Haha I am actually doing this even though no one ships it. There was like… five when it first came up, but now it's dead. We'll see how it turns out this time around. I honestly don't know if it'll end up with romance again, but for now, they'll have the magic of friendship.
Rating subject to go up because of... author note language.
Nintendo and Konami properties aren't mine, yada yada yada
Within the fight simulator of the Smash mansion, four Smashers were duking it out in an old school battle. Two had already gone down, leaving a fierce rivalry to unfold on the stage. The younger looking warrior nearly panicked as he desperately air jumped back and used his saving move to get back on the stage. He could almost feel the ground under his feet again when it became clear he would not make it.
"And the winner is… Link!"
The four Smashers exited the fight simulator, laughing.
"If I didn't miss that landing, I so would have won!" Pit laughed. Link just chuckled and gently ruffled the angel's hair.
"It's-a too bad the-a sim-a limits your flight." Mario commented. "You could-a won."
"Poyo!" Kirby exclaimed in agreement.
Pit immediately scowled. "Not like I could fly anyway. The sim is the closest I get to flying." He sighed in defeat. "The flight instructors back home in Angel Land never let me do lessons because they thought my wings were too puny. And now that they grew out, I was suddenly recruited here."
"Do you regret it?" Link asked quietly.
"Of course not, I love it here! I just wish I could learn how to fly and keep fighting here at the same time."
"Poyo poyo!"
Mario took off his hat to scratch his head. "You can ask-a someone to-a come here." The Italian plumber suggested after some thought."
"I can't ask them that!" Pit nearly shouted. "Besides, Master Hand wouldn't let them stay for very long. I mean Roy, Mewtwo, and Pichu barely gets to visit…"
"What about someone who's already here?"
The three humanoids stared down at the happy pink ball. Kirby stared back inquisitively, but giggled happily at the attention.
"He flies by inflating." Pit moaned. "I can't blow myself up to fly!"
"So does-a Jigglypuff…"
"And Charizard can't talk, man this sucks!"
"Aren't you forgetting someone?" The sole Hyrulian rubbed his temples, feeling a headache coming on when no one answered. "What about Meta Knight?"
Pit and Mario stopped to look at each other. After a long and frustrating winning streak, Master Hand had asked politely asked Meta Knight to stop participating in most tournaments, murmuring something about how he was "severely unbalanced". The masked knight was upset at first, but stated that he would step down from those tournaments because he it was the chivalrous thing to do. Now, he was simply content to participate in battles for fun although it was rumored he spent a good amount of time beating on the Fighting Alloys during tournaments. He was normally elusive even outside of battle, so it was no wonder he managed to evade Pit and Mario's memory.
"Meta Knight might-a not be the best person to ask for that right-a now." Mario coughed.
"Poyo poyo." Kirby babbled dismissively. The star warrior leaped onto Pit's head, wiggling around to get comfortable. From there, he pointed with his chubby arm to the hall. "Go!"
The angel laughed at the puffball's actions. "If you think it's a good idea Kirby, I'll do it!" He then dashed off, leaving Mario and Link in the lobby.
"Mamma Mia, they're-a gunna get it now." Mario sighed. "The Princess said she-a finally convinced Meta Knight to have-a tea with her."
In his excitement, Pit seemed to have forgotten one major detail. He skid to a stop and held his arms out to catch his round companion. "Oh wait Kirby, where would Sir Meta Knight be?" He asked. Kirby gave him a blank stare and shrugged, much to the brunet's disappointment.
"Poyo…"
"Don't blame yourself, you were only trying to help me." He hugged Kirby reassuringly. "We'll just have to look for him!"
"Poyo!"
It only took a few minutes of running down the halls for Kirby to perk back up. He writhed in Pit's arms and suddenly dashed to the gardens. "Hey—Kirby! Wait up!" It soon became clear why Kirby had acted up. The smell of freshly baked cookies was getting stronger and stronger. The angel only knew where this was going. The pink décor that matched his sense of doom was unmistakable. They were running straight for one of Peach's tea parties. "Kirby, no!" He was thankful he was starting to gain on the gluttonous Dreamlander. Right at the gates of the princess' private area, he was just about to scoop Kirby up, when the simulator's physics caught up with him. He tripped and skidded painfully to a stop, uprooting quite a bit of dirt and grass. He did feel Kirby stop to poke his head, but the pain was too much. Luckily, no one was around to see.
