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The Broken Deck had its usual smattering of regulars at 4:15 in the afternoon. Classes were done, leaving the bar's established late afternoon regulars - three who were perpetually unemployed, and two who were fine parsing out their retirement checks to drink two bourbons during Jeopardy.

Carly, Anu, and Michael came in and sat a few tables down from the five at the bar. They were fulling a wish that all had wanted since the start of the winter semester: to go to a bar in the middle of the afternoon on a weekday. No labs. No assignments. No dissertations.

Carly ordered Dewar's and took a seat between Anu and Michael. She had a decision she had to commit to soon. But right now, she just wanted to savor this moment. This wasn't slumming, but it was an absolutely delicious indulgence. To take a segment of a day that had been shrewdly partitioned out since high school - and flippantly deviate from that routine. Still, there was that element of pure engineering that she couldn't turn off.

"So part of me just wants to say 'screw it' and just keep going on for my doctrine after December. I'm already in a groove, and I know it's only another few years."

She looked at Michael and immediately started to grin.

"But I know people can work and work on their doctrine. I know the economy's getting better. And I've heard from two companies already - one even said they'd move me to San Francisco or Seattle - my choice."

"But I keep on hearing how much stuff changes when you get out of school. I know these companies aren't going to be the type where it'll be your regular 40-hour weeks. It'll be closer to 60. Then, you buy a house. You start doing other things, and all of a sudden, there's no way you can find the time to go back to school. Especially after they told me what my starting salary would be."

Anu massaged her temple.

"Stop it. Stop it Stop it!"

Anu chuckled and looked over at Michael.

"You don't have to fully think through every goddamn scenario to its logical extent. You still have a few months to decide."

She raised her wine to the TV.

"Finals haven't even been over for a week. Relax." Anu looked over at the three at the end of the bar, barely visible by the sunlight coming in. "Just like those guys."

Carly gave a begrudging nod.

"I know…I'm trying. It's just hard not to think about this."

Micheal looked over at Carly and wanted to put his arm across shoulder. Just for a brief moment.

Carly caught a glimpse of Michael's gaze and quickly went back to sipping her Dewar's. She gave a tentative smile and looked at the television, focusing on the Physics category of Jeopardy. Anu opened her mouth to answer the $600 question.

"Oh! Ed - "

"Edward Witten!" Carly called out.

Anu shot Carly a glare. "I was just saying that!"

Carly grinned. It was the distraction she needed.

As an engineer, Carly had spent years focused on absolutes. As a coder, she knew the rules of precision - the slightest misplacement of a character could mean the difference between a program that runs smoothly, and something that just spews out thousands of lines of jibberish.

Those rules applied to the lab world as much as they did in the real world. And that included relationships.

It had been barely a month since she and Spike broke up. As both moved away from their shared experience with the Autobots, the two had fewer and fewer things to talk about. Living on different coasts didn't help matters either. And her pregnancy scare last year brought out the elements of Spike that she had grown more frustrated with. His boyish innocence and naivety, which she once accepted as an endearing quirk had turned into childishness and incompetence as he kept asking her what she was going to do. It was only a scare, but the incident highlighted the hugely divergent paths both were taking in their lives. Their adventures with the Autobots, what had once been the thing that tied them so close together, were becoming more like a footnote in her life.

But those drawn-out final six months between them didn't erase the fact that they had been a couple for more than five years. And every rule of romantic attachment states the last thing one should do after ending a relationship of that length is to venture into another one.

But Michael wasn't an equation. Yes, a relationship this close after a breakup was destined for failure, but Michael provided something that she hadn't had for at least two years with Spike: someone to talk to without a filter. She could talk physics, coding languages, and even the societal ethical implications of the emerging Internet. They could talk for days without so much as mentioning anything related to Transformers. With Michael, who was a year into his own doctrine, she had a respected creative rival as well. She was fine not having their current situation defined as boyfriend and girlfriend, but she also knew she wanted to spend more time with him.

Three months before they broke up, Spike was in town. He hitched a ride with one of the Aerialbots. She took him to a party with a few of her engineering classmates. Michael was also there. And after a few students began peppering Spike with questions about life with the Autobots. He couldn't help but get caught up in the attention of the other MIT students. After telling a story he had told at least 20 times in his life, he motioned Carly over.

"Heyah, you guys know my girlfriend Carly, right?"

