My Fault
by blondie
cdiminyatz@hotmail.com
Please review…I'm warning u though…this is my first ER fanfic…
*this is supposed to take place after Ella took Rachel's ecstasy and is in the hospital.*
I am an idiot. Worse than that even. Idiots are just stupid, but their stupidity doesn't endanger other people! Let alone their own baby sister…
I sat in an empty exam room and hid in a corner. I hadn't turned on the light because I didn't want to see where I had gotten myself into. I didn't deserve the light anyway.
I hadn't even planned on taking it. I had just grabbed the left-overs from a party a few days ago. I remembered how everyone had smiled at the girl who had brought it, even the people who didn't take it. She didn't even take any, but she got the glory of it. She told me later that she had never actually been high, but she got this high-like feeling from seeing the happiness it brought others.
"I'm the Mother Teresa of the stoned high school parties." Then she smiled and gave me what was left from that night.
I could blame her if I wanted to. I could blame Elizabeth for being sick. I could even blame Ella for putting everything in her mouth…but I wasn't going to. I wasn't planning on taking the easy way out.
"SHE COULD'VE DIED! SHE COULD STILL DIE!"
My father's words rang in my ears. I remembered him asking if I was on drugs or had even tried them. The thousands of talks we had had about it. Him casually mentioning at the dinner table an OD he had worked on earlier that day.
But still I am an idiot.
I got myself into this undesirable position. My first thought was to get out of it the quickest way possible.
But I didn't want to leave my father with anymore burdens such as a funeral.
I did have to die for my stupidity though. Nowadays things were too complicated; you kill someone-you get five years to life depending on the circumstances; you attempt to kill someone- five years to life depending on the circumstances.
I have no idea what they do for manslaughter nowadays. But in past they just killed you, or cut off your hand, or put you in the stocks for a few days.
They most likely killed you for manslaughter or possible manslaughter.
I sat in my corner with my knees brought up to my chest and thought out my plan. I had to die-yes that definitely needed to happen, but first I had to get away from Chicago. I needed to get a few cities away, preferably a few states.
I needed to get some place where no one knew me…someplace where I would just be another Jane Doe.
And I needed to get there fast.
*~*~*~*~* Author's Note-I'll only write the next chapter if I get FIVE REVIEWS for this one. So please review-even if it's just to say that it sucked and is unrealistic.
by blondie
cdiminyatz@hotmail.com
Please review…I'm warning u though…this is my first ER fanfic…
*this is supposed to take place after Ella took Rachel's ecstasy and is in the hospital.*
I am an idiot. Worse than that even. Idiots are just stupid, but their stupidity doesn't endanger other people! Let alone their own baby sister…
I sat in an empty exam room and hid in a corner. I hadn't turned on the light because I didn't want to see where I had gotten myself into. I didn't deserve the light anyway.
I hadn't even planned on taking it. I had just grabbed the left-overs from a party a few days ago. I remembered how everyone had smiled at the girl who had brought it, even the people who didn't take it. She didn't even take any, but she got the glory of it. She told me later that she had never actually been high, but she got this high-like feeling from seeing the happiness it brought others.
"I'm the Mother Teresa of the stoned high school parties." Then she smiled and gave me what was left from that night.
I could blame her if I wanted to. I could blame Elizabeth for being sick. I could even blame Ella for putting everything in her mouth…but I wasn't going to. I wasn't planning on taking the easy way out.
"SHE COULD'VE DIED! SHE COULD STILL DIE!"
My father's words rang in my ears. I remembered him asking if I was on drugs or had even tried them. The thousands of talks we had had about it. Him casually mentioning at the dinner table an OD he had worked on earlier that day.
But still I am an idiot.
I got myself into this undesirable position. My first thought was to get out of it the quickest way possible.
But I didn't want to leave my father with anymore burdens such as a funeral.
I did have to die for my stupidity though. Nowadays things were too complicated; you kill someone-you get five years to life depending on the circumstances; you attempt to kill someone- five years to life depending on the circumstances.
I have no idea what they do for manslaughter nowadays. But in past they just killed you, or cut off your hand, or put you in the stocks for a few days.
They most likely killed you for manslaughter or possible manslaughter.
I sat in my corner with my knees brought up to my chest and thought out my plan. I had to die-yes that definitely needed to happen, but first I had to get away from Chicago. I needed to get a few cities away, preferably a few states.
I needed to get some place where no one knew me…someplace where I would just be another Jane Doe.
And I needed to get there fast.
*~*~*~*~* Author's Note-I'll only write the next chapter if I get FIVE REVIEWS for this one. So please review-even if it's just to say that it sucked and is unrealistic.