"Oh, are you okay Pit?"
He cursed his luck to Hades. He lifted his head and wiped his face off to grin at Peach.
"I'm made of tough stuff, Princess!" Pit answered cockily.
"Good, then you can handle this!" Before he could ask, the blonde princess bent down and pinched his cheek, pulling on it viciously. "What are you doing here? You know not to barge in on one of my tea parties without an invitation!"
"Ow, ow, plea leggo Princess!" Pit strained. Peach angrily threw his head back down to the dirty, letting out an indignant hmph. "Kirby smelled the food and I was trying to stop him!"
"Kirby?" Peach gasped. "Oh dear, I'm so sorry Pit. Won't you please forgive me?"
"Heh heh hehe… I never held it against you…"
Peach helped Pit back onto his feet and immediately took a handkerchief out to wipe his face clean. "Tell you what, Pit! As an apology, I'll let you come to the tea party."
"That won't be necessary—wait, what about Kirby?"
"Kirby can come too! Oh I would be so grateful if he did… We overdid it with the baking. There's too many pastries for us to finish!"
On cue, Kirby jumped out of the bush he was hiding in and landed in Peach's arms.
"Pastries, pastries!"
"Oh, well hello Kirby!" Peach cooed sweetly. "Would you like to join us for some tea?"
"Poyo!" Kirby chirped in affirmation.
"Well have a good time," Pit said. "I need to look for—"
"Now hold it right there young man!" Peach interrupted. "I invited you to tea, I must insist you come!"
"But I—"
"Pretty please?"
"Poyo!"
The two pink figures loomed over the poor angel, giving him no option to retreat. He wished he hadn't chased Kirby into the garden and just continued his search for Meta Knight. His luck was being a cruel master, or so he thought. Those cookies did smell awfully good…
No! He had to learn how to fly so he could protect Palutena better. He found his inability to fly an embarrassment to the army, and he was sure some of his peers felt the same way, regardless of Palutena's constant assurance that he was perfect to lead the army. That's his reason for entering the tournament, not to sit around and have tea! But those cookies were so very tempting…
"You're back!" He heard Zelda say. Pit snapped out of his daydreaming and looked. As expected, Princess Zelda was seated at the table, blowing on her cup of tea. Marth was also there, but that was no surprise in retrospect. The real shock had been with who sat next to Marth. He was hidden behind a stack of pies, but it was unmistakable.
"Sir Meta Knight!" Pit exclaimed. The masked knight coughed.
"Can I help you?" He asked.
"Er, actually." The angel began nervously. "I did have something to ask you."
"I will hear it after this is over. It is impolite to interrupt an afternoon tea with a request."
Pit scowled, but sat as he was told. Kirby bounced onto his lap, happily sucking up the sugary treats in front of them. Peach left to bring back more cushions for Kirby to sit on his own chair before settling down. Zelda poured them each a cup of tea, giggling softly.
"How was the match today?" She asked kindly.
"It was good! Link won."
"Poyo!"
The Hyrulian princess gave him a thoughtful look. "You really do respect Link quite a bit."
"He's like a big brother to me!"
Marth chuckled at the brunet's cheerfulness. "I don't suppose you have a figure like Link back home."
"Not really… The instructors didn't even like me until after I defeated Medusa."
"That is a shame." Meta Knight commented. "You are a fine soldier. Only a fool wouldn't be able to recognize that."
Pit blushed slightly at the praise. "I've only got where I am because Palutena helped me."
