Hey! Hey! It's A KH Christmas!
Once upon a time, on the Destiny Islands, snow begins to fall. Seizing this opportunity, a silver-haired boy named Riku, decides to have a Christmas bash, and invite all his closest friends. And that's where our story begins.
"Knock knock! Riku open up."
Click Riku unlocked the door. "Sora it's so nice to see you." Riku was wearing a green sweater and red baggy pants and a red Christmas hat with a white trim and elf ears. "Oh I see you brought a date."
"Riku, you know me and Sora don't date. Please don't try to instigate, you know I can't stand instigators." Kairi said before walking past Riku in.
"Nice Sora. You finally got Kairi on a date. Okay guys, Sora's arrived." Riku walked back into his house.
"Riku. It's not like that." Sora mumbled and walked in himself.
"SORA!!" Donald and Goofy shrieked while pouncing on him.
"Hey nice to see you guys too. Now can I get up?"
"Oh sure."
Sora stood up and brushed off his green sweater, then his red baggy pants. "Riku you invited Donald and Goofy? Who else did you invite?"
Knock Knock
"Hold that thought Sora. I'm coming!" Riku shouted to the door.
"Kai, do you know who's at the door?"
"Not the slightest clue. Maybe Selphie, Wakka, or Tidus."
"Hey guys, how was the flight? Not too bad I hope. Come on in."
"Hey Sora!"
"Yuffie?"
"Aren't you glad to see me?"
"Yea well." Sora couldn't finish his sentence.
"Don't you just look so cute in your green sweater? Yes you do. Yes you do." Yuffie was pinching his cheeks.
"Yuffie. Quit it." Aerith urged in a soft spoken voice.
Yuffie broke away from Sora's cheeks. "I was just playing with him, that's all."
"Hehe." Kairi was laughing; Sora saw and felt embarrassed.
Riku spoke up. "Leon. Cloud. Tifa. Where's Cid?"
Tifa responded. "That stick in the mud, he just dropped us off. He said, 'The gummi ship ain't feel 'ight on 'er trip over 'ere. I'm gonna go check er' out.' So he'll probably be back in a few hours. But who needs him."
Leon walked over to the tree in the corner. "Riku is this your tree?" It was a pine tree with no decorations. The tree extended to a couple of inches away from the ceiling. "Where's the decorations?"
"Decorations? Oh that's right. I have decorations in the basement. I was hoping all of us could decorate the tree."
"Oh." Responded everyone.
"Sora give me a hand getting the decorations?"
"Sure."
Sora and Riku began walking down the stairs to the basement.
"So Sora,"
"Yea,"
"Urgh." Riku lifted a box full of decorations and so did Sora. "When are you planning on making your move on Kairi?"
"Riku can you please just drop it?"
"Why?"
"Kairi's just not something I like to talk about."
"Come on. Have your best friend Riku give you some dating advice." They reached the top of the stairs.
"Riku. Just drop it okay?" Sora trailed off towards the Christmas tree.
"If by 'drop it', you mean help you out, then I'll 'drop it.'" Murmured Riku. Riku stepped back into the living room with everyone else. "Okay Sora you can start decorating the left side of the tree. Kairi help him out okay?"
"Okay." Sora scowled at Riku.
"Everyone else can help me with the rest of the tree."
Kairi was putting up red bells on the tree. She tried to put one up by the top but couldn't reach it.
"Need some help Kai?"
She turned around and saw Sora. Her head was very close to his chest. She could see the shape of his muscles poke through the sweater. "Oh sure." She said before turning around, her was face blushing.
Sora squeezed gently around her waist. "Is this too tight?"
"No it's perfect." She said.
Sora slowly levered her up the tree. She placed the bell just below where the star should be. He lowered her back down just as slowly and softly as he levered her up.
"Thanks." She said putting her hair behind her ear. She was breathing harder.
"Kai, are you nervous about something? You only push your hair behind your hair when your nervous or anxious. Which is it?"
