Rating: M (future content. . .this chapter is probably T)
Words: Approximately 4300
Parings: SakuraXGenma (future), SakuraXSasuke (maybe?), SakuraXKakashi (if you squint?). . . basically there are way too many almost connections in this story, just go with it
Summary/Warning: Confused Sakura, cliffhanger (slight?), sickeningly sweet Sasuke, bad decisions that definitely lead to more bad decisions
Notes: This is going to be a short story (probably three parts) and I should probably apologize in advance for it, but it's been way too much fun to write, so I won't. Enjoy!
Hands traced over Sakura's body with methodical slowness, pushing the unzipped flak vest aside, then lifting her shirt to explore her stomach. The touch was cold against her warm skin. That realization seemed terribly important but she couldn't remember why. Her shirt was pushed higher and she arched into the caress. Fingers ghosted, then gripped her hip, turning her onto her side. The icy ground felt soft when Sakura rolled onto her stomach. She kept her eyes shut and laid one cheek against the snow, unresisting as hands removed her flak vest. A shiver ran through Sakura's entire body when a hand brushed her lower back, following the path of her spine toward her shoulders.
The touch was brief enough to leave her wanting more when it slid over the newly exposed skin. The man grumbled something under his breath. Of course it was a man, she'd known that all along. Sakura didn't pay attention to words; his touch was more interesting. Long fingers brushed through pink hair, exposing her neck to the cold before allowing it to fall back into place. Sakura whimpered and fought briefly when the man tried to get her to move to her back but he was stronger.
There was a flash of pain when a rock bit into her hip, but Sakura's head landed against the softness of her flak vest. He'd used it as a pillow, how thoughtful. She struggling to grip onto the thought but it slid from her grasp. There were several light caresses on her stomach and for a moment, Sakura thought of kisses, but the touch was too cold. His hands were brushing the collar of her shirt aside, nimbly removing fabric to reach skin.
Pain seared through her, sharp and sudden, when his questing fingers touched her collar bone. Sakura writhed, struggling against the weight that held her firmly in place. The pain roared and she cried out nonsensically, squirming, but he pinned her against the ground until the fighting stopped. She sprawled, panting in the snow, as warmth flooded through her body. The pain dissipated, taking the cold with it, and she sighed.
"Mm," Sakura murmured, reaching toward the man. Her hand brushed the soft fabric of his sleeve, then the heavier, rougher material of his flak vest. It was reassuring, though she couldn't remember why she needed that. "Thanks, Kakashi," she mumbled, connecting the dots and letting her hand travel up to brush his warm cheek.
"Not quite," a deeper voice chuckled after a moment of surprised silence. He took her hand and laid it over her stomach. Sakura peeked her eyes open, trying to match the face to the voice. Her vision was blurry, and the light was so painfully bright that she groaned and closed them again. The man was talking but his words were too confusing to understand so she didn't try. Instead she sighed and lay back on her vest, shivering and gasping in soft breaths.
He didn't let Sakura remain still for long. "Come on, can you stand up?" Those words broke through the soft fuzziness of her consciousness only after being repeated three times. She tried to answer but the only thing she managed to say made him laugh. "Yeah, still not him," the man murmured. He slid one arm beneath her neck and the other under her legs, then lifted Sakura from the ground.
Sakura groaned as he brought her against his chest. The man was warm and the rough fabric of his vest scratched her cheek when she leaned into him. He was talking, Sakura could feel his chest move and hear the rumble of sound, but she couldn't understand what he was saying. Though she couldn't remember why, Sakura knew she needed to thank him. Unable to speak, she turned to kiss his vest before curling against the warmth of his presence.
"I've got you, Sakura," the ninja whispered, holding her tightly as he leaped through the bloody snow, leaving carnage behind
One Week Earlier
Since the Fourth Great Shinobi War ended, life was slowly returning to normal in Konoha. Tonight was a winter evening like a hundred other. Sakura was having dinner at the Korean Barbeque, strips of meat and vegetables spread on the grill in front of her and a glass of water beside her. The only thing that made it unusual, was the fact that she was eating with Sasuke, just the two of them. None of their friends had managed to invite themselves along, which was more surprising than the pair being on a date in the first place.
Sasuke was frowning and shaking his head. "Sakura, you cannot be serious. It's too dangerous."
