A/N: So these will be short (sorry!) and may not make much sense at all. :P Just warning ya! I suppose some later chapters should be rated high T for Harkness-level innuendo. There will be multiple plot lines that continue as I write them, all mixed together. So good luck.

The Chair, Part I

Everyone knew it was Kirk's chair. He loved that chair. Noone dared sit in it if they weren't currently in charge; despite that being protocol, it was followed strictly purely because it was Kirk's chair. (Legend among the lower decks said he had a replica in his quarters.)

So when the Enterprise walked barefoot onto the Bridge and sat in the chair, everyone on duty held their breath and waited for the Captain to return.

Five minutes later, Kirk walked onto the bridge and stopped. A familiar silver head was showing over the back of the command chair. His Chair. Nobody but her would dare to occupy his rightful place as Captain. A childish urge struck him, and for once his common sense was in agreement.

Calmly, Kirk walked up behind the Enterprise, placed a hand on her back, and shoved.

As the Enterprise recovered after almost crashing into Sulu, Kirk retook the Chair, hazel eyes showing nothing but slight bemusement.

The Enterprise glared at him, then stalked off. "I believe I'm needed in Engineering," she said.

"... And then he shoved me off!" The Enterprise gesticulated wildly as she leaned against the wall. Up in the Jeffries tube next to her, Scotty produced a muffled noise of indeterminate intent.

"And just bypass that whole circuitboard, it's shot and not really necessary," she added, referring to the reason Scotty was in the tube.

The engineer produced another muffled sound.

"Take that circuit block out of your mouth. I wouldv'e held it for you, you know."

An orange circuit block tumbled to the floor. The Enterprise picked it up and examined it.

"Yeah, it's shot... Ick. It's slimy." The Enterprise made a face. "Anyways. I intend to retake the Chair."

"Why?" Scotty asked.

"He pushed me! Anything else and I wouldv'e let it go. But... This. Means. WAR."