Kageyama had to admit, he hadn't thought of the Hinata that existed outside of club. He hadn't thought that maybe he worked hard in class and passed stupid notes to his friends- he hadn't even considered Hinata having any other friends besides himself. He hadn't thought of Hinata going home, being greeted by his younger sister and eating his dinner, telling his parents about school. He hadn't stopped to wonder about if Hinata even had a girlfriend. Kageyama wouldn't be surprised, Hinata was a good guy. Easy to be around under normal circumstances. But he had realized that he didn't know anything about Hinata's life outside of volleyball. When he pictured the smaller boy, he saw him running to spike the ball. He saw his orange hair wild and framing his intense amber eyes, sweat trickling down onto his collarbone and his leg muscles working to jump higher. In his mind's eye he had never actually imagined him sitting in class in a normal school uniform, staring out the window while the teacher droned on about something Hinata probably had no interest in.
Kageyama was surprised by this. He ate lunch with Hinata regularly, and they walked home together often, but he was so fixated on the game that Hinata played he had never really thought about any of it. Seeing Hinata laughing with people Kageyama hardly knew had brought him to this revelation, wondering if these were Hinata's friends, if he talked to them after school and had inside jokes with them and shared secrets about the girl he liked with them. It was jolting, now that he thought about it as he sat behind the stairs alone, but he should have known that Hinata didn't consider Kageyama his best friend. Kageyama was the only one that felt that way.
Oh sure, he had other friends… Or, he hoped the other guys in club considered him a friend. He knew he was unapproachable and intimidating sometimes, but he was trying to be better. Hinata had rubbed off and him, it seemed, and he considered himself better than his Kitagawa Daiichi days. Maybe he was the only one that thought so. Maybe everyone else on the team hated him. In that case, maybe Hinata also hated him.
He groaned and rested his forehead on his palms. It was impossible that Hinata hated him, right? The ball of energy couldn't hate anyone. He spent so much time with him, they had to be friends, right?
Kageyama's lunch sat half-eaten next to him on the stair beside him as he hid his face in his hands, thinking. He didn't hear the footsteps or the small yelp as the person missed a step and almost tumbled down.
"Kageyama, you- waah!"
Kageyama looked up at Hinata, surprised and caught unawares. When had he gotten there?
"Woah Kageyama, your face is scary!" Hinata said, then flinched when Kageyama stood, expecting his poor head to be grabbed. But Kageyama just sighed and mumbled an apology reluctantly, walking past the other to go back up the stairs. All that thinking had exhausted him.
"Oi Kageyama, you left your lunch!" A pause. "I'm gonna eat the rest of your rice!"
"Whatever, dumbass."
He waited for Hinata to jog up to his side, holding the box. "Hey, are you okay? You're not angry or anything?"
Kageyama turned to look at the redhead, his shoulders tense. He didn't know what expression he was making, but Hinata yelped again, backing away a few steps. He tried his best to look more pleasant. "No, I'm not… angry."
Hinata came back. "Well, just making sure you're okay!"
He was worried about him? This meant they were friends. They had to be friends.
"You wouldn't be able to play volleyball as well if you didn't feel good!" Hinata added, mimicking a spike with the hand holding the lunch box. "Waah! Oh no!"
Oh. Of course it was about volleyball. Kageyama felt stupid for assuming it would be about anything else. That's all he was to Hinata; the setter. He watched his middle blocker try to clean the rice and remnants of vegetables from the floor. He was glad this part of the school was deserted at the moment. He had a crazy urge to kiss the boy, just to see how he would react. Just to let himself down once and for all.
Hinata walked back, head down because he couldn't pick up all the rice, and Kageyama restrained himself from leaning down and pecking him on the lips. This clumsy kid couldn't possibly return his feelings.
The bell rang, and Hinata jumped, startled. "I gotta get back to class! Walk me, Kageyama!"
By walk apparently he meant run. As they reached his classroom, he turned. "We're walking home together after practice, right?"
It was time to test things. "Why?"
Hinata looked surprised and maybe a little offended. "We're friends, aren't we?"
Kageyama couldn't stop the ridiculous smile that spread across his cheeks as he walked to his own classroom. They were friends, weren't they?
((A/N: I actually just hate myself.))
