Based on "Your Side of The Bed by Trey Songz, though the story is based more on the videos than the song. There are many similarities, I took the same idea and turned it into Sasunaru. Really there's not much of a difference except mines has a happy ending.

Disclaimer: I ownz nothing

Not beta'd

January

I watch as he pulls a single duffel bag from the trunk of my car a thin bead of sweat running down the back of his neck that my eyes were quick to trace until it disappeared down the collar of his shirt. Such weather at such a time of the year was rare and I found myself itching to climb back inside of my car to enjoy the luxury of air-conditioning but a clenching in my chest only reminded me that I couldn't take him with me. He was mines and yet I had no choice but to share him, not just with the child that sat comfortably in my arms, our child. I had to share him with all of America, but as he had said this was his duty.

The sound of a trunk slamming shut brought me back to attention. It was time for him go. He had only just returned from his break and already they were sending him back overseas away from the safety of my arms to dangers unknown to me that I couldn't protect him from. Walking over to me he stands on the tip of his toes to placing a lingering kiss to Hiro's forehead which he gladly accepted with a giggle. But me, I was a completely different story. I growled at the chaste kiss he lands on my lips and that infuriating smile he offers that clearly stated that he was going to be fine. I grab him back before be could step out of my reach and crashed my lips to his in an furious kiss before before trailing my nose down his jaw to a tanned neck littered with vicious love bites that I had made the night before. I had clearly delivered to him the fear and dread that i held in the pit of my stomach to the very pit of of his with each thrust last night as I made love to him over and over again until we had no energy left for more.

"Naruto!"

I sigh at the sound of his commander calling for him. It was time for him to leave. I rested my head atop his golden spikes and closed my eyes savoring every second of his presence. "Sasuke I-"
"-Idiot, don't make any promises to me that you can't keep." My voice was a mere whisper I felt so drained that it was all I could manage, this was something I would never get used to.
"I love you Sasuke."

"As I love you." I let him go unwilling and like every other time it was the hardest thing I ever had to do. It felt like I was handing him over to the very fate that for him I feared most. And as he's walking away he turns one last time smiling a beautiful smile that I stored in my mind for future upliftings. I give him a small smile of my own in return lifting Hiro's small hand to my lips before flinging it Naruto's way blowing him a kiss before shaking it in the air in a departing wave. The sound of his laughter eased my heart if only just a little and he returned our kiss before turning to walk the few steps to the car that awaited him. I stood there and watched all until the car disappeared from site down the dusty road its glossy metal glittering in the sunlight.

It was always only when I was absolutely sure that he couldn't see that I let them fall. Runaway tears dotted the sand around my feet as I held my head low because only God knew if I would ever see him again. Naruto, my wife, the mother of my child, my little soldier.

March

Sleep never did come easy. I often had nightmares revolving around funerals and a golden mane resting peacefully inside of a coffin and gun shots banged and echoed loud inside my head. So in a way I was thankful when Hiro started wailing, the sound ringing from the baby monitor lying on my nightstand. Nights like these were frequent. Hiro was restless and I didn't want to sleep. I could only think of the sleeping conditions Naruto was in right now if he was getting any sleep at all. I could remember when Naruto had gotten pregnant. I was joyous not only for the life growing in his stomach but I thought that Naruto would resign and stay so I could have my perfect family. I had gotten a rude awakening when weeks after the birth of my son, Naruto happily declared that he was granted the rest of the year off before he had to resign his contract and head back overseas. This, of course had led to our biggest argument yet. I was bemused. How could he think of leaving me to raise our child on my own. I ended up sleeping on the couch but when I opened my eyes to the sunlight streaming in through the windows I found him lying on my chest and I was surprised to find that he wasn't bothered by the bruising grip I had around his waist.

I walked around my room with a hysterical Hiro in my arms and a glance at the alarm clock told me that it was three in the morning. His screams were piercing my heart and I suddenly found myself utterly exhausted. Hiro did not want a bottle, he wasn't wet, nor was he sick or in any kind of pain. Hiro wanted his mother. He craved for that maternal touch that I could not give him and it wasn't until an hour later that he was calmed and lying in my arms on my bed. Our eyelids dropped as we fell into an exhausted sleep.

Wasn't it strange that little Hiro was born on July fourth.

