DISCLAIMER: I do not own CSI or any of its components.

And that's when I knew it was true. I was right all along, which is a first to begin with. Of all the times I've been completely off-base, the one time I actually know what's best for me is concerning the one thing that's completely unattainable. Part of me is sure that I've known all along where I stand, but out of hesitation to accept the truth, I've just convinced myself otherwise. But now - after today, this moment - I can't even fool myself anymore, which has grown to be one of my finest talents.

I can't even remotely find the words to describe the wrenching pain that surges through my stomach and the sting my eyes feel when they sudden fill with forbidden tears. I quickly dry my eyes as I realize that I'm standing in the middle of the hallway. Even though it's nearing the end of my shift, the last thing I need is for Grissom to interrogate me about my emotions and to startle Catherine out of her apparent oblivion. She must really be out of it to not only be crying at work, but with her office door open enough for anyone to look in and see.

After drying any evidence of tears from my eyes, I take a deep breath and spend the next few minutes contemplating whether or not this is really the wise thing to do. I know that Catherine and I have reached a point of more or less civility, but I would be exaggerating to say that I'm one of her favorite people. I've always thought that the key to our friendship, or lack thereof, is communication, and the fact that we haven't talked about things that have for quite some time needed to be discussed has put up a road block between the two of us. So, I guess if I walk away right now instead of being brave and talking to her, then I'll only have myself to blame for not being able to achieve a relationship with Catherine like I've always desired. Plus, if I don't step in, then Warrick or Nick or someone else will, and I want that person to be me, even if Catherine doesn't.

I cool off my face with my palms and lift a somewhat trembling hand to quietly knock on Catherine's door. She nervously jumps from her desk and retreats to the corner, frantically wiping her tear-streaked cheeks as if she thought it would erase what I just saw.

"Uh, Sara, hi. Come on in," she says, trying to remain casual. Even if I hadn't seen her crying, I wouldn't have been able to miss the pain etched clearly in her breathtaking blue eyes.

I spend a moment trying to think of an excuse for why I came in there, but I decided that the truth would probably be the best foot to start off on. "Are you okay?" I ask, surprised that I have a voice at all.

"What do you mean? Of course I'm okay?" Catherine says, and it pains me once again to see her fake smile as opposed to a natural one.

I feel tears begin to form behind my eyes again, but I blink them back. I know Catherine doesn't think the world of me, but she can't think I'm this stupid, can she? "Catherine," I say softly yet strongly all at once, assuring her that we both know the state she was just in moments ago.

She looks up at me from across the room, her eyes conveying the message that she doesn't know why she feels safe with me, but she does - right before she starts to cry again, this time harder than before. All I can hear is sharp intakes of air behind the hands that guard her face, and I slowly move closer to her side of the room, sitting on the edge of her desk while she stays pressed up against the wall.

"Talk to me," I urge her, extending a hand to touch her shoulder, and then making a face at my own surprise with myself. When did I all of a sudden become so brave? It was crazy to me how Catherine could manage to make me feel strong and weak simultaneously.

Breathing harshly, she says almost all at once, "I screwed up the last 3 cases, Lindsey's been acting distant, I've been feeling over-emotional and depressed at random intervals, and it just seems like everything is falling apart."

I inhale deeply and move even closer to her, moving a strand of hair that is sticking to her cheek out of the way. Before I can say another word, Warrick peeks his head around the door that I thought I had closed. Before anyone panics, I grab a tissue from the desk and put it up against Catherine's left eye.

"I tried to warn you that you were holding that pen a little too close to your face," I blurt out, barely being able to believe that I used that sorry of an excuse. Catherine even raises her eyebrows and almost smiles at how flushed I've become.

Miraculously, Warrick somehow buys my pathetic excuse and says, "I'll go get you some ice," before exiting the office.

She and I share a shy smile, and I know she is going to thank me before she says it. "Thanks for covering," she says, beginning to loosen up and move away from the corner. I turn my body to face her to where she moves. In a few minutes, I had already broken a boundary that before was so unbreakable between Catherine and I. I decide to take this newfound bravery and try my luck once more.

"So, shift's just about over. Do you want to maybe grab some coffee and talk about things?"

For a moment, she looks like she is going to make my week and say yes. But then she hesitates. "Uh, that's probably not the best idea, Sara," she begins, "I should go home and spend some time with Lindsey and just take it easy for the night."

I nod and try to make it look like my heart didn't just shatter in the blink of an eye. "That's okay, I understand. Maybe some other time then."

Catherine softly smiles, the look on her face suggesting that part of her wants to take me up on my offer. But the reality of the matter is she didn't, and suddenly I need to go.

I nearly slam into Warrick on my way out of Catherine's office, not even pausing to say good bye. Yes, I definitely knew it was true – from the moment I saw Catherine Willows cry, I knew I loved her.