The rest of the tea party had been a huge bore, especially while Pit was still running on leftover adrenaline from the match. The others had chosen to discuss politics of all things. He tried to listen, but failed miserably, deciding that politics took the spot under Jigglypuff's singing for things that put him to sleep fastest. Kirby kept poking him awake, seemingly immune to the boring subject. In a rare gesture of generosity, he placed a few cookies on Pit's tiny plate. He even poured him tea, but threw in half a cup's worth of sugar cubes.
"Poyoi."
Kirby looked at him sweetly, trying to coax him to indulge on the sugary goodness. The unfortunate angel, unable to resist the Dreamlander's charm, choked back his tea. Pit had to force a smile to please his younger friend.
"Poyo."
Kirby gestured to the plate of cookies in front of Pit, who apprehensively picked one up. Preparing for another spike in sugar. To his surprise, it wasn't as ridiculously sweet as his tea had been. He chewed slowly, taking in the rich flavor of the bitter chocolate that contrasted well with the sweetness of the cookie dough.
"Do you like it?" Marth suddenly asked with an amused tone. "Sir Meta Knight baked it."
"Lord Marth!" the armored puffball protested.
"It's nothing to be ashamed of." Peach giggled. "They are very good!"
"I must take my leave now." He muttered quickly. He pushed away from the table and tried to jump off his chair, but Marth quickly caught him.
"What for?" The Altean prince teased. "I don't recall you having any other engagements today."
Like in battle, the tiny knight was quick on his feet. "Pit, didn't you have something you wanted to discuss with me?"
"Uhh, yeah." Pit answered, feeling slightly used.
"Then let's go." Somehow, Meta Knight managed to slip away, much to Marth's disappointment. Pit hastily followed him out of the pink decorations and to the hall. He suddenly turned around, glaring.
"If you tell anyone else about this, I will have no mercy on you." He hissed in a low voice. The angel made a mental note to never, under any circumstances, ever anger the puffball.
"I understand!" Pit squeaked, his voice higher than he intended. Meta Knight just closed his eyes and sighed.
"Well? What was your request?"
It took a moment for Pit to gather back his dignity to answer. He cleared his throat, suddenly nervous. "I want to learn how to fly."
Meta Knight gave him a look and began to circle him. He inspected his fellow knight with intense scrutiny before finally giving his verdict. "It will be tough, but not impossible." He finally concluded. "But why did you ask me? My body type isn't even remotely similar to yours."
"Er, what do you mean by that?"
"You have a humanoid structure, I do not. Our weight distribution isn't the same, let alone body-to-wing ratio. You are much too heavy for your wings."
"Are you calling me fat?" Pit huffed, offended. But he immediately backed down, realizing how stupid that was.
"No Pit." Meta Knight sighed. "Your bones are solid, and that's what weighs you down the most. A bird's bones are hollow, which makes it light enough to fly."
"What about you?"
"I don't have bones in my body."
"But how do yo—"
"It's complicated and messy."
An awkward silence overtook the pair before Pit cleared his throat and spoke up once more.
"But you said it wasn't impossible."
"And I said it would be tough and time consuming. Are you prepared for that?" Meta Knight stared him down, intent on intimidating him, but Pit stood firm.
"I want to fly." He said with firm conviction. "I NEED to fly. I won't be able to protect my Goddess Palutena if I can't fly."
The short knight nodded, satisfied by his answer. "Very well then. I will ask Master Hand for a special simulator for this training."
"You can do that?"
"He owe mes that much for barring me from tournaments."
Pit stared at him silently. He knew he was a man of honor, so the thought of him calling favors surprised him. But he didn't care. He was getting his flight lessons! He almost picked up his mentor in happiness, halting only when he saw the intense glare. He gulped and settled for a quick salute.
"Thank you very much, Sir Meta Knight!" He blurted. "I won't fail you!"
"Remember that determination then, Pit." Meta Knight said. "You will need it." Before the angel could question what he meant by that, the puffball was already heading back to his room. He paused in his step to add, "I'll let you know when the lessons start. In the mean time, enjoy your free time."
Suddenly, the good feeling was gone.
Honestly, I had this sitting on my computer for a bit. I know others published the idea of Meta Knight being banned in game already, so I feel less special. (10/25/11)