, but why is your hand touching my…

Gluteals?" Ginny responded, "Not that I mind ofcourse…" She continued.

"Oh sorry!" Harry said, " I thought it was mine. It did seem a little big-"

"Are you saying I have a big bum?" Ginny demanded.

"Uh-no, not at all. I-" He was cut off by

noise behind them.

"What the hell?" Ron's voice said loudly.

"Ron! Be quiet!" Ginny hissed, Ron and Hermione must have decided to use the cupboard, it had two doors either side of it.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Harry asked.

"And you?" Ron said, glaring from Ginny to Harry.

"We were hiding from-" Ginny stuttered. Ron was on it like a dart.

"A likely story!"

"And you and Hermione?"

"Studying."

"In a cupboard? Sure."

"SSH! Someone's coming." Everyone was quiet, although you couldn't miss these footsteps.

"Aye! McGonagal's comin' soon, I thinks. I'll be waiting for ye in there, Argus. We is gonna have some fun!"

"Oh good God, what on earth is happening in there?!?" Harry said.

"Hey, what's everyone doing in here?" A voice startles them.

"Yeah," A nearly identical voice continued. Fred and George Weasley stood behind Harry, Ginny, Ron and Hermione.

"Shhh!" The four responded. "Were spying on the teachers." They watched as they all filed into Filch's office. Soon, there were giggles from the room and

the students looked purely disgusted.

"Yuck!" Cried Ginny, Harry pulled her to his side.

"OI!" Ron hissed, pulling his sister off Harry, "Leave her alone!" He said. Hermione kicked him and he stepped out of the cupboard, he

threw a tantrum, right there and then.

"Damn you Hermy!" He walked off in a pout.

"Poor"

"Ronnikins." The twins chorused.

Harry closed the cupboard door and just in time because

The door to Filch's office began to slowly creak open. The noise grew louder and Hagrid bellowed out.

"OH YEAH!" I

think you could try harder!"

Harry squirmed inside, 'What on earth was going on?' He was even more surprised to hear

Dumbledore shout, "I am trying! Push me!"

"Ew! Ew! Ew! I so need a cold shower," Wailed Ginny.

"So do i." Harry said.

"But not together." Ron sternly said.

"Ron, what are you doing in here? How did you get in?"

"The cupboard actually has three entrances."

"Oh my God."

"But guess what I saw whilst I was out there!"

"What? What?" They asked intrigued.

"Actually, what I heard."

"What? TELL US RON!"

"Hagrid said, "Snape, Stop playing with my dog"!"

"You mean Fang…or his…"

"The later…"

"Oh good lord, what the hell is going on in there?"

"Hey where did Fred and George go?"

"I don't know, maybe they-"

"Shake those things!" McGonagal suddenly shrieked with laughter.

"Oh gosh!" Hermione looked green. Very green. Suddenly, there was a loud explosion. Fred and George had let off some wet-start, no-heat Filibuster's fireworks.

"Oh Filch! You love adding excitement, don't you?" McGonagal laughed.

"But

It wasn't me!" He said as if she was attacking him.

"Admit it Argus! You make fireworks on PURPOSE!" McGonagal accused.

"Let's go!" Ginny pleaded.

"NO!" Ron said, they all looked at him. "I-er-

Want to see it done….for you know…future preference…"

They all looked at him in disgust.

"I'm sick of this, I have to go, I have to see what they're doing, they can't be you know…it's not possible."

Harry walked out and carefully peeping around the door, he shrieked

Loudly. The teachers stared up in shock. There was an awkward silence.

"What's happening?" Hermione whispered.

"Dunno," Ginny responded. "Look at the look on Harry's face, Do you think they're naked?"

"Don't gross me out."

"Okay," Hagrid said, "Who invited Harry? McGonagal…Trying to get in tough with the Gryffindor's? Very well, Come on Harry. You can play with my dog. I'm having a break." Harry smiled and entered the room.

"Enough is enough!" Hermione hissed. She walked out of the cupboard and stared at the door. "THIS IS HARRASMENT WAIT TILL THE MINISTRY HEARS ABOUT THESE SEXUAL VIOLATIONS-" She stopped as she saw what they were doing.

"Oh my god, you're playing monopoly…"

~ The End ~

Brought to you by the crazy minds of the Funky Fairies.