A blush heated Sakura's cheeks when she dipped her head at Sasuke's words. "Nearly every mission we've accepted has been dangerous," she laughed. "The war was dangerous. This mission will be easy by comparison."
Sakura tucked a strand of pink hair behind her ear. Now that she was taking fewer missions, she'd decided to grow it out again and it was at the uncomfortable stage between short and long where it never did anything quite the way she expected. Tonight, the young woman didn't look much like an elite shinobi. Sakura was wearing a black dress that accentuated her body rather than jonin blues and flak vest that blended in with half the village. Her pale hair was loose, curling slightly around her face, not held back by her headband, and she was wearing traces of makeup that made her green eyes appear larger.
Sasuke looked different as well, more mature. He wore black pants, a long sleeved grey shirt, and a paler grey vest. The colors highlighted his features perfectly. Sasuke was still so handsome it hurt. Sakura took a moment to appreciate his long, raven-black locks and the piercing eyes that had only grown more intense with the passage of time. Normally, Sasuke held himself cold and aloof but sometimes, when it was just the two of them, Sakura would see the boy she fell in love with. His lips would curl into an almost smile and the façade slid just enough to show the real him.
Right now, however, Sakura could see the frustration etched on Sasuke's features. "Someone has to take the mission," she reasoned, continuing their discussion even though she suspected it was a bad idea.
Most of the jonin in Konoha had heard about the request that came across the Hokage's desk three days ago. A group of rogue ninja had kidnapped the eight-year-old son of one of the feudal lords and taken him to a stronghold in the mountains without demanding ransom. The details sounded normal enough but there was something strange about the mission. The Leaf was the only village the lord had contacted and rather than putting the request through the Allied Shinobi Forces, as had become the normal means of acquiring ninja for missions, Kakashi had been contacted directly. Though Sakura hadn't seen all the details, she knew Naruto had been specifically requested for the mission as well. So many little things that were just slightly off.
Sasuke picked up a piece of meat with his chopsticks, shaking his head a second time. "No, we don't have to accept the mission. Everything about it screams that it's a trap. I doubt the boy is even alive. If Hokage-sama thought there was any chance to save him, Kakashi would have sent someone already."
"Maybe and maybe not." Sakura took a sip of her water, considering. "Kakashi won't force someone to take it if he thinks it might be a trap. Maybe he is waiting for Naruto to get back to the village. He was requested after all."
"Hokage-sama would never endanger Naruto on a mission like that," Sasuke responded. "He'll probably decline the mission before the hothead gets back from his current assignment and learns about it. There's no proof that it's worth to risk, after all."
Sakura glanced at Sasuke. "We could go on the mission together. It would be almost like old times, just without Naruto and sensei." She only blushed slightly at the words. Sakura had been thinking of taking the mission since finding out about it, but news that Sasuke was back in town had driven the thought from her mind. Now that she could focus again, Sakura envisioned them fighting side by side, making up for the time they'd lost.
At her words, a shadow appeared on Sasuke's face, clouding his eyes and drawing his lips into a frown. "Sakura, please." He didn't sound angry. Instead, exhaustion laced his words.
After the war, Sasuke had devoted himself to finding and eliminating threats to the village. Sakura, much like the first time he'd left the village six years prior, had begged Sasuke to take her with him. He had refused, then, now, and continually. This discussion was a familiar argument for them. Sasuke sighed. "I can't be distracted by a bleeding heart mission that won't accomplish anything, Sakura. I have leads to follow up on."
Sakura felt disappointment swirl through her chest. "You just got back, and you're already planning to leave again?"
"I'll be here for a couple of days, making plans and giving reports but I have to go to the Land of Iron." Sasuke looked frustrated about having to disappoint her again, but Sakura knew it wouldn't be enough to make him stay. It never was. Sasuke reached out and caught her hand with his. "Can we please not do this again tonight?"
Sakura nodded and suspected, not for the first time, that this was the real reason she and Sasuke weren't dating. He hadn't asked her, of course, but even if he did, she wasn't sure what her answer would be. She was nineteen years old now, no longer the girl who'd been helplessly infatuated with him. Sakura loved Sasuke, and she thought he loved her too, but things weren't that simple. She was in a good place now: working at the hospital and helping with some of the war orphans during her free time. Even the Hokage had seen her usefulness, and frequently asked her opinion when policies touched either issue. But, despite everything she had, Sakura was still conscious of missing something. Sasuke almost answered that longing.