The blush on her face began to to fade a little. "Your so dense Sora."
"Mistletoe!" Riku had his arm over Kairi and Sora and in it was a mistletoe.
"Riku lay off!" Sora shouted.
"Sora, it's okay." Kairi walked even closer to a red-faced Sora and kissed his cheek.
"Aw," The guys remarked sarcastically.
"Cute." The girls remarked sincerely.
"Well well." Responded Cloud.
"Lovely." Responded Aerith.
"Ahuck." Responded Goofy.
"Guy conference. Quick! Riku grab Sora." Leon announced. Riku immediately dropped the mistletoe on the floor and grabbed Sora against his will and brought him over to Leon and Cloud.
"Lady conference. Quick! Tifa grab Kairi." Yuffie yelled. Tifa carried Kairi back over to Yuffie with one arm. Donald, Goofy and Aerith were excluded from both conferences.
"Look Sora, you already messed-up." Leon said.
"That's right." Riku added in. "You were suppose to kiss her, not the other way around."
"The way I see it," Leon continued, " the only way to reclaim your dominance is to go kiss her on the lips."
"Guys guys, I really appreciate it, but I don't want your help."
"Come on Sora just take it." Remarked Riku. "We are guys that have been on way more dates than you."
"Hey I've been on dates!"
"How many and any with Kairi?"
"Zero and none with Kairi."
"That's what I thought."
"But if two people are suppose to be together then they will end up together right?"
Leon responded. "Sora, that's cute you still think that way, but grow up. That never happens. Tell him Cloud."
Cloud opened his eyes and got up from slouching on the wall. "Sora," Cloud began in a deep and enthralling voice, "at some point you must take action." Cloud then rested his eyes again and laid his back against the wall.
"Not quite what I wanted you to say but that works."
"Kairi," Tifa started, "you know what your problem is? You're too nice. You have to man up or you'll just be walked on, and walked on, and walked on, and walked on, aND WALKED ON!!!" Tifa was stomping her feet harshly against the ground. Kairi was scared and almost started to run away.
"Easy tiger." Yuffie said trying to calm down Tifa. Tifa regained her composure and took a step back. "I think what Tifa was trying to say was, if you're too nice, guys will walk all over you. So just remember to man up and in an argument through back whatever they say right back at them, even if there right."
"Isn't that a little mean." Kairi spoke up.
"No." Tifa answered. "It's a dog eat dog world. Relationships are no different."
"I like Sora and isn't that enough? If two people are suppose to be together then they'll end up together right? Right?"
"HAHahAHAh!" Tifa and Yuffie laughed.
"That's the stupidest thing I ever heard." cried Tifa. "Now go get 'em." Tifa pushed Kairi into the center of the room.
"Oh and don't let him kiss you unless he has your permission." Added Yuffie. "Look at her Tifa. Our girl's growing up."
"So Sora go kiss her." Riku said and pushed Sora into the center of the room.
"Um Kairi," Sora was blushing.
"Yes," Kairi responded equally as timid and shy.
Sora licked his lips and moved forward toward Kairi's lips.
"Excuse me." Kairi said.
"What?"
"Did I give you permission?"
"Permission?"
"Since when did I need permission?"
"Since I decided I don't want your crusty lips on mine!"
"What?"
"You heard me."
"Of course I heard you. Everyone heard you roaring."
"Roaring? What am I? A beast?"
"Well you ain't no goddess."
"Ha! Your no god! Or even a man. Just a boy with a little muscle. And when it comes to muscle, Riku's got you beat."
"Hey she mentioned my name." Riku nudged on Leon's arm happily.
" A little muscle? You have little breasts. In fact I can't even see them. Where are they Kairi? Did you leave them at home?"
"Ah." Kairi shrieked. She fell to the ground and a tears fell down her eye.
"Stop it everyone!" Aerith yelled. "Leave Kairi and Sora alone. Can't you see the trouble you caused them already?"
"Yeah." Donald joined in. "This is suppose to be a Christmas party, yet it doesn't seem very Christmasy."