May

I woke up sometime around four in the morning at the sound of my laptop alerting me of a video call. I struggled to free myself from the sheets running to my desk in the corner of my room and yanked open my laptop. And there he was as beautiful and as healthy as the day he had left. "Sasuke." The way he greeted my sent my heart fluttering. Naruto sounded so excited like he missed me as badly as I missed him which was saying a lot. I responded my tone breathless and almost disbelieving. "Love."

His smile was so heavenly and I found myself letting go. This video call that I knew would last less than ten minutes would be the only contact that I had with my wife in months so I was going to savor it. Disregarding the fact that if I lost myself in this feeling of happiness the depression would only crash down on my all the worse as soon as he singed off, I lost myself in the conversation. I drowned in every smile I floated with every ,'I love you". I told him how much I missed him and when he asked I lied and told him that I was fine. I new that Naruto knew that I was lying but he didn't comment. He knew from experience that trying to ease my worries were futile. All too soon it was over but I went to sleep that night feeling like a weight had been lifted from my chest. Naruto was alright and the fact that he was able to make this call told me that he was safe if only for the moment. I went to sleep that night with ease that I hadn't felt in months.

July

I decided to throw Hiro a party to celebrate his birthday. What started off as a small get together with both me and Naruto's parents, both our brothers, and their wife's and children led to a houseful of all our friends and their family as a way to celebrate Hiro's birthday and the fourth of July together. It was times like these that I felt closer to Naruto's family. I knew that, inwardly, they were suffering just as I was and though my family loved Naruto also they couldn't possibly share the fear for his safety as a mother, father, brother, and husband could.

I turned my head to see Hiro wobbling to me on chubby legs his arms reaching out to me and his eyes dropping a little showing that he was spent. It had been an exhausting day for him. He had been passed around from family and friends all day and I could not remember seeing him having so much fun. I reached out and took him into my arms deciding to stay for the fireworks that were being prepared before we left for home.

The first set lit up the sky in various colors and almost immediately Hiro raises his head to stare at the sky in awe of all the colors and the way they exploded in the air. He giggled excitedly and clapped his hands together while I just stood there watching him because he was so much more fascinating then the show that had captured every ones attention.

Hiro was my foundation. He was my drive, my support. Something as simple as a smile from my son was all that I needed when all else failed to keep me going. Hiro was the best gift Naruto had ever given me. A little piece of my lover that I could hold close to me when Naruto was thousands of miles away through the night.

October

"Happy birthday love." I did this every year. October Ninth. I would wait up until twelve o one and whisper these words into the air before I went to sleep. I could only be grateful that he made another year.

December

Naruto had made sure that his family was active Christians and had me and Hiro in church every Sunday. For this I was grateful because I knew that there was some higher being who loved and protected Naruto where I couldn't. I prayed every night for my loves' safety and tonight I prayed harder that Naruto would be allowed to return home this Christmas. And every year my prayers were answered.

He comes back to me the same way he left. Me standing by my car only this time it was freezing cold and I couldn't wait to climb back inside to enjoy the luxury of my heater. But I endured it because seeing my love in person for the first time in almost a year was even more worth the wait. And as the first car finally comes to sight I could see the others around me, husbands, wife's, children, and all family and friends alike shift and fidget in excitement as more cars follow each of us eying the glossy metal doors trying to figure out which one held their loved ones.

The cars stop and the doors are thrown open in no time, people scurrying out in a flurry running to loved ones with huge grins splitting their faces in anticipation of the reunion about to take place. Naruto crashes to my side having lunged at me in full speed and now I'm kissing him ferociously with a passion that had been building inside of me for damned near a year unmindful of the blushing faces around us.

They could all kiss my ass if they felt uncomfortable due to my PDA, nothing could rip me away for the sweet taste that was purely Naruto except for the nagging feeling in my chest that demanded air.

The car ride home was full of smiles, whispered sweet nothings, and lingering longing touches. He was back my Naruto was here, he was healthy, he was alive.

January

I cant help it this time. As I lay there nestled between his legs with my face buried in neck, I breath in heavily savoring his scent and not even the aftermath of my release could calm me and send me to sleep peacefully. Time had flew by so fast I could have sworn I had only pick Naruto up just yesterday.
He would be leaving me tomorrow and somewhere deep in my being I knew that he would not be coming back this time. I felt it as if the truth of it was written in my very soul but Naruto wouldn't listen. He never did.