Sasuke squeezed her hand, attempting to draw Sakura from the uncharacteristically dark thoughts he saw in her eyes. His gaze seared through her with its intensity. "Sakura, I don't want to ruin tonight. Can we please talk about something else?"
"Of course," Sakura agreed with a smile that was only slightly faked. "I'm sorry to complain. I just miss you."
"I know and I'm sorry." Sasuke's voice was soft. "I miss you too, but it won't be like this forever. I just need some time."
Sakura nodded, not bothering to separate the half-truths from the full ones. After the war, Sasuke had been absolved of crimes in part due to Naruto and Kakashi's influence, as well as his own contribution, but Sakura knew he was still trying to making amends for the wrongs he'd done. Kami only knew how long that would take, or if she could wait that long. But for now, they were both here and that was enough. At least for tonight.
The tension eased out of the conversation and they talked about lighter things. Both shook their heads over the fact Hinata was still completely in love with Naruto but the blond hadn't realized it yet. They laughed about other couples forming and breaking up, the changes the village had undergone, and the things he'd experienced outside of Konoha. Sakura talked more than Sasuke, but he listened, head tipped slightly to side, and nodded at all the right places. Their conversational banter was easy, comfortable, and familiar.
The restaurant was nearly deserted by the time they left, as were the streets outside. Sakura shivered and exhaled in a wispy stream of white. Her outfit may have made her look more enticing, but it failed miserably at keeping her warm. Chill bumps rose immediately on her arms and legs. Noticing this, Sasuke slid an arm around her shoulders and guided her closer.
Sakura froze for a moment; Sasuke had never put his arm around her before. To support her on missions, sure, but never like this. She turned her face against his chest so his dark cloak could almost cover both of them. He was warm and perfect and everything she'd ever wanted. The soft scent of him made her head spin and the emptiness in her chest eased.
Her inner Sakura surged to the surface yelling cha and triumphantly gloating that she'd show Ino which one of them got the boy in the end. Sakura suppressed it. Her friend was taken with Sai these days, though how she was ever going to get the boy to show any emotion was beyond Sakura. Maybe it was the fact that Ino couldn't see past the things Sasuke had done, or maybe she simply viewed him as belonging to Sakura now. Either way, their shared, former obsession was no longer a point of contention. In fact, the girls had become close after everything they'd been through.
When they reached her apartment, both Sakura and Sasuke paused awkwardly. The night was cold enough to snow, but the sky was inky clear, studded with silver stars. Slipping from beneath Sasuke's arm and cloak, Sakura leaned against the door frame, looking up at the sky like it might offer her some answers. She felt Sasuke move and turned to face him as he leaned in to kiss her. It was tender and unsure, barely more than a brush of his lips against hers. Those weren't normally emotions she connected with the confident Sasuke but they fit. His hand came up to brush her cheek and Sakura's breath trembled in her throat. This was another first for him, though not the first time they'd kissed. Her heart fluttered when he broke the contact.
Slightly dizzy, Sakura wondered if she should invite Sasuke inside. He'd been there once before, but half of their friends had been in tow. She dropped her hand to touch Sasuke's, then met his eyes. He was smiling and Sakura blushed under the expression. I can do this, I'm an adult, she reminded herself. "Do you want to come in?" She asked. There, wording it that way left the decision entirely up to him. Sakura wasn't going to press Sasuke for more than he was willing to give; he would be gone again in a few days anyway.
"Yes, I do," Sasuke murmured, brushing his warm lips against hers a second time. Sakura shivered in a way that had nothing to do with the cold as he pressed his forehead against hers, looking into her eyes. "But I can't." Her heart fell. "I have a meeting tomorrow morning with Kakashi and Shikamaru. You know how Nara is about his details. My notes and maps need more work before I can present them." Sakura looked up at him without speaking, seeing her own reflection in his dark eyes. "Maybe we can meet for lunch after that?"
"Of course," Sakura whispered, trying to hide her mix of emotions at the words. It seemed like she'd been settling a lot tonight.