The room was silent. Goofy was eager to change the subject. "So Riku, where's the food."
"The food. I already ordered Pizza Hut pizza about 30 minutes ago so it should be ready. So Sora go pick it up please, I'll give you the money. The order name is I.C. Weiner."
"Why can't you go? It's your party."
"Exactly, I have to stay here."
"Fine. Give me the money."
Riku reached in his pocket and pulled out a roll of bills. "This should be enough to cover it. I want the receipt and I want my change."
"Fine." Sora left looking at Kairi on the floor.
Riku held out a hand for her to get up. She took it and got up herself but yanked Riku on the ground. She held out a hand of her own and whispered to Riku in a violent rage, but with a smile. "You'll pay for instigating. Just to let you know why for later." Riku looked puzzled but nonetheless took her hand.
-
On Destiny Islands, it was snowing and cold. Pizza Hut was a little ways away. Sora had a lot of time to himself. He was bored for a while until he had a visitor come. However, Sora was a little more touchy than the visitor perceived.
'I don't understand, what I did wrong. I was doing what they told me to do. I hope Kairi's okay.'
"And she will be."
"Who's there?" Sora turned around nervously looking for someone.
"Right here, in front of you."
"I can't see you, who are you?"
"Don't tell me you've forgotten me? Roxas."
"Roxas." Sora blinked. And when he opened his eyes Roxas was there in front of him wearing an identical green sweater and red baggy pants. "Oh Roxas it's you. Sorry I forgot about you."
"I don't know how. I'm always with you."
"I guess. So why did you stop by?"
"To tell you ignore what the guys said. I think a more direct approach than what you were doing before would have been better, but what you were doing before was working. After all, if two people are suppose to be together then they will end up together right?"
"Now your giving me Kairi advice too?"
"I deserve to be heard and acknowledged. After all you didn't just hurt Kairi's feelings but Naminé's feelings too."
"I see. But that's not what they seem to think about two people."
"What they said caused Kairi to cry. I share your emotions I know you didn't want that. Don't let them tell you what to think. You always believed that if two people are suppose to be together then they will end up together."
"How would you know? You don't share my memories, you're only my Nobody."
Roxas scowled. "Kiss my white ass." Roxas scorched, and with that he left.
"Maybe that was a little too harsh," Sora meditated. "and he means my white ass."
At Riku's house it was quiet minus the few conversations that loomed. People resumed putting up decorations waiting for Sora to arrive home with pizza. Stomach's growled especially Goofy's.
"Garwsh. I sure hope Sora gets here with that pizza fast. I'm starting to hallucinate." Goofy spoke.
"We could talk to pass by time." Aerith walked next to Goofy.
"Ok."
"So Goofy I was walking past Hollow Bastion the other day and I saw the weirdest thing."
"Here it is!" Donald shouted. He found a ribbon that needed to be hung. He walked behind Aerith, and in front of Goofy's eyes, on his walk towards the tree.
"So anyway Goofy..."
'Donald looks real good right now. '
"...in the flower garden there was Cloud..."
'I wonder how he would taste with a little salt n' pepper.'
"...I think he was picking flowers..."
'Or slow grilled with a touch of lemon.'
"Goofy are you listening?"
Goofy snapped back into the conversation. "Oh yeah, sorry."
"He might have been getting flowers for Tifa..."
'Donald why are you dressed up like a turkey sandwich?'
"I can't be sure but... oh hey Donald."
"Hey. I was wonderin'... Goofy why are you starin' at me like that?"
'Hey Donald, get out of that slow roasted hotdog outfit. Oh well.'
"Come 'ere Donald!" Goofy got out his trusted fork from his pocket and started chasing Donald around.
"Whaaa-aaa!" Donald squealed.
Kairi was laughing, everyone was laughing. Only by mere chance Kairi glanced out the window and saw Sora. He motioned for her to get the door.
Knock Knock
"That's probably Sora with the pizza. I'll get it." Riku announced.