Carly winced and recovered. It was true - a fact even. But what should have been a generic statement became a humiliation to her. She wasn't a master's student. She wasn't a fellow engineer with other gifted students from around the world. She was someone's girlfriend. But worse, she realized that she was okay with the label girlfriend. But she had come to the realization that she didn't want to be his girlfriend.

The moment distracted Carly from the next question. Before she could answer, Anu blurted out "Bohr! Niels Bohr!"

Anu snapped her fingers triumphantly.

"And math is your strong suit, Carly!"

Carly laughed. It was a great afternoon it felt like what other non-engineering students must feel.

She had tried her best to not romanticize people who will never be engineers, physicists, or professors. But she had to admit, these moments, she would love to slip into the skin of those who were just fine doing the mandatory four-year collegiate stint, then working as a PR spokesperson somewhere. Getting home at 6 p.m., and unplugging until they have to get up for work the next morning.

Michael finished his beer.

"Another round?" he looked at his friends and fished in his pocket.

"It's on me. This book buyback money has to go to a noble destination."

"Sure," Carly said, finishing her Dewar's and sliding it to the front of the bar. She looked at Anu for confirmation.

"I don't have anywhere to be," Anu said.

The three lost interest in Jeopardy. Sipping her second Dewar's, Carly felt the slightest drop in control. This was her second drink at a bar in one sitting. They didn't have to be anywhere, but it had been so long since she wasn't on an agenda. So the three talked. About the typical "Who's better, Pearl Jam or Nirvana?" debate (all three agreed the correct answer was PJ Harvey). About their roommates. And inevitably, the conversations eventually went back to "shop talk." Try as they did, engineering and physics were so engrained in their DNA that most conversations they had inevitably went back to what they were working on.

Carly nodded to the conversation and briefly looked up at the television. On the television was Spike's high school senior picture.

Carly felt her like form was briefly ripped from her own body and placed beside her for a second before she came to and realized the time. 6:35. At this time, if Spike was on the world news, it couldn't have been because of a routine follow-up interview the media usually requested every year or so. Something had to have happened.

"Turn it up - " Carly pointed to the television.

The bartender looked up from a goblet he was cleaning.

"'scuse me?"

"The TV, turn it up please!"

Anu and Michael looked over at Carly with concern, then looked at the television. As the volume rose, the news filled the still-near empty bar.

"Details are sketchy, but it was believed that Mr. Witwicky was present near where the Autobots are stationed, in their spacecraft 'The Ark' when the Decepticons attacked. Spike and his father, William 'Sparkplug' Witwicky, of course, are believed to be the first humans to establish a relationship with the Autobots, who emerged in 1984 after a volcanic eruption reactivated the spacecraft where they sat dormant for millions of years. Spike Witwicky was 23."

Carly continued to stare at the screen. She heard the words, but the dates below Spike's high school picture gave a conclusive finality. 1970-1993.

"Carly?" Michael looked over at her glassy expression. Anu leaned in and put her hand on Carly's wrist.

Carly looked back up at the screen, but the news about his death had already became an item to move on from.

"The topic of healthcare has quickly become one of the key issues for next year's midterms. Today, Republicans unveiled a new series of ads targeting …"

The news became a fuzzy, echoey drone. Carly found herself trying to force air into her lungs. She then looked at Anu.

"I just saw him four days ago. We each had some things we returned…"

Michael looked from his bar stool to the outside. He would take Carly home, and Anu and him would be with her.

Carly stared at the multi-colored array of bottles from behind the counter. Yes, her grandmother died. Yes, her aunt died from cancer a few years ago. But in terms of facing death's finality directly, she had yet to experience it. Even every Autobot she knew had somehow lived through dozens of brutal battles she's witnessed.

Michael went for his keys.

"Let's get out of here. Let's just go back to your place and we can, Jesus, I don't know what we can do, but let's just get out of here."

Carly gulped and coughed. She looked over at Anu.

"I have to go to Portland."

"I need to be there."

Michael nodded and said "Absolutely, but let's just get you home first."

Carly sighed and said weakly "Fine."

Michael added "I'll drive. We can pick up your car tomorrow."

Carly closed her eyes, the initial shockwave barely registering. "Okay…"

She didn't know where she would stay. She didn't know what Sparkplug would say to her. Would he blame her for this? Would he refuse to talk to her? She couldn't even process any of the scenarios that were thousands of miles away. All she knew was she had to be on a plane to Portland tomorrow.