I'm terrified, petrified, shaken and chilled to my very bone. I'm shaking and I know he feels it inside of him. My whole body is trembling and I know he can feel it from where his body is almost completely buried underneath mine. Then I'm crying in anguish my tears mingled with the sweat on his next. I feel his arms wrap around me tightly. He's hushing me and cooing softly in my ear but I refuse to be comforted.

My arms slip under his body so that I could hold him in what had to be a bruising grip and then I'm flipping us over so that I'm sitting with him cradled in my lap. I lean down nestling my nose in his blond locks letting the scent of him consume me completely.

I sob even harder.

I listen intently to his promises and sweet nothings. Not in an effort to aid Naruto's attempts to calm my dying heart, but to savor the sound of his voice.

My tears fall more heavily.

My hands start to wander his body, touching and lingering wherever they reach. Trying to savor the feel of him.

I hold on even tighter.

I have never felt such agony it was as if Naruto was already slipping away. And I know this isn't just another case of my paranoia. Naruto is my everything our souls are one and I could tell better than he could himself.

I whimper helplessly, my chest clenches painfully, I'm drowning in my sorrow and choking on my own tears.

The heart always knows.

Morning

I don't remember falling asleep but when I wake up we're in the same position as last night. I feel like crap. My nose is stuffed, tears still pool in the corners of my eyes and some are dried along my face, semen is dried in between our bodies, and I'm in a desperate need of a aspirin. But all this is ignored as I slowly slide down Naruto's body until my head is resting on his chest listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat.

I sigh in contentment, lingering there for a moment before I sit up carefully in search of Naruto's cell phone. This had become an annual routine for me. Every morning that he was set to leave I would wake up before him, reach over his body and strain my arms trying to reach the orange device sitting on his nightstand.

Naruto set his alarm for seven and was due to depart at nine. The drive to the station took somewhere around forty-five minutes giving Naruto at least an hour to get ready. If you were late you were left behind. My intentions were obvious. With the way I wore Naruto out the night before, the little blonde became heavily dependent on his alarm clock to wake him up so early in the morning.

Every year I would try to cancel his alarm and every year I failed. Naruto, being the light sleeper his job required him to be would always catch me just when the damn phone was in reach and this year proved to be no different.

"Sasuke, what are you doing?" I stiffen and slowly lower my head to meet sky blue eyes gazing up at me in amusement.

Damn!

Sighing in disappointment I lower my body back down to embrace his and give my usual answer. "Stretching."

I watch him intently for any signs that he was about to get up. I wasn't letting him go back and had to decided to hold him here forcefully if necessary. A small smile curved kiss-swollen lips as Naruto watched me, still amused, and nodded his head in the direction of the wall clock hanging just above the entrance of our closet door.

I watched him still, letting my confusion show by a raised eyebrow before turning in his pointed direction.

8:49

My eyes widen at the implication but Naruto spoke before I could. "I'm not resigning my contract Sasuke." Blue eyes catch mine and whatever Naruto saw there must have pleased him because he smiled even wider as he went on. "I know that I can not save the world Sasuke. I understand that some things are beyond my control. But I know my purpose in life, I was born to save lives, to make a difference."

Slowly he sat up, pulling me up with him by a gentle grip on my arm so that we were sitting looking each other on face to face. "But perhaps I was going about it the wrong way. Maybe there are people here who need me to. Homeless people who I could be feeding, abused children I could be freeing, and you and Hiro who I should be here taking care of..."

He trails off slowly and looks away sadly. I could just imagine my episode from last night replaying in his mind and he flinches as he gazes back up at me, his expression sorrowful. "I knew you worried for me but I had no idea you were so...so miserable."

Suddenly I found myself with an armful of Naruto as the blonde clung to me with his arms around my neck a embrace I was quick to return as I pulled him closer by a grip around his waist. "I'm sorry Sasuke, I'm so so sorry."

"You have nothing to apologize for love."

"I make you so unhappy."

"No Naruto, you make me so happy. That's why I want you here safe with me. I cant lose you."

Slowly he pulled back locking his blue eyes to mine. "I'm not going back", he confirmed. I stare back at him for a while, letting the words sink in.

Naruto was here, safe, healthy and alive.

Naruto was here, safe, healthy, alive, and here to stay.

Where he is safe.

In my arms.

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