"No thanks, I'll get it." Kairi said and hurried towards the door not giving Riku time to answer. Kairi unlocked the door and took a step outside.
"Kai. We have to talk."
"Yea."
"About what happened I'm.."
"Sorry? Me .."
"Too?"
They both looked up from their feet.
"It was the guys tellin' me all these things. I was just stupid enough to believe."
"I'm not much different. I believed that if two people are suppose,"
They began talking in harmony. " to be together then they will end up together. But they laughed."
They stared deeply into each other's eyes and went in for a kiss. As their lips almost met, Riku yelled, "Sora get in here. We're hungry." Kairi took a step back from Sora and started walking back into the house.
"Goofy, that's my foot not bacon! Get off!"
Sora stepped in.
"Finally Sora," Riku snatched the pizzas from him and placed them on the table in the dining room. "All the decorations are put so we're going to sing a song. We can wait a little longer on the pizza. Everyone joined around the tree and held hands.
From left to right the circle went Cloud, still slouching on the wall, Tifa, Leon, Yuffie, Sora, Kairi, Riku, Aerith, and Donald.
"Riku there's no star." Leon growled.
"Oh that, I forgot."
"You always forget."
"Relax. Relax. Don't put your panties in a bunch."
"Hn." Leon snickered and flipped his hair.
"King Mickey's bringing it in his Gummi ship."
"Wait!" Sora dropped his hands from Kairi and Yuffie's. "If Mickey was coming in a Gummi ship, why did I have to go get the pizza?"
Riku completely disregarded his question. "Well he should be here anytime now."
"It was freakin' cold out there. Do you know how cold it was? No cause you didn't get your own ass out there."
"Sora language." Kairi said.
"Sorry Kai. Back to you Riku."
Knock Knock
"That must be the king. I'll get that."
"Get back here when I'm talkin' to you."
"Here's the star Riku." The king said as he wiped off the snow on his shoes on the welcome mat.
"Put it on the tree." Mickey leaped, with his massive hops, on top of the tree and placed the star.
"Okay everyone gather 'round the tree again." Now the arrangement from left to right was: Cloud, Tifa, Leon, Yuffie, Sora, Kairi, Riku, Mickey, Aerith, and Donald. "Does anyone know a Christmas song?"
"Oh come on Riku. This is getting annoying." Leon started to howl.
GrrrrrwlwTifa stomach gurgled. "Hehe. Guess I'm hungry." Tifa scratched her nose with one hand and her stomach with the other.
"It's settled then. We'll eat the pizza now." Cloud started speaking. He got off the wall and started heading for the dining room.
"He's not foolin' anyone. He's just hungry." Donald said.
"Has anyone see Goofy?" Yuffie asked puzzled.
"I think I found him." Cloud called from the other room. The others immediately ran in, except Sora.
'Roxas are you there?'
'Yea I'm here.'
'I'm sorry.'
'Don't be'
'But you were right. A more direct approach worked.'
'I only care about Naminé.'
'Don't say stuff like that!'
'Why not?'
'Because I care about Naminé too. And that's enough reason for you to care about Kairi.'
'...'
'I really am sorry about the Nobody thing.'
'Thank you.'
'Good bye Roxas.'
'Bye.' Sora hurriedly joined the others.
Pizza was everywhere, sauce was everywhere, cheese and pepperonis were everywhere, on the walls, the chairs, the ceiling (how did he get cheese up there?), the corners. At the heart of it all was Goofy. There was a pizza box on the floor and Goofy on all four legs, leaning his head like a dog in and taking fast, grizzly, bites. He looked like a dog with red rabies.
"Goofy!" The king rang.
"Who's there?" Goofy turned around and inquired. He looked left and right. "Who are you people?"
Sora stepped forward and started speaking. "Goofy, we're your friends and we're here to help. My name's Sora. Remember?"
"So-ra. Soorraa! What am I doing here? What's this stuff all over my face." His confusion didn't stop him from licking it clean.