Sasuke was still close enough to touch, his warmth seeping into her and for a moment Sakura thought about opening the door and pulling him into her apartment no matter what responsibilities he had. But for a reason she couldn't put words to, Sakura hesitated and the moment passed.
"I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" Sasuke's voice was confident and Sakura found herself nodding. He turned to leave, then paused and looked back at her. "Sakura, I want you to stop thinking about taking that mission. It's too dangerous or Kakashi would have assigned it to you. Let someone else take care of it."
Sakura nodded. She'd never been the best at hiding her thoughts, so it didn't surprise her that Sasuke had some inkling of what was bothering her. He was painfully blind to the other issue right before his eyes though. "Yeah," she answered noncommittally, giving him a hug before stepping into her apartment alone.
The pink-haired girl leaned against the door as soon as it closed, hands balled into fists tight enough for her nails to bite her palms. Almost, so close, not quite, not good enough. The words pounded through her mind in time with her heart. Even after all this time, Sasuke still saw her that way. She wasn't strong enough for the mission, wasn't enough for him.
Sakura knew she should sleep, letting go of the annoyance she felt, but it clutched at her. She should make a cup of tea, take a bath, something, anything except get angrier at being dismissed. Instead, Sakura pulled off the dress she'd worn for the date and tossed it across her bed. Opening a drawer, she found the familiar navy outfit, changed into it, then rescued her flak vest from the closet. She looked at herself in the mirror as she pulled her hair back with the headband. The makeup made her look older and less like herself but the jonin outfit felt like coming home. With a glance at the image of Team Seven on her nightstand, Sakura flipped the lights off and left her apartment.
It was still just as cold in the street but the long-sleeved shirt and pants kept Sakura warm, as did the vest that was zipped over her chest. Moving through the village quietly and quickly came naturally, borne of habit rather than necessity. Everything was dark and deserted but up ahead, Sakura could see warm light spilling from the windows of the Hokage's office. Of course her former sensei would be there. Once Kakashi finally accepted the position, he threw himself into it, working far longer hours than Tsunade ever had.
Sakura paused around the corner and gathered her courage. She could make Kakashi-sensei see her side as long as she appealed to his reason. When she strode into the hallway, neither guard turned in her direction but Sakura knew they were aware of her presence. Namiashi Raido and Shiranui Genma were flanking the door tonight. She had gotten to know Kakashi's guards over the past months and liked them all for the most part. Raido was quiet, but kind and funny if you got him out of his shell and Genma was, well the nicest way Sakura could think to describe the man was that Genma was innuendo wrapped in charisma. But he made her laugh; he made everyone laugh. And, if the stories were to be believed, he made more than a few hearts beat faster.
Genma slouched with his shoulders against the wall and one foot tucked beneath him, looking the epitome of passivity. Sakura knew that he, like Kakashi, allowed people to believe he was lazy or disinterested with what was happening around him but that couldn't be further from the truth. She had seen him shift when she entered the hallway, ready to eliminate any threat that might present itself. The man's hazel eyes turned toward her and he smiled around the senbon perched in his teeth.
"I wouldn't go in there if I were you, Sakura," Genma offered affably. "He's in a bad mood tonight."
"Do you ever think he's in a good one?" Sakura laughed. When Raido's smiled, she thought about how strange it was that these two were friends. They were so different. Genma was flirty and playful where Raido was calm and focused. They made a good team though.
Genma pushed off the wall. "Sometimes. It's a rare occasion with Kakashi though, always has been. Are you going to make his night better?" His voice was teasing and after running his eyes over her, Genma smirked. "Since you're not wearing a cute little nurse's outfit, I guess that's a long shot. Can you at least try not to make it any worse?"
"I only wear that for special occasions," Sakura responded with an innocent smile, enjoying the momentary surprise on Genma's face. "Besides, you're the one that has to deal with his bad mood, not me. Why should I make your life any easier?"
Raido snorted a laugh and shook his head as Genma mumbled something about women under his breath. Patting his chest on the way by, Sakura slipped into the Hokage's office and shut the door behind her.
As soon as she entered the room, Kakashi looked up from his paperwork. Sakura couldn't help but think about how different he appeared now. Her former sensei wasn't wearing a headband and with it, his silver hair fell into his eyes. Both eyes, iron grey. It was strange seeing him without the Sharingan, but that was another one of those things they didn't talk about.