The king started speaking again. "You were eating pizza. Were you that hungry?"
"Yes he was that hungry!" Donald squealed. "You missed the part where he was trying ta eat my foot earlier."
"Sorry guys I ate all your pizza."
"It's okay Goofy." Kairi tried to comfort him.
"Yea." Sora joined in. "I just had to walk a few miles in the cold to get it. That's all."
"What Sora was trying to was," Kairi caught his sarcasm and gave him the stink eye, "at least there's one pizza box left, so don't feel bad."
"Sorry Sor..Sor.." Goofy cheeks became inflated.
"He's gonna blow, on us. Tifa!" Yuffie wailed.
"On it." Tifa ran up to Goofy and kicked him in the face to make his head turn.
"Good job Tifa."
"Thanks."
Blaagh Now there was more pizza on the floor.
"Dude. Goofy my main man, not on the floor please. I have to clean that up you know." Riku pulled at his hair.
Blaagh
Blaagh
Blaagh
"Sorry Riku pal." The king went on. "I know I haven't been here very long, but I better take Goofy home. He's sick."
"Fine. Try not to let him throw-up on anymore carpet will you?"
"Sure thing pal."
"You can take a slice of pizza or two with you."
"Pizza?" Goofy stuttered. Blaagh
"I better not. It's looks like the word makes him sick. See ya. Donald ya comin'?"
"Yea. Bye Sora, Kairi." Donald spoke.
"What about me?" Riku said.
"Riku."
Vvrooom. "That's probably Cid." Leon stated. "So long Kairi and Sora."
"And me?" Riku said again.
"Bye." Cloud said as he walked out the door.
"See ya Soora." Yuffie said seductively. "Can't wait till next time. Oh, and nice seeing you too Kairi."
Kairi gave Sora the stink eye again. "Why do I get the feeling she likes you?"
"I honestly do not know." Sora scratched his head.
"I'm hungry so," Tifa spoke up. "I'm going to take this pizza box. I'll put two slices here on this napkin. There! All done. Good bye. The party was.. was.. well see ya next time."
Aerith turned before Sora and Kairi and bowed with each good bye. "Good bye Sora. Good bye Kairi. Thanks for the invite."
"You're welcome." Sora replied.
"He didn't invite you! I invited you! And where's my goodbye?" Riku was really starting to get frustrated.
Sora and Kairi both nodded. "Well Riku," Sora started. "its been fun."
"But we have to go now."
"Okay. But before you leave, Hugs!"
"Hugs?!" They both stared in unison.
"Yes." Riku went up to Kairi and gave her a big hug and kiss on the cheek. "Your turn Sora."
"Yuck." Sora pushed Riku off of him. "I don't want your stupid hug and I definitely don't want your kiss."
"You know what? You've been fighting me this entire time. So get out and bounce!"
"Let's go Kai." Sora said.
"Yea." Kairi agreed.
"That's right right you better bounce! Walk away and get out!"
"We will." Kairi said. "But we're taking the pizza. Run Sora run!" Riku started to chase after them, but he stopped once he reached the door.
'Look at the happy couple.' He said to himself and closed the door.
The tale is not over yet.
10 minutes later.
Knock Knock
Riku came stumbling towards the door and said, "Who is it?" after he opened it.
Kairi kicked him in the balls and while he was rapidly falling to the ground, holding the family jewels, he said, "Why?" in hushed voiced mixed with pain.
"You know why!" Kairi said pointing a finger in his face. Sora watched laughed and then followed Kairi out the door.
On the Destiny Islands, the snow laid on ground silently, just like Riku, until the next morning.
That's All Folks!
So what you think? I've been very eager to write this and a review would make it just dandy. I got that 'kick 'em in the balls' and 'you know why' part, from the movie What Happens in Vegas. Type in "you know why what happens in vegas" and you can see it on youtube. There's 2 parts one where the lady talks about doing it and actually does it. The ' ' parts were parts were a character talks to himself or at least not orally. Please review.