"Sakura," Kakashi acknowledged with a dip of his head. She felt his eyes travel over her uniform and though it was unusual for her to wear it, he didn't ask why. Far more common was civilian clothing or the white uniform that marked her as a medical ninja. No matter what fantasies Genma might harbor, Sakura didn't actually own a cute little nurse's outfit, for special occasions or otherwise.
"You're working late," Sakura observed, glimpsing the piles of paperwork on the desk.
Kakashi's eyes creased in a familiar smile. "And you're observant as always." Though he still wore the black mask that covered the lower half of his face, seeing both of Kakashi's eyes made his emotions easier to discern. Not that Sakura had an exceptional amount of trouble reading him before. As much time as they had spent together, she had gotten pretty good at picking up on his thoughts. At least, she thought she had.
"Why does Genma think you're in a bad mood?" Sakura frowned, settling in a chair.
"Because if he thinks I'm in a bad mood, he's more careful and I don't have to put up with his teasing." Kakashi replied matter-of-factly. His tone was almost playful and Sakura's mouth fell open.
When Sakura thought about it, it did make a twisted kind of sense. Kakashi always had enjoyed making fun of Team Seven during their years together. The man had a way of pushing people's buttons without trying. "Does that actually work?" She asked skeptically.
"Sometimes," Kakashi raised his shoulders in a shrug then met Sakura's eyes. "But I'm pretty sure you didn't come here to talk about Genma. What's up?"
Sakura bit the inside of her cheek and watched Kakashi. His dual-eyed gaze was more intense, even after months of time to get used to it. She took a deep breath to steady herself, then made her request. "I want to take the mission to rescue the feudal lord's son."
For several minutes, Kakashi didn't speak. He looked at Sakura until she felt like a wayward genin again but she refused to back down. She met his stare, green eyes holding steady on dark grey. Finally, Kakashi shook his head. "No."
"Why not?" Sakura asked, voice carefully calm.
Again, Kakashi paused and Sakura knew he was choosing his words. "Sakura, it's a dangerous mission and-"
The words were so similar to Sasuke's that Sakura interrupted before he could finish. "You'd let either of the boys go." Frustration was building in her chest and there was a bitter accusation in her voice. She had proven herself in the war, hadn't she? Her entire life had been spent chasing after her teammates, trying to keep up with them. No one seemed to see that she had gotten stronger. The fact that Kakashi-sensei denied it hurt more than she cared to admit. When he didn't answer, she continued. "But they can't take the mission, can they? Naruto is out of the village already and Sasuke is too busy to be bothered."
Kakashi weathered her storm in silence, then narrowed his eyes. "You asked Sasuke?"
Sakura almost growled with frustration. "I am just as strong as either of them," she complained, temper flaring in her voice. Kakashi looked at her with that calm demeanor of his, waiting for her to realize what she'd just said. Yes, Sakura was a capable shinobi in her own right, and as a medic, she was unrivaled except for Tsunade. Still, she paled in comparison to either Sasuke or Naruto. Kakashi and Sakura both knew it, but he was kind enough not to say it. "I can do this, Hokage-sama."
"No, Sakura, you can't." Kakashi looked at her with unyielding eyes. "I forbid it."
"You forbid it?" Sakura's voice raised several octaves as she choked Kakashi's words back at him. The man had the audacity to nod. "I'm not some genin that you can order around anymore." She wanted the illogical words back as soon as she said them, anger speaking before reason.
Kakashi raised one eyebrow. "No, you're a jonin under my tenure as Hokage. And as such, you will obey my command, whether you agree or not." He exhaled and closed his eyes for a moment. When he reopened them, they were softer. "Sakura, this miss-"
"Of course, Hokage-sama," Sakura stood, trembling. Her hand was balled into a fist for the second time tonight and she wanted nothing so much as to slam it into his desk. Breaking furniture was probably not the way to handle this situation, though. "As you wish, Kakashi-sama." She pelted him with the title and honorific that, while deserved, still made him uncomfortable.
Kakashi said her name but Sakura was already halfway across the room, no longer listening. "Sorry to have bothered you," she spat, jerking the door open, making Genma and Raido leap to attention and reach for their weapons. The resounding slam echoed in Kakashi's ears long after she was gone.